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The Flood / Re: Justice League (2017)
« on: November 15, 2017, 07:00:38 AM »
This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to. 5162
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 15, 2017, 06:32:32 AM »this is how i know i'm righthonestly, i should've just posted "you've never experienced voluntary celibacy, so that's why you don't understand it," but i'm pretty sure the irony would've been lost on most of you anyway😂 5163
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 15, 2017, 06:24:48 AM »You failed to substantiate why my reasons for it not being pointless to me were wrong and have done little more than give highly subjective value statements on why sex is so bad and all these alternatives are so much better. Don't go pretend now that this was all I said just because I'm not interested in keeping up with this discussion any longer.it pretty much was all that you said, though Quote I think you underestimate how important that kind of intimacy can be for bonding, building trust and maintaining a healthy relationship. If you've never experienced this, it's near impossible to really understand. this is basically the crux of your last response, and it's complete nonsense it's not impossible for me to understand at all, and in fact, i probably understand it more than you 5164
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 15, 2017, 05:37:59 AM »
honestly, i should've just posted "you've never experienced voluntary celibacy, so that's why you don't understand it," but i'm pretty sure the irony would've been lost on most of you anyway
basically you're all dipshits 5165
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 15, 2017, 05:18:37 AM »
failure to engage in a little bit of self-awareness is a tell-tale sign of lower intelligence, because you're living your life on autopilot
meanwhile, i spend all day and night thinking about this stuff so whenever someone says anything like, "you wouldn't understand, because you've never had the experience," the hilarious thing is, 99 times out of 100, they're ALWAYS wrong—because i'd eventually go on to experience whatever it is i haven't experienced, and it winds up being EXACTLY how i thought it would be, every single time it's almost like you don't actually need to experience anything in order to understand whether it has any real purpose it's almost like i can simply observe shit and make judgment calls based off of those observations if the value of something cannot be observed or even described in words, then it probably has no value at all—"get laid and then come back to me" is the most childish cop-out rebuttal you could possibly make 5166
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 15, 2017, 04:42:48 AM »kind of? but not really, i'm just engaging in meta-analysis of my own behavior and human behavior as a wholeDo you believe that the mind and the brain are separate?it's not a moral high ground, it's an intellectual one"i'm finding it difficult to bond with my girlfriend because she hasn't touched my peepee in a long time"Ignoring biological urges does not equal intellectual maturity exactly. You're partaking in suppression of your desires, which, generally will surface at some point down the road in some form. I don't think you have some moral high ground because you don't like the idea of a girl stimulating your peepee. it's more that i recognize that the brain has multiple departments designated for separate functions, and not all of these functions are necessary or even good in fact, some of these functions are toxic, and we're better off without them the functions i'm interested in keeping are the functions that separate us from wild animals—mainly, our enhanced ability to think, reason, judge, communicate 5167
The Flood / Re: Verb gives his shitty opinions on anime (redux) #FuckAnime« on: November 14, 2017, 10:42:27 PM »this is the anime thread isn't itThe Road or grave?he was inspired by my patrician tasteI just watched Grave of the Fireflies.Why would you do that to yourself? The Road alone is tough to watch. 5168
The Flood / Re: Verb gives his shitty opinions on anime (redux) #FuckAnime« on: November 14, 2017, 10:37:03 PM »he was inspired by my patrician tasteI just watched Grave of the Fireflies.Why would you do that to yourself? The Road alone is tough to watch. 5169
Gaming / Re: The Game Awards« on: November 14, 2017, 08:29:22 PM »Fate GO deserves best mobilewhat other mobile games have you played 5170
The Flood / Re: Verb gives his shitty opinions on anime (redux) #FuckAnime« on: November 14, 2017, 08:27:30 PM »Cromartie High School is funny. Low budget in the best way, 26eps running 12 minutes each. Also had a dub that aired on G4.g4 aired anime? 5171
Gaming / Re: Favorite Mario games?« on: November 14, 2017, 05:16:23 PM »>The only Mario RPG you should ever playi'm open to playing the mario & luigi games i've played enough of paper mario 64 though, i think ttyd invalidates it in every way 5172
Gaming / Re: Favorite Mario games?« on: November 14, 2017, 04:54:22 PM »I don't particularly enjoy Mario gameshmm the franchise has spanned pretty much every genre, i would be surprised if there wasn't something for you 5173
Gaming / Re: Pokémon Central« on: November 14, 2017, 03:18:34 PM »
the reviews for ultra sumo are out
Quote The progression, both story and gameplay-wise, is pretty indistinguishable from Sun and Moon (aside from the occasional interjection from the Ultra Recon Squad) up until the plot climax about 25 hours in. sigh who else is /notgettingthisgame/ here 5174
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 14, 2017, 03:14:08 PM »haven't seen one episodethis is your mind on Rick and Mortyit's not a moral high ground, it's an intellectual one"i'm finding it difficult to bond with my girlfriend because she hasn't touched my peepee in a long time"Ignoring biological urges does not equal intellectual maturity exactly. You're partaking in suppression of your desires, which, generally will surface at some point down the road in some form. I don't think you have some moral high ground because you don't like the idea of a girl stimulating your peepee. 5175
Gaming / Re: The Game Awards« on: November 14, 2017, 02:02:52 PM »
Breath of the Wild is GOTY. I don't really care about the other categories.
