And they're all pillaging and shit, and God said to them " het, I got these commandments for ya" and they say "what are they?"and God said "well the first is Thou Shalt not Kill"
And the vkings are like, "oh, we cant do that, that's like, what we do."
Si god goes to Ireland and he's like, "hey, I got these comandments for ya" and the Irish are like, "what are they?" and God goes "thou shalt not covet your neighbor's wife." And the Irish are like, "fuvk you guy, we live to fuck".
So then God goes to Egypt and sees Moses in the desert leading the Jews. He goes on down and says "hey, I got some commandments for ya" and Moses says "how much are they" and God said "they're free" and Moses says "fucking great, I'll take ten!"
Spoiler
I've been drunk since at least noon