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Messages - Sandtrap
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9061
« on: December 09, 2014, 09:43:01 AM »
Maybe I might sound racist, but most of the inmates appear to be of color... What's going on with that?
Colour attraction. Stick a candle in a dark room and all eyes fall on the candle. The coloured folks stand out more in their efforts because they have a feature that marks them as different. People, all people, even news folks and reviewers and stuff like that, seem to have a subconscious habit of doing that. Focusing on the one that stands out.
9062
« on: December 09, 2014, 09:39:57 AM »
Okay. Interesting question. I'll talk about efficiency here I guess. Because I've been on both sides of the fence. 9th grade education here.
Personally, organised teaching is more efficient. It's efficient, in that it's a train track. You start on one end, and you go to the other. There are no bumps, twists, or turns. It's all organised and fine tuned to a path to follow. But it's rigid.
Self engineered education is less efficient. Because it's not a train track. It's a road. It has bumps. Ups and downs, twists and turns. Your self education is defined by your motivation, your own intelligence, and your emotional state. And there are some days where your studies hit a brick wall. Or you face a problem that takes time to figure out on your own.
If you drag preference into the equation, I go for self taught, any day.
And I suppose, since you first asked, whether or not it was possible to pursue higher education outside of a sytem, I think it is. You've always got all the tools at your disposal. You just need to look in the right spots.
9063
« on: December 09, 2014, 09:26:16 AM »
9064
« on: December 09, 2014, 09:25:57 AM »
 Also, this seems like it's a flight bound for the serious board. No extra service charges, I promise.
9065
« on: December 09, 2014, 09:22:26 AM »
Dustin My Chimney
9066
« on: December 09, 2014, 09:19:42 AM »
They're people. Rehabilitation is far better than going to a shithole then coming out and living the same lifestyle.
That's true. But at the same time that's a fair point. Go to jail, but get all the perks of learning what you want without having to fight the system for it? It's not so much a flaw or a mistake to try and get people to straighten up their act in prison. Because some people can straighten out. But the fact that simply being in prison grants you access to those resources where people who aren't in prison have to struggle and fight every step of the way means that something is fucked.
9067
« on: December 09, 2014, 07:17:24 AM »
Speak the forbidden word, zesty.
Meta Cognition? Is this a summoning ritual?
9068
« on: December 08, 2014, 11:45:42 PM »
I don't need sad right now Chalk. Also. Your advice about food?  Tasty food makes you more likely to throw shit up.
9069
« on: December 08, 2014, 11:43:21 PM »
Is it possible to have truly original ideas?
A point I was going to make. People are inspired by things. Everything plays a part in our ideas. And therefore, no idea is technically original because it has a base and foundation in something else. Ideas can be new. But not original. Not completely.
9070
« on: December 08, 2014, 11:13:59 PM »
9071
« on: December 08, 2014, 11:05:38 PM »
I won't abandon the thread but I will go down with the ship.
Because the ship is fixed.
If you can fix a boat then you can fix a tumor. Chop chop!
9072
« on: December 08, 2014, 11:01:49 PM »
I won't abandon the thread but I will go down with the ship.
9073
« on: December 08, 2014, 10:37:42 PM »
Whatever it is you're dealing with I hope you can find a way to fix or move past it, Gasai.
I will soon, man. Just now is not the time.
I'll definitely go on record and say that I'm not necessarily the best at giving advice, but if you feel like you need to get this stuff off of your chest I'm willing to listen and provide some insight.
It's fine man. You're a cool guy, but I'm fine. I just need to release my flaws I have.
If you don't want to talk about that, then what are your flaws? What do you, think your flaws are? Come on. Shoot.
I'll tell you mine up front and center if you tell me yours. A trade.
Jealousy, dependent, clingy.
I want to better myself, and to prove that I can change. Ugh, the episode of House has the name "Selfish".. See what I mean? I keep seeing these signs.
Jealousy is natural.
Tell you what. I'm jealous. Every time I see two people, friends or something more, it burns me. It hurts. Because I'm alone. And it burns my ass when I try to change shit and it just doesn't change.
How about dependant?
Do you know the reason why I'm here right now? Because I can't fight alone anymore. I can't do it. Try as hard as I might, I can't stand on my own two feet.
How about clingy?
I've gotten overly clingy with a friend. I made a mistake. A big one. And it backfired. Even worse, I made the same mistake again with somebody else. Another friend. And while it didn't backfire, I know that what was said will always push them away from me. The direct opposite of what I wanted.
So, here I am Naru. I'm in your shoes. And you're in mine. How are we going to change it. Don't know yet. But, certainly, not alone.