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The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 14, 2017, 01:57:07 PM »it's not a moral high ground, it's an intellectual one"i'm finding it difficult to bond with my girlfriend because she hasn't touched my peepee in a long time"Ignoring biological urges does not equal intellectual maturity exactly. You're partaking in suppression of your desires, which, generally will surface at some point down the road in some form. I don't think you have some moral high ground because you don't like the idea of a girl stimulating your peepee. and it's not that i don't like the idea—i love the idea but i hate being in the body of an organism who actually enjoys such stupid shit 5177
Gaming / Re: The Game Awards« on: November 14, 2017, 01:35:49 PM »
it's not notable unless baconshelf is interested in it
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The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 14, 2017, 01:19:26 PM »i can't tell you how likely it is that i will do a complete 180 the moment that my penis goes inside of a vaginatoo much on the tacos homie I ain't feelin it😂😂😂Flee just drop it he can't understand because he hasn't experienced it.yeah i'm gonna have sex and then i'm going to completely change my mind how could it not, sex is the most important thing in the world, duh 5179
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 14, 2017, 01:11:30 PM »Flee just drop it he can't understand because he hasn't experienced it.yeah i'm gonna have sex and then i'm going to completely change my mind once i put my genitals inside of someone else's genitals, my entire philosophy will just implode 5180
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 14, 2017, 01:09:43 PM »my gf has'nt show me her bob and vegene anymore in 2 days"i'm finding it difficult to bond with my girlfriend because she hasn't touched my peepee in a long time"hahahahaha ![]() ![]() ![]() 5181
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 14, 2017, 12:56:12 PM »
"i'm finding it difficult to bond with my girlfriend because she hasn't touched my peepee in a long time"
"i'm having trust issues with my wife because she doesn't let me touch her fatty round parts anymore" "oh no white stuff hasn't come out of my penis in like two days i've lost control of my relationship i want to die" you're right, i have absolutely no fucking idea what being that pathetic is like, and i NEVER want to know 5182
The Flood / Re: Who else is gunna do No Fap November with me?« on: November 14, 2017, 12:50:43 PM »You called me out on saying I thought it was pointless to stop having sex because you think it's pointless to begin with. I gave you some very real benefits which I think make it anything but pointless, some of which you ignored (the role it serves in relationships) or didn't really get to (the prostate cancer one that isn't compensated by just urinating). Your response to that was giving me alternatives which don't all accomplish the same things while being as effortless, fun and effective (and no, I don't think it's false to say that 10 minutes of sexual stuff before bed is more fun or takes less effort than switching your diet or working out).celibacy is not this weird alien concept—celibates may not hate sexuality as much as i do, but they have just as much of a need for it, and that's why they're celibate indeed, millions of couples already live happily in sheer celibacy, so whatever role you think sex serves in relationships must not be all that important after all—at BEST, it's dependent on the individual, in which case i would argue that the couples who engage in celibacy have ascended to a higher level of thinking than those who haven't, because they can actually see the beauty and value of their romance without relinquishing themselves to their carnal biological impulses and no, i never said that urination prevents prostate cancer; that was a response to a completely different item (and granted, one that i misread as well): "ridding yourself of disease-causing toxins building up in your urinary tract" UTIs are a very strange thing for a male to worry about, but having good hygiene is a pretty surefire way to prevent that, if you're that worried about it (which you shouldn't be, because UTIs in males are kind of fucking rare) meanwhile, the alternative solution i gave for the prevention of prostate cancer was a vegan diet—i never said anything about urination coming up with these alternative solutions feels like a waste of time, though, because even if i gave you the most immediately appealing alternative solutions, you would still say something like "well why can't i do both" if you didn't want alternatives, i imagine you wouldn't have asked for any—but by doing so, you've diluted the discussion, when the core of the conversation is "why have sex" and not "what can i do other than sex" so you list the benefits of sex, and i tell you that the same benefits can be achieved elsewhere—to which your response, of course, is that you don't personally like the alternatives, because they don't give you an orgasm (you poor little thing) so to you, any type