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Messages - Ian
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4171
« on: December 25, 2016, 08:26:20 PM »
Twas The Night Before Christmas, when all through the house,
One asshole was stirring, Ol' Ricky The Louse.
Ricky broke in, and not for a snack....
But to steal presents, that he could then sell for crack.
The Smith family slept, all tucked in their bed.
Too cheap for alarms, that would alert them to dread.
Mommy and Daddy passed out from the 'nog,
And Timmy hotboxed his room, he's asleep in a fog.
So Ricky opened gifts, when what did he see?
A Tiffany ring, with a diamond....or three.
"Holy fuck" whispered Ricky, "What a hell of a score!"
Ricky pocketed the box, and kept looking for more.
When all of a sudden, a sound on the lawn!
"What the fuck was that?", Ricky said, his shiv was now drawn.
Carefully to the window, he snuck just a peek.
"A sleigh? And some deer? Fuck, I'm startin' to tweak!"
"No you're not, little Ricky, I can assure you of that!"
"Now return that gift or you'll wear you ass as a hat!"
Ricky spun and slashed, but hit nothing but air.
"You'll have to be faster to cut ol' St Nick's hair!"
Before him stood Santa, as fat as he's tall.
"Fuck you old man, you don't scare me at all!"
"You're just some guy in a suit, you think you're a hero?"
"I'll slice out your heart, you fat fucking queer'bo!"
Santa just laughed, and assumed a fighting stance.
"Come on motherfucker, you want some? Let's dance!"
Ricky dove with his shiv, but was caught by surprise,
Santa sidestepped and landed a fist to the eyes.
Ricky was mad, he jumped up in a hurry,
He swung and he swung, his blade just a flurry.
But Santa was calm, he waited for him to slash,
He grabbed Ricky's wrist, and broke his right arm in a flash.
"Jesus Christ!" Ricky cried as he dropped to one knee,
"What in the fuck do you want from me?!"
"I fucking hate thieves, and on Christmas, you prick?"
"Stealing presents is like taking direct from St Nick."
Santa leaned down to grab the ring from his coat,
And that's when Ricky swung for the throat.
Using his left, he'd recovered the blade,
And dug it in deep...Santa couldn't evade.
"Take that you old bitch, guess Christmas is canceled!"
"The legendary Santa Claus...fucking dismantled!"
But Ricky's gloating soon turned to shock,
As Santa removed the blade, laughed and said "Suck my cock."
"You can't kill me, I'm fucking immortal!"
"Now say goodnight Ricky, this B&E was your downfall!"
Santa grabbed Ricky, and like he was nothing,
And tossed his ass through the window...now this next part's disgusting.
"Ricky, this is a situation I could have diffused,"
"But you had to stab Santa, and that wont be excused."
Into his sleigh for some rope he did reach,
And he tied Ricky's limbs to a reindeer each.
Ricky begged and he pleaded one last time not to die.
"I promise I'll change! No word of a lie!"
"This is one Naughty List that I will not revise!"
"Now pray to your God...you'll be seeing him nigh!"
"On Dancer, On Dasher, On Prancer, On Cupid!"
"Let's Quarter this Fucker for being so stupid!"
The Reindeer, they ran in opposing directions,
Until Ricky was torn into four separate sections.
The ring was rewrapped and placed under the tree,
And Santa was off, but not before one last decree:
"This could all have been avoided if you'd just dropped the knife..."
"Merry Christmas you Cunt...I just ended your life!"
Fin
4172
« on: December 25, 2016, 05:21:34 PM »
Master Grade Strike Noir Gundam Ooooohhh which kit?
4173
« on: December 25, 2016, 01:11:30 PM »
Code Geass seasons 1 & 2 on Bluray.
Legend of Korra seasons 1 & 2 on Bluray.
FFXV limited edition OST.
A Master Grade Gunpla model kit.
Some cash and Longhorn gift card.
Going to see Rogue One again and go to Hooters for dinner.
Best Christmas EVAR.
4174
« on: December 24, 2016, 07:57:13 PM »
Star Ocean: The Last Hope International
4175
« on: December 24, 2016, 03:41:13 PM »
When all the cucked Remain voters finally leave for good. Second British Empire when?
4176
« on: December 23, 2016, 06:23:38 PM »
If I wanted a Grind-heavy MMO I'd go back to Toontown Rewritten. Pro-tip, you can't.