I made a huge mistake.. The only thing I'm told to do is to wait out and see what can happen. It's been days and soon to be a week, and nothing. I'm scared something will happen and things will drastically change. I made it happen and it's horrible.
If I had to guess. Don't quote me on this. Maybe I'm not reading things right here. Pregnant? Pregnancy, isn't it? Or, you came out. You told somebody. You told somebody what was in your head. Told them what you've kept chained up inside and set that free.
And they flinched when you told them. They backed away. And now you're just waiting right? Waiting for something?
Nothing like that. I did something, it was their last straw. yes, backed away, and I'm told to wait it out. Waiting for something..
Last straw implies doing something to disappoint someone. Friend or family?
Closest friend I have.. Or soon.. "Had"
So you said something or did something. Now, personally, I don't know of any friend of mine that would be dissappointed in me if I said something. And, depending on what I did, they wouldn't be dissappointed either. In the personal context.
You did something big to upset them then. I can think of three things, maybe four, that would do that.
Stealing and using money without permission.
Snapping and lashing out at them, physically, or verbally.
Fucking around with relationships.
If I had to guess, you got upset. Said stuff you didn't mean to.
Things I got annoyed about from the past. Mainly said by jealousy and my idiotic ways.
You try telling them what you're telling me now?
A few times, but no response. So I have to wait to see what happens
Then I guess you'll have to wait. Don't beat yourself up about it. You're here now waiting. It'll come when it comes. And it will come eventually. And if it doesn't, then you have your answer. Point is, you and me? We'll sit around and wait together. If you get bad news, then I'm here. Remember that. There's folks here for you when you need them.
9074
« on: December 08, 2014, 10:17:22 PM »
Whatever it is you're dealing with I hope you can find a way to fix or move past it, Gasai.
I will soon, man. Just now is not the time.
I'll definitely go on record and say that I'm not necessarily the best at giving advice, but if you feel like you need to get this stuff off of your chest I'm willing to listen and provide some insight.
It's fine man. You're a cool guy, but I'm fine. I just need to release my flaws I have.
If you don't want to talk about that, then what are your flaws? What do you, think your flaws are? Come on. Shoot.
I'll tell you mine up front and center if you tell me yours. A trade.
Jealousy, dependent, clingy.
I want to better myself, and to prove that I can change. Ugh, the episode of House has the name "Selfish".. See what I mean? I keep seeing these signs.
Jealousy is natural.
Tell you what. I'm jealous. Every time I see two people, friends or something more, it burns me. It hurts. Because I'm alone. And it burns my ass when I try to change shit and it just doesn't change.
How about dependant?
Do you know the reason why I'm here right now? Because I can't fight alone anymore. I can't do it. Try as hard as I might, I can't stand on my own two feet.
How about clingy?
I've gotten overly clingy with a friend. I made a mistake. A big one. And it backfired. Even worse, I made the same mistake again with somebody else. Another friend. And while it didn't backfire, I know that what was said will always push them away from me. The direct opposite of what I wanted.
So, here I am Naru. I'm in your shoes. And you're in mine. How are we going to change it. Don't know yet. But, certainly, not alone.
I made a huge mistake.. The only thing I'm told to do is to wait out and see what can happen. It's been days and soon to be a week, and nothing. I'm scared something will happen and things will drastically change. I made it happen and it's horrible.
If I had to guess. Don't quote me on this. Maybe I'm not reading things right here. Pregnant? Pregnancy, isn't it? Or, you came out. You told somebody. You told somebody what was in your head. Told them what you've kept chained up inside and set that free.
And they flinched when you told them. They backed away. And now you're just waiting right? Waiting for something?
Nothing like that. I did something, it was their last straw. yes, backed away, and I'm told to wait it out. Waiting for something..
Last straw implies doing something to disappoint someone. Friend or family?
Closest friend I have.. Or soon.. "Had"
So you said something or did something. Now, personally, I don't know of any friend of mine that would be dissappointed in me if I said something. And, depending on what I did, they wouldn't be dissappointed either. In the personal context.
You did something big to upset them then. I can think of three things, maybe four, that would do that.
Stealing and using money without permission.
Snapping and lashing out at them, physically, or verbally.
Fucking around with relationships.
If I had to guess, you got upset. Said stuff you didn't mean to.
Things I got annoyed about from the past. Mainly said by jealousy and my idiotic ways.
You try telling them what you're telling me now?
9075
« on: December 08, 2014, 10:04:51 PM »
Whatever it is you're dealing with I hope you can find a way to fix or move past it, Gasai.