of behavior—no matter how useless and shitty—is justified if it gives you an orgasm, and also gives you a series of piddly benefits that aren't even remotely noticeable, and it doesn't matter if you can find those benefits elsewhere, because they don't give you an orgasm, and that totally outweighs everything else even though an unwanted pregnancy could literally destroy your entire life, depending on how you choose to handle it you see the struggle here i can't really argue with somebody who seems to think that orgasms are the be-all-end-all of leisure activity Quote I think you underestimate how important that kind of intimacy can be for bonding, building trust and maintaining a healthy relationship. If you've never experienced this, it's near impossible to really understand.the fact that you and i are biological organisms hardwired to reproduce is actually fairly simple to understand the ONLY REASON we love sex so much is because it provides us with an incentive to spread our genes, which is our one and only biological purpose—that's all it is our intelligence as a species has allowed us to rationalize our sex drive and form complex institutions and social contracts that give us further incentive to reproduce, and normalizes the process to the extent that people like me are fucked up for not wanting to reproduce and telling others not to >bonding >trust-building >maintaining a healthy relationship these are basically all just spooks—complex rationalizations of simple caveman behavior, all of which really fall apart when you sit down and actually think about them, because NEWSFLASH: it is very possible to bond, built trust, and maintain a healthy relationship without sex, and to engage in such a relationship is a sign of intellectual maturity the further we stray from our biological impulses, the better off we'll be 5183
Gaming / Re: Favorite Mario games?« on: November 13, 2017, 11:48:12 PM »
tl;dr
Top 5 Mario games: 1. World 2. Yoshi's Island 3. TTYD 4. Wario Land 3 5. Mario 3 5184
Gaming / Favorite Mario games?« on: November 13, 2017, 11:22:38 PM »
I have a bunch of reviews planned for the end of this year. I'm planning on covering:
Dark Souls (PS3) The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild (Wii U) Pokémon Gold & Silver (3DS VC) Shin Megami Tensei: Persona (PSP) Super Mario Odyssey (Switch) A lot of these will probably end up bleeding into 2018 (in fact, I can almost guarantee that Dark Souls will). But I've been playing a lot of Odyssey lately, and what's really cool about the game is that it feels like such a big celebration of the Mario franchise as a whole. It's filled to the brim with tasteful references to the classic games, yet it never feels gratuitous, masturbatory, or as if it's just pandering to nostalgia-blinded 30-somethings. It's a game that fills me with joy and excitement like I haven't felt for a Mario game since 2005, when I first played Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door, and it's inspired me to make a series of mini-reviews for every Mario game that I've beaten or played a substantial amount of, before I go all-out and make a full-fledged review of Odyssey some time in the next few weeks. I'll order them chronologically, and you guys can just talk about your personal favorite Mario games as well, assuming you have any. I can understand if you don't—I've been pretty jaded over this franchise for quite some time, but Odyssey has honestly rekindled some of my passion for it. Rating some of these older games /10 feels kind of disrespectful to their legacy, so instead, I'll give them stars (or asterisks) instead. That means they're all good, classic games in their own right—but the more stars I give a game, the more I personally enjoy it. I'll give up to three. Donkey Kong (1981, various platforms) To be perfectly honest, I was never really a huge fan of this timeless arcade classic. Its "competition" at the time consisted primarily of games like Pac-Man and Space Invaders, and of the three, I'll pick the latter two any day. There's just something about how sluggish and slow-paced this game feels that has always turned me away from it. Mario runs at a painfully grueling pace that's difficult for me to tolerate—and though he may have been called Jumpman, he wasn't exactly living up to it at the time. Your jumps have to be timed rather precisely to dodge those barrels, which would've meshed a lot better as a mechanic if the rest of the game wasn't so damn slow. And in this game, Mario can't take a fall for shit. He seriously cannot drop even one body height without dying, which can get pretty frustrating in 75m. The only reason I'd ever play it nowadays is to appreciate the iconic level design, and to see if I'm still capable of beating it without growing impatient with its archaic-ness. * Mario Bros. (1983, various platforms) Now, this game is a little bit better—though, if we're talking about old arcade games, I'd still much rather play Pac-Man. Either way, this is where the franchise really started to come into its own in terms of gameplay and overall aesthetic. It has pipes, POW Blocks, Shellcreepers, colorful graphics, and