4177
« on: December 23, 2016, 04:48:51 AM »
Private companies that sell to the government are known to mark up prices just because they know the US government generally gives them blank checks. This might do a small amount of good for the tax payer's dollar. It seems a bit ironic that the genius business man just made a business lose a massive amount of money.
I imagine they're not happy
4178
« on: December 22, 2016, 08:10:54 PM »
I can't really do that considering their second major site update removed saved threads that weren't created by you. I lost a good amount of funny archived moments. Im looking through old posts and having all kinds of feels ;_;
4180
« on: December 22, 2016, 08:07:37 PM »
Only if you're interested in Becoming Legend tm. I made a thread a while back in the Gaming "Forum" asking if people wanted to group up for FFXIV, and I was told to go to the Square Enix forums by Destiny players because they felt that recruitment in the Gaming "Forum" should only be reserved for recruiting in Destiny. This was before the Recruitment "Forum" mind you. I never did and still don't care about or enjoy discussing politics or real issues, as long as people talk about videogames and entertainment that's all that matters. Do the people there at least do that?
4181
« on: December 22, 2016, 07:51:14 PM »
Remind her that Marx was a poor piece of shit that blamed capitalism for his shitty financial choices.
4182
« on: December 22, 2016, 07:50:03 PM »
Sorry, I fixed it now. The funny thing is I accidentally had both say "Of" originally and fixed one of them thinking it was the right one. I see now that I just made the mistake worse, eheheheheheh...... fucking hell this annoyed me more than it should have
4183
« on: December 22, 2016, 07:00:26 PM »
As stated in the other thread, my feelings towards this is summed up in only two words:
Good riddance.
4184
« on: December 22, 2016, 06:09:11 PM »
The only good thing that occurs from an opening shift is I sometimes get to grab a Chicken Biscuit for breakfast on the way to work. Chick fil a has some quality chicken sandies.
4185
« on: December 22, 2016, 01:37:23 PM »
Malts are just wannabe shakes.
4186
« on: December 22, 2016, 01:18:49 PM »
Wow, looks like fucking Dazarobbo finally stopped his blind run of power if all these posts aren't getting shadow banned.
However, no matter what they do it will only be described as: Too little too late. Good riddance to that shit hole and the company that turned it into what we see now. The excuse of "Influx of new users" can suck a hot dick, the way the forums operated before 2013 was perfectly fine, then they had to go and fuck it all up. Politics and Religion are the two topics you don't bring to a social gathering which is nothing more than what a forum is. At least here on Sep7 the right idea was used to have it fucking contained (albeit even if it's not really enforced). But there's no excuse on Bungie's part. The community you see now Flee is a direct result of Bungie's shitty decisions when continually updating the site from 2013 on wards.
We can only hope that Destiny starts to falter and humbles Bungie back into what drew us to them in the first place, but I feel the damage is already done.
4187
« on: December 22, 2016, 12:59:38 PM »
What he said may be silly but this Parker Molloy bitch is a fucking crybaby.
>Probably a butthurt SJW that went on Trump's Twitter just to find something to bitch about
>Proceeds to spam her own feed with one comment he made
Good riddance to Twitter.
4188
« on: December 22, 2016, 10:34:35 AM »
Caring about the shittiest Jedi ever next to fucking Ahsoka. I hope those Clones that killed Aayla Secura got raped by Droidekas
4189
« on: December 21, 2016, 09:01:06 PM »
Good riddance.
4190
« on: December 21, 2016, 03:22:31 PM »
Do you want me to say Marty Stu instead? Don't do this.
4191
« on: December 21, 2016, 03:20:10 PM »
Godwin's Law at its finest. and then have it somehow turn into something along the lines of "technically Hitler wasn't even socialist and fascism is completely left wing while anarchism is extreme right you fucking dumb piece of shit, tell me where the fuck you live and I'll murder your family" in under 10 comments.
4192
« on: December 21, 2016, 03:18:26 PM »
Many do it just to reference the cultural history the original film had, especially since a lot of movie posters before ESB simply had it labeled "Star Wars". Anyone who does reference it as such without giving the same type of history lesson is of course probably doing it to feel authentic like Verb said. >when people in their 20s refer to ANH as simply "Star Wars"
i bet you feel so fucking authentic
People do this? Just saying "Star Wars" in reference to one movie is way too vague.