I will soon, man. Just now is not the time.
I'll definitely go on record and say that I'm not necessarily the best at giving advice, but if you feel like you need to get this stuff off of your chest I'm willing to listen and provide some insight.
It's fine man. You're a cool guy, but I'm fine. I just need to release my flaws I have.
If you don't want to talk about that, then what are your flaws? What do you, think your flaws are? Come on. Shoot.
I'll tell you mine up front and center if you tell me yours. A trade.
Jealousy, dependent, clingy.
I want to better myself, and to prove that I can change. Ugh, the episode of House has the name "Selfish".. See what I mean? I keep seeing these signs.
Jealousy is natural.
Tell you what. I'm jealous. Every time I see two people, friends or something more, it burns me. It hurts. Because I'm alone. And it burns my ass when I try to change shit and it just doesn't change.
How about dependant?
Do you know the reason why I'm here right now? Because I can't fight alone anymore. I can't do it. Try as hard as I might, I can't stand on my own two feet.
How about clingy?
I've gotten overly clingy with a friend. I made a mistake. A big one. And it backfired. Even worse, I made the same mistake again with somebody else. Another friend. And while it didn't backfire, I know that what was said will always push them away from me. The direct opposite of what I wanted.
So, here I am Naru. I'm in your shoes. And you're in mine. How are we going to change it. Don't know yet. But, certainly, not alone.
I made a huge mistake.. The only thing I'm told to do is to wait out and see what can happen. It's been days and soon to be a week, and nothing. I'm scared something will happen and things will drastically change. I made it happen and it's horrible.
If I had to guess. Don't quote me on this. Maybe I'm not reading things right here. Pregnant? Pregnancy, isn't it? Or, you came out. You told somebody. You told somebody what was in your head. Told them what you've kept chained up inside and set that free.
And they flinched when you told them. They backed away. And now you're just waiting right? Waiting for something?
Nothing like that. I did something, it was their last straw. yes, backed away, and I'm told to wait it out. Waiting for something..
Last straw implies doing something to disappoint someone. Friend or family?
Closest friend I have.. Or soon.. "Had"
So you said something or did something. Now, personally, I don't know of any friend of mine that would be dissappointed in me if I said something. And, depending on what I did, they wouldn't be dissappointed either. In the personal context. You did something big to upset them then. I can think of three things, maybe four, that would do that. Stealing and using money without permission. Snapping and lashing out at them, physically, or verbally. Fucking around with relationships. If I had to guess, you got upset. Said stuff you didn't mean to.
9076
« on: December 08, 2014, 09:45:19 PM »
Whatever it is you're dealing with I hope you can find a way to fix or move past it, Gasai.
I will soon, man. Just now is not the time.
I'll definitely go on record and say that I'm not necessarily the best at giving advice, but if you feel like you need to get this stuff off of your chest I'm willing to listen and provide some insight.
It's fine man. You're a cool guy, but I'm fine. I just need to release my flaws I have.
If you don't want to talk about that, then what are your flaws? What do you, think your flaws are? Come on. Shoot.
I'll tell you mine up front and center if you tell me yours. A trade.
Jealousy, dependent, clingy.
I want to better myself, and to prove that I can change. Ugh, the episode of House has the name "Selfish".. See what I mean? I keep seeing these signs.
Jealousy is natural.
Tell you what. I'm jealous. Every time I see two people, friends or something more, it burns me. It hurts. Because I'm alone. And it burns my ass when I try to change shit and it just doesn't change.
How about dependant?
Do you know the reason why I'm here right now? Because I can't fight alone anymore. I can't do it. Try as hard as I might, I can't stand on my own two feet.
How about clingy?
I've gotten overly clingy with a friend. I made a mistake. A big one. And it backfired. Even worse, I made the same mistake again with somebody else. Another friend. And while it didn't backfire, I know that what was said will always push them away from me. The direct opposite of what I wanted.
So, here I am Naru. I'm in your shoes. And you're in mine. How are we going to change it. Don't know yet. But, certainly, not alone.
I made a huge mistake.. The only thing I'm told to do is to wait out and see what can happen. It's been days and soon to be a week, and nothing. I'm scared something will happen and things will drastically change. I made it happen and it's horrible.
If I had to guess. Don't quote me on this. Maybe I'm not reading things right here. Pregnant? Pregnancy, isn't it? Or, you came out. You told somebody. You told somebody what was in your head. Told them what you've kept chained up inside and set that free.
And they flinched when you told them. They backed away. And now you're just waiting right? Waiting for something?