rudimentary platforming. Fortunately, Mario (and Luigi) don't feel nearly as sluggish to move this time around, and at this point, they've actually begun to develop their signature jumping skills. You still can't change your trajectory mid-arc, but in this game, it's honestly better that way. Being forced to commit to every single jump you make is an interesting relic of a gameplay mechanic that we don't really see too much of anymore in modern platformers, and it works fairly well here, even if it comes across as "early installment weirdness." The game itself is a simple and enjoyable little time waster, but of course, not exactly something I would spend more than twenty minutes at a time on. ** Wrecking Crew (1985, Wii VC) Really not into this one. It's an interesting and weird relic from Mario's history, and all, but I don't even really understand it, to be honest. All you do is break walls, then break more walls, and then break even more walls. It gets pretty fucking boring, and even if I try to immerse myself within the decade in which this was released, I'm hard-pressed to find anything very entertaining about it. That said, it DOES have a motherfucking level editor, a couple years after Lode Runner and Excitebike first did it, which is actually kind of amazing. If only the game was fun enough to justify tinkering around with that. * Super Mario Bros. (1985, NES) There's really nothing much I can say. Basically, if you consider yourself a fan of video games, or if you consider it a passion of yours, you MUST play this game at least once. This game is the reason your favorite game exists, no matter what it is. I think that should mean something to you. *** Super Mario Bros.: The Lost Levels (1985, Wii VC) The reason this game wasn't initially released outside of Japan is because they thought we'd be turned off by the intense difficulty, on top of the fact that the graphics haven't changed at all. The game is certainly much more challenging than the first, and almost deliberately so—I think Nintendo was aware that there were some hardcore players out there trying to beat SMB in all sorts of crazy ways, so they wanted to see what they'd be able to pull off in a more challenging game. Perhaps as a result of this, I personally don't find it nearly as fun, though I suppose it was worth trying out if you wanted something a little different. Not that anyone in America had the option back then, but still. ** Super Mario Bros. 2 (1988, NES) Though technically just a Doki Doki Panic reskin, it's fortunate that the two franchises were similar enough in tone that this weird marriage was able to take place. The coolest thing about the game is the ability to choose between four characters—Mario, Luigi, Toad, and Toadstool, complete with their own unique stats and abilities—and it inadvertently introduced some of Mario's most iconic enemies: Shy Guys, Bob-ombs, and Pokeys. The game itself is kinda fucking wonky, and even as a kid, I could kinda tell that something was a little "off" about it. When I eventually discovered the truth about the game, I was like, "Yeah, that makes sense." I could never quite beat it—whether it's because I sucked, or the game is just genuinely difficult, I'm not too sure. In any case, I don't really have a strong desire to revisit this one any time soon. It never really left a strong impression on me. ** Super Mario Bros. 3 (1988, NES) One of the best games that the NES has to offer. It may not be my personal favorite Mario game, but it's definitely up there for me—and for many people, this is the definitive Mario title. Amazing level design, excellent music, eight beautiful worlds, and strong, addicting, and overall rock-solid gameplay. Not to mention, it's at this point in the series where the franchise's signature charm and personality really starts to shine through. There's so many little touches here and there that make it obvious that the game was made with love, and it's just an absolute joy to pick up and play, even after all this time. *** I'll go back to rating games out of 10 now. I think the year 1990 is a good cutoff for that. Super Mario World (1990, SNES) My third favorite video game of all time. It practically embodies my childhood. Basically, take all the praise I just gave out to SMB3 and amp it up to 11 or 12. It's fucking incredible, and perhaps nearly perfect. Very few other platformers have come close. I have to play it at least once a year. 10/10 Mario Paint (1992, SNES) Probably the coolest and most memorable art-making games I've ever played. The game requires this very odd mouse-like peripheral in order to play it, and the one we ordered online wasn't functioning properly, so I was never able to play this game to its fullest extent. It has The feature that everybody remembers is the music composer, though, and that's the one I tried to play the most. You've probably seen lots of Mario Paint Composer clips on YouTube, which is an emulated and modified version of this module, but let me tell you—it's not nearly as charming without seeing Mario hop on each and every note as the song plays. I wish music composing software made the entire