COMMS OFFICER HAS WON THE PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION!

Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
Since Cortana 5 isn't actually a user, Comms Officer wins the 2015-2017 Sep7agon Presidential term by default. Here is my inauguration speech.

I am proud as always of my adoring populace, who have granted me the great honour of serving a third term as your beloved president. I love you guys, and you know who you are. As for the rest of you nigger faggots... scorched earth, you retarded motherfuckers. Going forward, we shall enter into a new era of prosperity, an era that will be achieved when I round up every single last retarded faggot who dared to vote against me and give them their just desserts. Listen to me, you fucking niggers. There is no hope left for you. You cannot run, you cannot hide. I will track you all down, cut off all your cocks, shove them up your asses, and then repeatedly anally violate you with my 14-inch cock until your severed cocks mash together with your already-damaged prostates into a bloody red jelly of dead flesh, shit, and semen. Oh yes, there WILL be blood. Once I'm done with you, I will find every single person you have ever cared for, and the atrocities that follow will leave the world forever devastated. The blood of all my victims and the jizz with which I cleanse them of their sins will blend together into an unholy pink ocean that will drown the planet for centuries to come. In the end, all that will remain will be me and those loyal to me, sailing that ocean of horror on a continent-sized structure woven from your defiled corpses.
Last Edit: April 19, 2015, 01:10:50 AM by Not Comms Officer


Jet Wave | Heroic Unstoppable!
 
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It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.


Jet Wave | Heroic Unstoppable!
 
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It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.


Jet Wave | Heroic Unstoppable!
 
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It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol
What? No.

I got banned a lot.


Jet Wave | Heroic Unstoppable!
 
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It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol
What? No.

I got banned a lot.
Gee, I wonder why?


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol
What? No.

I got banned a lot.
Gee, I wonder why?
Cause I spammed the forum like all the time. So what?


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Moron.


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420


Jet Wave | Heroic Unstoppable!
 
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It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol
What? No.

I got banned a lot.
Gee, I wonder why?
Cause I spammed the forum like all the time. So what?
You mean like...


...like now?


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol
What? No.

I got banned a lot.
Gee, I wonder why?
Cause I spammed the forum like all the time. So what?
You mean like...


...like now?
So? Are you actually annoyed by me hosting a Presidential election? Lol.


Jive Turkey | Mythic Invincible!
 
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We need to run that back


Jet Wave | Heroic Unstoppable!
 
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It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol
What? No.

I got banned a lot.
Gee, I wonder why?
Cause I spammed the forum like all the time. So what?
You mean like...


...like now?
So? Are you actually annoyed by me hosting a Presidential election? Lol.
By you in general.

Like, worse than Deci.


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol
What? No.

I got banned a lot.
Gee, I wonder why?
Cause I spammed the forum like all the time. So what?
You mean like...


...like now?
So? Are you actually annoyed by me hosting a Presidential election? Lol.
By you in general.

Like, worse than Deci.
Stay mad.  8)


Jet Wave | Heroic Unstoppable!
 
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It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol
What? No.

I got banned a lot.
Gee, I wonder why?
Cause I spammed the forum like all the time. So what?
You mean like...


...like now?
So? Are you actually annoyed by me hosting a Presidential election? Lol.
By you in general.

Like, worse than Deci.
Stay mad.  8)
If you're still here, I will.


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
We need to run that back
Oh no, I guess you'll just have to wait until 2017. :^(


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
It's not enough that you embarrass yourself with this stupid fucking shit, you have to break your own goddamn rules just to win this ego-stroking game? You lost to someone who doesn't even come here, obviously nobody likes you. Didn't you ask for a ban last year? Why are you even back? Will no one else accept you?
Check the 2011 and 2013 elections.
The ones where you were using alt accounts?
Yeah.
So the only way other people could like you was by pretending to be other people?


lol
What? No.

I got banned a lot.
Gee, I wonder why?
Cause I spammed the forum like all the time. So what?
You mean like...


...like now?
So? Are you actually annoyed by me hosting a Presidential election? Lol.
By you in general.

Like, worse than Deci.
Stay mad.  8)
If you're still here, I will.
CAN'T MOSSAD COMMS OFFICER


 
Naru
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The Rage....
I think I win the 2025 election by default


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
I think I win the 2025 election by default
How so?


 
big sponge
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>tfw they think they're people


Not Comms Officer | Legendary Invincible!
 
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Khilafah420
>tfw they think they're people
Oh no, too bad only one other person voted for me....

I guess that only one person will accompany me on the Great Journey.


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My signature is my name printed, I was never taught how to write cursive. FML.