Nothing like that. I did something, it was their last straw. yes, backed away, and I'm told to wait it out. Waiting for something..
Last straw implies doing something to disappoint someone. Friend or family?
9077
« on: December 08, 2014, 09:41:40 PM »
Whatever it is you're dealing with I hope you can find a way to fix or move past it, Gasai.
I will soon, man. Just now is not the time.
I'll definitely go on record and say that I'm not necessarily the best at giving advice, but if you feel like you need to get this stuff off of your chest I'm willing to listen and provide some insight.
It's fine man. You're a cool guy, but I'm fine. I just need to release my flaws I have.
If you don't want to talk about that, then what are your flaws? What do you, think your flaws are? Come on. Shoot.
I'll tell you mine up front and center if you tell me yours. A trade.
Jealousy, dependent, clingy.
I want to better myself, and to prove that I can change. Ugh, the episode of House has the name "Selfish".. See what I mean? I keep seeing these signs.
Jealousy is natural.
Tell you what. I'm jealous. Every time I see two people, friends or something more, it burns me. It hurts. Because I'm alone. And it burns my ass when I try to change shit and it just doesn't change.
How about dependant?
Do you know the reason why I'm here right now? Because I can't fight alone anymore. I can't do it. Try as hard as I might, I can't stand on my own two feet.
How about clingy?
I've gotten overly clingy with a friend. I made a mistake. A big one. And it backfired. Even worse, I made the same mistake again with somebody else. Another friend. And while it didn't backfire, I know that what was said will always push them away from me. The direct opposite of what I wanted.
So, here I am Naru. I'm in your shoes. And you're in mine. How are we going to change it. Don't know yet. But, certainly, not alone.
I made a huge mistake.. The only thing I'm told to do is to wait out and see what can happen. It's been days and soon to be a week, and nothing. I'm scared something will happen and things will drastically change. I made it happen and it's horrible.
If I had to guess. Don't quote me on this. Maybe I'm not reading things right here. Pregnant? Pregnancy, isn't it? Or, you came out. You told somebody. You told somebody what was in your head. Told them what you've kept chained up inside and set that free. And they flinched when you told them. They backed away. And now you're just waiting right? Waiting for something?
9078
« on: December 08, 2014, 09:30:23 PM »
Whatever it is you're dealing with I hope you can find a way to fix or move past it, Gasai.
I will soon, man. Just now is not the time.
I'll definitely go on record and say that I'm not necessarily the best at giving advice, but if you feel like you need to get this stuff off of your chest I'm willing to listen and provide some insight.
It's fine man. You're a cool guy, but I'm fine. I just need to release my flaws I have.
If you don't want to talk about that, then what are your flaws? What do you, think your flaws are? Come on. Shoot.
I'll tell you mine up front and center if you tell me yours. A trade.
Jealousy, dependent, clingy.
I want to better myself, and to prove that I can change. Ugh, the episode of House has the name "Selfish".. See what I mean? I keep seeing these signs.
Jealousy is natural. Tell you what. I'm jealous. Every time I see two people, friends or something more, it burns me. It hurts. Because I'm alone. And it burns my ass when I try to change shit and it just doesn't change. How about dependant? Do you know the reason why I'm here right now? Because I can't fight alone anymore. I can't do it. Try as hard as I might, I can't stand on my own two feet. How about clingy? I've gotten overly clingy with a friend. I made a mistake. A big one. And it backfired. Even worse, I made the same mistake again with somebody else. Another friend. And while it didn't backfire, I know that what was said will always push them away from me. The direct opposite of what I wanted. So, here I am Naru. I'm in your shoes. And you're in mine. How are we going to change it. Don't know yet. But, certainly, not alone.
9079
« on: December 08, 2014, 09:16:40 PM »
May I ask what was lost?
I wondered where you went you know. I don't know you. But I noticed your absence.
I can't say specifically.
Valued is the main word I can give you.
Family or friends then. Personal life. Somebody important to you doesn't return the sentiments. Or, everything in general seems grey. You're alone right? Feels like a prison. You're not wanted or cared for and it doesn't seem like anybody gives a shit?
I can't say much, because I know nothing about you. But, I'm here. Here to stay as well. If you want to talk, shoot.
The thing that you should see here, is that you're not as alone as you think. Similar folks group together. They have a knack, for finding each other. There are people here, among you that are riding through the bullshit too. Maybe not the same. But there's a lot of hurt folks here. More than what you see at first glance. If you want to talk, I'm around.
Thanks Sand, but I need to focus on myself and you need to focus on yourself. Only I can bring myself up.