process as simple and as easy as this game, where you're physically placing notes exactly where you want them to be, instead of fidgeting around with weird knobs and shit. 8/10 Donkey Kong Country (1994, SNES) Yeah, yeah, I know—this isn't a Mario game, but I've always considered the Donkey Kong franchise (as well as the Yoshi and Wario franchises) to be part of the overall Mario canon, so fuck it, I'm just gonna include it here. The game's 3D-rendered graphics, while revolutionary at the time, may look a little bit goofy and dated nowadays, but I still think it's one of the better looking games on the SNES. What has really aged is the gameplay and level design, which is not exactly the best. Everything feels so random and haphazard, and some levels honestly feel like they were designed by a three-year-old. It still has a ton of personality, though, and David Wise really made a name for himself with the music for this game. It's one of the best soundtracks ever. 7/10 (or 8/10, it's hard to decide) Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island (1995, SNES) Currently, this is my first contender for becoming my fourth 10/10 game. I don't think it's 10/10 just yet, but I'm planning on replaying it very soon, and when I do, I'll be able to determine if it truly deserves that rating. As it stands, this is another one of the best video games ever made. Again, it's kind of weird to consider it a Mario game, since most people consider it a Yoshi game—but we'll disregard that for the time being. The gameplay is out of this world. The level design is stellar, and not only is there a billion of them, they're ALL extremely unique and beautifully, meticulously crafted. Visually, I think this is definitely the most gorgeous game on the SNES, with Super Metroid running a close second. Even the premise is ingenious—they could've made it yet another damsel in distress story, but instead, they got a little creative and said, "Let's make Mario an innocent baby, and let's make it so Yoshi has to help him reunite with his lost brother from whom he was separated!" I don't know, something about that really resonates with me. It's brilliant. I might even like it more than Super Mario World, but I'll have to play it again and see. You should play it yourself, too, if you just want to play a god-tier platformer. 9/10 Super Mario 64 (1996, N64) This is where I start to diverge from popular opinion—I do not like this game, at all. For many people, this is their favorite game, but for me, this is probably one of my least favorite Mario games. After World and Yoshi's Island, both of which rocked my socks, this honestly felt like the biggest step down of all time. And while I'm not one to care about a game's graphics, I do care a lot about visuals. There's a difference. A game can have "bad graphics" from a technical standpoint and still look gorgeous. Just look at Mario 3, which STILL looks great. Mario 64, on the other hand, is ugly as sin. I'm well-aware that 3D technology was super new at the time, because I was alive during a time when there wasn't much anything better. But even when I was six years old, I thought this game looked like shit. It literally makes my eyeballs sore just from looking at it. But don't worry, that's definitely not the only thing I dislike about it—the gameplay itself took a pretty huge nosedive, too. We've gone from simply platforming linearly from level to level to a mind-numbingly boring collectathon where you perform a series of menial (and increasingly tedious) tasks to collect a certain number of Power Stars in order to visit other worlds—Worlds that become difficult to navigate because of the game's janky controls and abysmal camera, which may be one of the worst cameras in gaming history. It's not all bad, though—Mario himself controls quite fluidly, and mastering all of his acrobatic movement options is quite fun and satisfying. The music is great, and the Mario charm is still very much there—even if it feels slightly diluted by the terrible, ugly, soullessly textured worlds. It also happens to be one of the coolest games to watch speedruns of. It's kinda funny how the best way to play this game is to figure out how to play the absolute least of it. All that being said, most of my issues with the game have been solved with the DS port, which adds more playable characters, fun minigames, and polishes the game to a much higher standard—but even then, it's still not what I'd call a great game, because I fundamentally dislike collecting Power Stars in a big poorly-designed world. 4/10 Mario Kart 64 (1996, N64) In general, I hate Mario Kart. This is probably my least favorite one, if only because all the other games in the series are just better in every way. It's been completely obsolesced by every single future installment, so there's pretty much no reason to play this game other than for nostalgia, or if you just really like the tracks for some reason (even though most of the better ones are featured in all the later games, too). 