4193
« on: December 21, 2016, 03:16:47 PM »
Try giving this a read. Half his explanation (Such as Rey's childhood and Luke's lightsaber) is based off stuff that has no sources. All you gotta do on Jakku is pick up parts left over from the war and turn them in for food. I can make claims about her childhood too since we have no official source on it. I can say that the Star Destroyer had no other scavengers around it so most of her survival came easily from being the only one taking shit from it and scrapping it for food. Point is, until we get a more fleshed out backstory, her skills and assets are seemingly out of the blue. Luke's lightsaber having a will of its own? That's pretty far fetched even with the visions she gets from touching it. Nothing else in the entire universe (even the balls to the walls crazy EU) has something like this. Not a fair comparison, because that's movie #2 of the OT. TFA is movie #1, so it's only reasonable to compare Rey to the Luke we know from ANH. Where he displayed some Mary Sue-like tendencies as well--on top of being an annoying brat. He missed a lot of his blaster shots, gets hit by a training sphere (only hitting it after Ben's guidance), the skills he does have are actually explained from his farming days (shooting with a vehicle on a moisture farm is the same as making a shot on the trench run for example), and he was only able to pull off the final hit on the Death Star with the force and would;ve missed had it not been for Ben's space ghost. Your article also tries to point out Anakin being an easy ace pilot in episode I for an example of piloting being easy, yet Anakin was a Gary Stu as well.
4194
« on: December 21, 2016, 02:09:29 PM »
Rey is not a Mary Sue, let alone a "total" one. From Wikipedia: A Mary Sue is an idealized and seemingly perfect fictional character, a young or low-rank person who saves the day through unrealistic abilities >She is incredibly adapt at the force despite having zero training (Her connection to the Skywalker family if there even is one is meaningless as Luke still needed some guidance from Ben) to the point of being able to mind trick a stormtrooper despite zero experience in doing such. >Manages to save Finn from tentacle rape with knowledge of the stations door controls despite never being on such a ship and only wandering for broken scraps of metal all her life. >Can go toe to toe with Kylo Ren in a lightsaber duel despite having never used a lightsaber before and Kylo was trained by Luke fucking Skywalker, the only hero in the OT that bested Vader. I like Rey, don't get me wrong. But damn is she the fucking female Jesus of the new trilogy. At least Luke fucking sucked at everything in IV except for making the torpedo shot in the end and got fucking destroyed by Vader in V. I hate how Wookieepedia defaults to the Legends section and not the Canon section when looking shit up there.
bitter EU fags die In their defense, Disney's termination of existing canon was really poorly done. The EU had books on how an entire Star Destroyer or the Death Star operated, and now considered "Non-canon". How does a Star Destroyer operate now? Fucking space magic until Disney releases an "Official" source for it. But they wont because that's not something that's going to make them two billion dollars. They only brought Thrawn back he's popular enough to make money and even then they had to butcher him and remove the glowing non-pupil eyes, that was a menacing feature part of his character. They'll probably remove Outbound Flight from his new book too. The problem is there's a lot of stuff in the EU that can still work with the new canon, and wont get a new "Official" version, so axing it was pointless.
4195
« on: December 21, 2016, 11:30:16 AM »
$150, I only got stuff for my mom and sister. Me and my brother wait until after Christmas to get each other stuff because then we have the money for some more.
Luckily I saved almost another $150 cause both my mom and sister love Disney and I get a 40% discount until February.
4196
« on: December 21, 2016, 10:59:45 AM »
I give Angry Birds a pass because it upset butthurt SJW parents with its Nationalist message. But Trolls and Emojis shows no signs of doing this. I think you underestimate the power of idiotic children.
4197
« on: December 21, 2016, 10:58:01 AM »
The only change that bothered me in RoTJ. The silence was important, it was supposed to show Vader's internal conflict and how hard it was. Having that "No" just completely threw it all out.
4198
« on: December 21, 2016, 10:53:54 AM »
Reminder: December 23 there will be new information regarding Stormblood and on Midnight for Christmas Eve they will have a new Live Letter for patch 3.5.
4199
« on: December 21, 2016, 10:46:46 AM »
It's like Sony wants to go bankrupt.
4200
« on: December 20, 2016, 09:53:47 PM »
Both of them are pretty cute, but they each have glaring flaws; one being boring as sin and the other a total Mary Sue. She wasn't even that cute.
I personally thought Rey was cuter in a nerdy sort of way.
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