If I need the help, I can ask for it. Don't worry.
Come on. Give it a shot. What do you have to lose? Ask yourself that. What do you have to lose, by taking this shot, right here, and right now? What if something good comes of it? Believe me, I'm doing fine. My life is just a rolling. And it will keep rolling. But I'm sitting here, right now, asking because I can and I choose too. Give it a shot. At worst, you won't get anything. At best, you might gain something. Try me.
9080
« on: December 08, 2014, 09:11:30 PM »
Whatever it is you're dealing with I hope you can find a way to fix or move past it, Gasai.
I will soon, man. Just now is not the time.
I'll definitely go on record and say that I'm not necessarily the best at giving advice, but if you feel like you need to get this stuff off of your chest I'm willing to listen and provide some insight.
It's fine man. You're a cool guy, but I'm fine. I just need to release my flaws I have.
If you don't want to talk about that, then what are your flaws? What do you, think your flaws are? Come on. Shoot. I'll tell you mine up front and center if you tell me yours. A trade.
9081
« on: December 08, 2014, 09:07:59 PM »
Didn't you ever watch Beetlejuice?
You leave the house you get eaten.
9082
« on: December 08, 2014, 09:06:24 PM »
May I ask what was lost?
I wondered where you went you know. I don't know you. But I noticed your absence.
I can't say specifically.
Valued is the main word I can give you.
Family or friends then. Personal life. Somebody important to you doesn't return the sentiments. Or, everything in general seems grey. You're alone right? Feels like a prison. You're not wanted or cared for and it doesn't seem like anybody gives a shit? I can't say much, because I know nothing about you. But, I'm here. Here to stay as well. If you want to talk, shoot. The thing that you should see here, is that you're not as alone as you think. Similar folks group together. They have a knack, for finding each other. There are people here, among you that are riding through the bullshit too. Maybe not the same. But there's a lot of hurt folks here. More than what you see at first glance. If you want to talk, I'm around.
9083
« on: December 08, 2014, 08:58:19 PM »
May I ask what was lost?
I wondered where you went you know. I don't know you. But I noticed your absence.
9084
« on: December 08, 2014, 08:56:55 PM »
You're an inspiration dude! I could possibly go through the same thing one day!
Hmm. Not really. I cheesed it. I packed my shit and left in the city when they were going to offload the first batch into me. Pretty shitty if you ask me. I'm still going through with it. But I'm taking the weaker stuff. I'm a bad example if you want going through with it. But, I hope that you don't have to. Don't even think about it in fact. Keep in high spirits though. With luck, you won' have to go through with anything bad.
. I have a Cyst in the middle of my brain, if it grows they'll have to cut it out. Were you going to have the same thing done?
They can't cut mine out. Too deep. They cut mine out and they start cutting out bits of me! So, the plan was, and still is, blast me with chemo.
9085
« on: December 08, 2014, 08:00:53 PM »
The one, the only, Jack Harkness.
9086
« on: December 08, 2014, 07:46:40 PM »
This is my sense of humor. That frowning medic represents the fact that while I enjoy christmas, some stupid shit always has to happen. And it pisses me off. Yet medic still has a santa hat. Which means I give all the bullshit a middle finger and keep going.
9087
« on: December 08, 2014, 07:42:09 PM »
You're gonna want to prepare yourself Sandtrap. Chemo is going to drag you down like nothing else in your life has before.
God damn nature... I swear, cancer and tumors are nature's practical joke.
It would have killed me in the city. Can't do it alone. I already know what's up, what's coming. And in a shitty environment like that, I'd probably die from depression long before anything else got me. I need my home and folks to go through with this. Even if I have less chances on the weaker stuff over a longer period of time, I'd take it any day over going back there.
9088
« on: December 08, 2014, 07:40:13 PM »
P.S. stop being 14. That's literally your only problem right now
If you think that's the problem, then you're blind.
9089
« on: December 08, 2014, 07:37:47 PM »
You're an inspiration dude! I could possibly go through the same thing one day!
Hmm. Not really. I cheesed it. I packed my shit and left in the city when they were going to offload the first batch into me. Pretty shitty if you ask me. I'm still going through with it. But I'm taking the weaker stuff. I'm a bad example if you want going through with it. But, I hope that you don't have to. Don't even think about it in fact. Keep in high spirits though. With luck, you won' have to go through with anything bad.
9090
« on: December 08, 2014, 07:08:40 PM »
Where do you live, Sandtrap? What city are you referring to?
I live six hours into the middle of nowhere. I reffered to Prince Albert, in Saskatchewan.
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