5/10 Super Smash Bros. (1999, N64) This game is fun. Pure, unadulterated fun. The premise is every Nintendo-loving kid's wet dream. It was made on an extremely low budget, which explains the terrible music, models, and overall lack of polish—but even with those flaws, it still manages to be an incredibly solid and extremely important game. I'm glad I played Melee first, though. 7/10 Wario Land 3 (2000, GBC) Play this game. It's one of the most underrated platforming gems ever made. It's absurdly creative and well-crafted. If you don't know what you're doing, it's actually rather punishing—but if you're patient, and you can appreciate the game's deranged sense of humor, you won't be able to put it down. Top 10 Game Boy Color games, easily. That's all I'm going to say. 9/10 Super Smash Bros. Melee (2001, NGC) I cannot express to you in one short paragraph just how important this game is to me, so I won't try. Instead, I'll just reiterate that this is in my top 5. When you consider its sheer entertainment value—its capacity to be the ultimate game NOT ONLY for parties and casual play, but also high-octane competitive tournament play—how could it not be one of the greatest games of all time? Poor character balance is the only thing preventing this game from being a 10/10 in my eyes. 9/10 WarioWare, Inc.: Mega Microgames! (2003, GBA) For how goofy and impenetrable it is, it's actually extremely addicting, but like Mario Kart 64, it's been superseded by almost every other installment in the franchise—most notably, Twisted! It's still worth playing if you haven't before, though. Just be prepared for a wild sugar rush of crazy shit. 7/10 Wario World (2003, NGC) I feel like I should replay this, since I haven't touched it several years. I remember thoroughly enjoying it back when I was a kid, but it feels like one of those games that I only would've enjoyed as a kid. I could be wrong, but I've grown to dislike beat-'em-up style games in my teen years, and I don't much care for them in my adulthood, either. I also seem to recall it having some icky collectathon elements, even if they weren't overblown. I'm open to replaying it, but the only question is when. 6/10 Mario Kart: Double Dash!! (2003, NGC) This seems to be everyone's favorite Mario Kart. As someone who's not a fan of this series in general, I think it's okay. There's some really cool tracks on it, and the double/signature item gimmicks are pretty cool and interesting. The game still suffers from feeling obsolete, because every Mario Kart game tends to invalidate everything that came before it. I also wish I could pair up the characters myself, but that's just me. 6/10 Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door (2004, NGC) The only Mario RPG you ever really need to try. It's probably the most text-heavy game in the entire franchise, and there are certain elements of the game that feel distinctly Japanese and un-Mario-like (owing to the fact that the same people who made Fire Emblem made this), but I wouldn't let either of those two things distract you from the amazing gameplay, wonderful characters, compelling story (for Mario, at least), and great sense of humor. This is a top 10 GameCube game, if not top 5. 9/10 WarioWare: Twisted! (2004, GBA) The best WarioWare game, in my opinion. The gyroscope gimmick is really cute, and they do a lot of insanely creative stuff with it. It's also unexpectedly jam-packed with content and shit to unlock, and I'm not ashamed to admit that I probably put at least a hundred hours into it when I still played it. 8/10 New Super Mario Bros. (2006, DS) Generic. Bland. Soulless. Boring. These are the only words that come to mind when I attempt to describe what is one of the more disappointing 2D platformers in the series, and the beginning of a downward spiral where my interest in the franchise seems to almost dwindle into nothingness. 5/10 WarioWare: Smooth Moves (2006, Wii) If you play this, I would suggest playing it alone. Some of the movements the game asks you to do will make you look like a complete jackass, unless you're absolutely shameless. If you hate motion controls, stay away. It's the most wagglin' Wii game on the system, and it's PROUD of it. 7/10 Mario Party 8 (2007, Wii) Actually, I changed my mind—THIS is the most wagglin' Wii game of all time. It's definitely a tossup between the two, at least. This also happens to be the Mario Party game I've played the most, and it might be my personal favorite—if only because it's the one that lets you play as a Blooper. If you love motion controls, it has the best minigames. If you hate motion controls, it has the worst minigames. Take it or leave it. 7/10 Mario Party DS (2007, DS) I've never been able to play this in a group, but if I ever get an opportunity to, I can see this one becoming my favorite. 7/10 Super Smash Bros. Brawl (2008, DS) I've really come to hate this game over the years for reasons that are far too plentiful to list here. Basically, take everything that made Melee so fucking good and just suck it ALL away. Sakurai can shove Subspace Emissary up his casual-pandering ass for this. 4/10 Mario Kart Wii (2008, Wii) This game is the reason why I'm an atheist. 5/10 New Super Mario Bros. Wii (2009, Wii) More vapid, soulless trash. What I thought was the nail in the coffin for my love of this series. 