Quote from: Decimator Omega on April 11, 2020, 03:13:06 PM

Can confirm

http://sep7agon.net/the-flood/sandtrap-70947/30/

"Yep, don't have kids"

I don't think he even read the fucking OP.

normally i'd be the last person to defend secondclass, but given how much i can relate to tactlessly injecting my personal beliefs where they don't necessarily belong, something compelled me to clear this up

all she's really trying to say here is "the fact that cancer can kill such good people is so cruel and so terrible that it's a wonder why we continue to bring more children into this world when they're all so very likely to have a similar fate"

she wasn't necessarily trying to be disrespectful; it was just a combination of very poor timing and very poor phrasing

so yeah secondclass is garbage and that post was bad, but not for the reasons you think

It's honestly somewhat interesting reading through this thread, seeing the reactions of various people. I'm glad I wasn't the only one to bump into Sandtrap. He seems to have left a mark here. I don't believe in coincidence, but it's funny that this particular thread is here not too long after I thought I'd stay here a while, the only reason being that I decided to drop by here was because of Sandtrap and some talks I shared with him in what feels like so long ago. Sandtrap was the first person I ever talked to openly about some personal and extremely hard hitting deaths in my life. Only because he had a way of coaxing it out of me so easily.

At one point I had to ask him what he thought about dying. Wasn't he angry about the situation? I'm the last man standing in my circle of friends, and I lost somebody I love to a drunken idiot who chose to get behind the wheel of a vehicle and drive. I'm not even dead or dying and I'm fucking livid for all of my dead friends if I think about it too much. When I asked him his particular feelings on the matter, essentially what he told me was that "death is only an unbiased function. The awfulness of it comes from our emotions. Our emotional investments in life and in ourselves are being ripped away from us like toys, and we don't like having our toys taken away from us."

That particular conversation stuck with me. In a way it helped me deal a little better in coping over the loss of my friends. If we're talking about statements regarding life and death, I find there's a quaint level of humor in the statement "don't have kids." I'd be in a different place today had I not had very specific conversations with Sandtrap.

Quote from: Decimator Omega on April 11, 2020, 03:13:06 PM

Can confirm

http://sep7agon.net/the-flood/sandtrap-70947/30/

"Yep, don't have kids"

I don't think he even read the fucking OP.

normally i'd be the last person to defend secondclass, but given how much i can relate to tactlessly injecting my personal beliefs where they don't necessarily belong, something compelled me to clear this up

all she's really trying to say here is "the fact that cancer can kill such good people is so cruel and so terrible that it's a wonder why we continue to bring more children into this world when they're all so very likely to have a similar fate"

she wasn't necessarily trying to be disrespectful; it was just a combination of very poor timing and very poor phrasing

so yeah secondclass is garbage and that post was bad, but not for the reasons you think

I'm not good with loss, and when Sandtrap died, my grief manifested through anger. That was the point of my "don't have kids" line, and yes you hit the nail on the head above. But more than that, I just didn't know what else to say. Do I talk about Sandtrap's and I PMs, about how he always had faith in me and talked me through my dark, self-harm, self-hate times? No, that would just seem like posturing especially to this forum which hates me. Do I try to eulogize him, come up with some grand summation of not only his life but his values/noble traits? No, as you can see from my recent posts I'm not nearly eloquent enough to do that.

So I said what was truly on my mind. I tried to display my anger through the sentence that summed up everything I felt, not only about Sandtrap but of the bigger problem: death itself. Again, I'm sorry if this isn't making much sense, but I never meant any disrespect toward Sandtrap, and I'll leave this post by just restating that he was one of the best not only users, but people that I've known.