5/10 Mario Kart 8 (2014, Switch) I played the Deluxe version for the Switch, and it's the first Mario Kart game that not only didn't make me want to kill myself, but the first and only one where I actually cared to achieve 100% completion on it. I'm not sure what it is, but it was a fun time. It's easily the most polished game in the series on top of having the best selection of tracks and characters (which, in Deluxe, have all been unlocked from the start except for one). I honestly wouldn't have liked the game nearly as much if I played it when it first came out on the Wii U. 8/10 Super Smash Bros. for Wii U and Nintendo 3DS (2014, Wii U/3DS) Beats Brawl, but still too casual. As such, I prefer it on 3DS. Smash Run is super addicting. Fuck Bayonetta and anyone who voted for her. 8/10 Super Mario Odyssey (2017, Switch) I can't give my full opinion yet, but I'm thoroughly enjoying myself so far. ?/10 Games I've played, but not a substantial amount of: Donkey Kong Jr. (1982, various platforms) Super Mario Land (1989, GB) Dr. Mario (1990, NES) Yoshi (1991, NES) Super Mario Kart (1992, SNES) Yoshi's Cookie (1992, NES) Wario's Woods (1994, SNES) Mario's Tennis (1995, VB) Mario Clash (1995, VB) Virtual Boy Wario Land (1995, VB) Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy's Kong Quest (1995, SNES) Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars (1996, SNES) Game & Watch Gallery (1997, GB) Game & Watch Gallery 2 (1997, GB) Mario Party (1998, N64) Game & Watch Gallery 3 (1999, GBC) Paper Mario (2000, N64) Mario Tennis (2000, N64) Mario Party 3 (2000, N64) Super Mario Sunshine (2002, NGC) Mario Party 4 (2002, NGC) Game & Watch Gallery 4 (2002, GBA) Mario Party 5 (2003, NGC) Mario Party 6 (2004, NGC) Mario Party 7 (2005, NGC Mario Kart DS (2005, DS) Super Paper Mario (2007, Wii) Super Mario Galaxy (2007, Wii) Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games (2007, Wii) Mario Super Sluggers (2008, Wii) Donkey Kong Country Returns (2010, Wii) Games I've never played: '80s Greenhouse (1982, G&W) Donkey Kong II (1983, G&W) Donkey Kong 3 (1983, various platforms) Mario's Cement Factory (1983, G&W) Mario's Bombs Away (1983, G&W) Donkey Kong Jr. Math (1983, NES) Pinball (1984, NES) Golf (1984, NES) Mario Bros. Special (1984, NEC PC-8801) Punch Ball Mario Bros. (1984, NEC PC-8801) Donkey Kong Circus (1984, G&W) Donkey Kong Hockey (1984, G&W) VS. Wrecking Crew (1984, Arcade) Super Mario Bros. Special (1986, NEC PC-8801) VS. Super Mario Bros. (1986, Arcade) All Night Nippon Super Mario Bros. (1986, Famicom) I Am a Teacher: Super Mario Sweater (1986, Famicom) Famicom Grand Prix: F-1 Race (1987, Famicom) Yume Kōjō: Doki Doki Panic (1987, Famicom) Famicom Grand Prix II: 3D Hot Rally (1988, Famicom) Kaettekita Mario Bros. (1988, Famicom) Alleyway (1989, GB) '90s Mario Roulette (1991, Arcade) Super Mario Bros. & Friends: When I Grow Up (1991, DOS) NES Open Tournament Golf (1991, NES) Mario the Juggler (1991, G&W) Mario Teaches Typing (1991, DOS) Super Mario Bros. Print World (1991, DOS) Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins (1992, GB) Mario is Missing! (1992, DOS) Mario Undoukai (1993, Arcade) Yoshi's Safari (1993, SNES) Mario & Wario (1993, SNES) Mario's Time Machine (1993, DOS) Yoshi no Cookie: Kuruppon Oven de Cookie (1994, Super Famicom) Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3 (1994, GB) Wario Blast: Featuring Bomberman! (1994, GB) Mario's Early Years! Fun with Letters (1994, SNES) Mario's Early Years! Fun with Numbers (1994, SNES) Mario's Early Years! Preschool Fun (1994, SNES) Hotel Mario (1994, CD-i) Undake30 Same Game (1995, Super Famicom) Mario's Picross (1995, GB) Donkey Kong Land (1995, GB) Mario's Super Picross (1995, SNES) Satella-Q (1995, Super Famicom) Tetris Attack (1996, SNES) Donkey Kong Land 2 (1996, GB) Picross 2 (1996, GB) Donkey Kong Country 3: Dixie Kong's Double Trouble! (1996, SNES) Mario Teaches Typing 2 (1997, PC) Excitebike: Bun Bun Mario Battle Stadium (1997, Super Famicom) Donkey Kong Land III (1997, GB) Diddy Kong Racing (1997, N64) Yoshi's Story (1997, N64) Wrecking Crew '98 (1998, Super Famicom) Mario's FUNdamentals (1998, DOS) Wario Land II (1998, GBC) Mario no Photopi (1998, N64) Mario Golf (1999, N64) Donkey Kong 64 (1999, N64) Mario Artist: Paint Studio (1999, N64DD) Mario Party 2 (1999, N64) '00s Mario Artist: Talent Studio (2000, N64DD) Mario Artist: Communication Kit (2000, N64DD) Mario Artist: Polygon Studio (2000, N64DD) Dr. Mario 64 (2000, N64) Mobile Golf (2001, GBC) Mario Kart: Super Circuit (2001, GBA) Wario Land 4 (2001, GBA) Mario Family (2001, GBC) Luigi's Mansion (2001, NGC) Super Mario Fushigi no Janjan Land (2003, Arcade) Mario Party-e (2003, GBA) Mario Golf: Toadstool Tour (2003, NGC) WarioWare, Inc.: Mega Party Games! (2003, NGC) Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga (2003, GBA) Donkey Konga (2003, NGC) Mario Golf: Advance Tour (2004, GBA) Mario vs. Donkey Kong (2004, GBA) Donkey Konga 2 (2004, GBA) Mario Pinball Land (2004, GBA) Mario Power Tennis (2004, NGC) WarioWare: Touched! (2004, DS) Yoshi Topsy-Turvy (2004, GBA) Donkey Kong Jungle Beat (2004, NGC) Donkey Kong: Jungle Fever (2005, Arcade) Mario Party Advance (2005, GBA) NBA Street V3 (2005, NGC) Yoshi Touch & Go (2005, DS) DK: King of Swing (2005, GBA) Donkey Konga 3: Tabehōdai! Haru Mogitate 50 Kyoku (2005, NGC) Yakuman DS (2005, GBA) Dance Dance Revolution: Mario Mix (2005, NGC) Mario Superstar Baseball (2005, NGC) Mario Tennis: Power Tour (2005, NGC) Mario Kart Arcade GP (2005, Arcade) SSX on Tour (2005, NGC) Super Princess Peach (2005, DS) Super Mario Strikers (2005, NGC) Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time (2005, DS) Tetris DS (2006, DS) Mario Hoops 3-on-3 (2006, DS) Mario vs. Donkey Kong 2: March of the Minis (2006, DS) Yoshi's Island DS (2006, DS) Donkey Kong: Banana Kingdom (2006, Arcade) Wario: Master of Disguise (2007, DS) Diddy Kong Racing DS (2007, DS) Mario Kart Arcade GP 2 (2007, Arcade) Mario Strikers Charged (2007, Wii) Itadaki Street DS (2007, DS) Donkey Kong Barrel Blast (2007, Wii) DK: Jungle Climber (2007, DS) Dr. Mario Online Rx (2008, Wii) Wario Land: Shake It! (2008, Wii) Captain Rainbow (2008, Wii) Dr. Mario Express (2008, DSi) WarioWare: Snapped! (2008, DSi) Bird & Beans (2008, DSi) Paper Airplane Chase (2008, DSi) Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story (2009, DS) WarioWare: D.I.Y. (2009, DS) Mario Calculator (2009, DSi) Mario Clock (2009, DSi) Mario vs. Donkey Kong: Minis March Again! (2009, DSi) Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Winter Games (2009, Wii) '10s Super Mario Galaxy 2 (2010, Wii) Mario vs. Donkey Kong: Mini-Land Mayhem! (2010, DS) Mario Sports Mix (2010, Wii) New Super Mario Bros. Wii Coin World (2011, Arcade) Super Mario 3D Land (2011, 3DS) Mario & Sonic at the London 2012 Olympic Games (2011, Wii) Fortune Street (2011, Wii) Mario Kart 7 (2011, 3DS) Mario Party 9 (2012, Wii) Mario Tennis Open (2012, 3DS) New Super Mario Bros. 2 (2012, 3DS) Paper Mario: Sticker Star (2012, 3DS) New Super Mario Bros. U (2012, Wii U) Nintendo Land (2012, Wii U) Luigi's Mansion: Dark Moon (2013, 3DS) Game & Wario (2013, Wii U) Mario and Donkey Kong: Minis on the Move (2013, 3DS) New Super Luigi U (2013, Wii U) Mario & Luigi: Dream Team (2013, 3DS) Mario Kart Arcade GP DX (2013, Arcade) Mario & Sonic at the Sochi 2014 Olympic Winter Games (2013, Wii U) Super Mario 3D World (2013, Wii U) Mario Party: Island Tour (2013, 3DS) NES Remix (2013, Wii U) Dr. Luigi (2013, Wii U) Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze (2014, Wii U) Yoshi's New Island (2014, 3DS) NES Remix 2 (2014, Wii U) Mario Golf: World Tour (2014, 3DS) Ultimate NES Remix (2014, 3DS) Captain Toad: Treasure Tracker (2014, Wii U) Mario vs. Donkey Kong: Tipping Stars (2015, Wii U) Mario Party 10 (2015, Wii U) Puzzle & Dragons: Super Mario Bros. Edition (2015, 3DS) Dr. Mario: Miracle Cure (2015, 3DS) Rhythm Heaven Megamix (2015, 3DS) Yoshi's Woolly World (2015, Wii U) Super Mario Maker (2015, Wii U) Skylanders: SuperChargers (2015, Wii U) Mario Tennis: Ultra Smash (2015, Wii U) Mario & Luigi: Paper Jam (2015, 3DS) Mini Mario & Friends: amiibo Challenge (2016, Wii U) Mario & Sonic at the Rio 2016 Olympic Games (2016, Wii U) Paper Mario: Color Splash (2016, Wii U) Mario Party: Star Rush (2016, 3DS) Super Mario Run (2016, Mobile) Poochy & Yoshi's Woolly World (2017, 3DS) Mario Sports Superstars (2017, 3DS) Mario Kart Arcade GP VR (2017, Arcade) Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle (2017, Switch) 5185
Gaming / Re: EA BF2 response becomes the most downvoted Reddit comment ever« on: November 13, 2017, 04:13:29 PM »
heroes were all the fun i could have in that horrible horrible game
5186
The Flood / Re: The Prestige« on: November 13, 2017, 02:06:29 PM »and then denis villeneuve has that dune movie in the works, apparentlyHe said he was (him and his brother) a couple of years ago. The wait makes it feel like it got quietly canned, but I'm holding out hope.Nolan is directing a Foundation miniseries?it's aightDunkirk is fantastic. Nolan's use of time in film is precisely why I'm still excited for the eventual Foundation miniseries. what a time to be alive for you nerds 5187
The Flood / Re: Here’s a word which you liberals will never understand« on: November 13, 2017, 01:47:09 PM »
but liberals understand that word more than anybody
they also understand that it's overrated 5188
The Flood / Re: The Prestige« on: November 13, 2017, 01:40:27 PM »hmm, still need to see itit's aightDunkirk is fantastic. Nolan's use of time in film is precisely why I'm still excited for the eventual Foundation miniseries. also i keep thinking you're loaf with that avatar 5189
Serious / Re: Gunmen kills 27, injures 20+ in Texas church« on: November 11, 2017, 07:59:04 PM »you realize this is actually making fun of conservatives, right and how obtuse they are regarding this issue like i get that you're just a persona/alt or whatever, but do you at least realize that 5190
The Flood / Re: so i guess i unironically like X now« on: November 11, 2017, 04:38:22 PM »jamaicanIs he Dominican or something? Tentacion like how you say it in Spanish? Kinda weird but alrightHow do you pronounce the name?ecks ecks ecks tentación or triple-x tentación |