This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.
Messages - RomanGladiator
Pages: 1 ... 678 910 ... 163
211
« on: May 26, 2016, 05:34:06 PM »
Took out SAT practice books from the library and studied most of the day Tuesday and Wednesday. Took it again today, I got even lower, a 600 out of 650. The first time I missed by two percent. Two fucking percent. A 93 isn't good enough, you have to get a 95. I can't take it again until July. How else can I tutor/teach? This company expects too much, a 93 on the SAT should be good enough. Just depressed I haven't worked and earned money in an entire month.
212
« on: May 24, 2016, 12:17:59 PM »
I thought you wanted to be a full time player tho
No. I only felt that way because I'm jealous of people who have consistent sex lives. I had it once, oh well. Now I need to concentrate on myself and my future. I'm a 24 year old NEET now and feel like offing my self.
213
« on: May 23, 2016, 03:20:13 PM »
When your sole inspiration was "bitches love teachers", you were bound to get sick of it pretty quickly.
Find something you like, or something you're good at, and go for it. Get some character.
But then I realized it's one career that can do some good. I was the struggling student once. I barely got into college. I want to teach. I just need to get over the existing issues I have, mainly mt confidence.
214
« on: May 23, 2016, 03:19:16 PM »
Tutoring interview was today. It was basically the SATs all over again. I didn't pass. I needed to get a 650, I got a 610. It was just reading and writing. 60 minutes, and 35 minutes. I can take it one last time on Wednesday. I want to do this. It's good money but also helping students out. I don't know...I feel like I have nothing right now and need something.
215
« on: May 21, 2016, 08:12:30 PM »
Stop trying to be this image of a person and just be content with yourself.
I wish I could sit around and play video games all day. What's wrong with that? Sure, you should be doing something with your life, but not because you're "supposed to", but because YOU want to. Otherwise there's no point.
I did that for eight months after graduating from college and was basically a shut-in. I want to do something good for society, or else I'm just a waste. Now I realize how urgent it is and how quickly time flies by,
216
« on: May 21, 2016, 07:26:31 PM »
Please get a therapist
It won't help, I went a few times when I was 14. They don't magically make anything better. It's just talking to someone about your problems. I know what's wrong with me.
lol no you don't
Okay, I'll list all my problems and strange things about me then: Hate my appearance, never satisfied with it since at least fifth grade. Anxious about public speaking, being in front of a group of people. It prevents me from a lot of things. Stutter when I'm nervous, not sure what to say. Not good at socializing/small talk Moods where I don't want to get out of bed some days. Don't have the drive and ambition to succeed like normal adults my age, just wallow in my pity, think it doesn't matter anyways if I do something with my life because no one will like me anyways Think I'm worthless, not equal to others. THoughts of suicide since I was a freshman in HS for never fitting in and not being social Reliance on video games since I was 10 to escape. Never wanted to work so I'd have more time to play them, still they define my life and I want to give them up. Don't smile. I'm not happy about a single thing in my life. I feel like I'm just existing, and not living. I haven't experienced as much as other 24 years olds. Anger issues, control issues, try to force things. My parents raised me to be a spoiled man child who doesn't pay rate and is currently unemployed. I don't know when the hell I'll be able to finally grow up and move out. I can't be romantically involved with anyone because I'm not "good enough" for having no direction in life and living with my parents. I hope an accident happens to me or I do in my sleep because I feel worthless and not doing anything for society. I continue to make the wrong decisions. I have no social circle or friends to spend time with on a regular basis. I've NEVER been truly happy or have any achievements I'm proud of. I fear driving on the highway and have extreme anxiety about it, all because my mom was in an accident when I was little. All in all, if I fell asleep and did not wake up tomorrow morning, it would be a good thing. I wanted to do a job that helps students, but was so lazy I didn't want to sacrifice my free time to do this graduate level coursework, and I was so anxious to observe a classroom because I kept thinking how awkward it would be for me just sitting there. I don't know, I just hate my life. I am ugly and lounging around wasting the only life I was given.
217
« on: May 21, 2016, 06:11:49 PM »
Please get a therapist
It won't help, I went a few times when I was 14. They don't magically make anything better. It's just talking to someone about your problems. I know what's wrong with me.
218
« on: May 21, 2016, 09:52:12 AM »
I've done nothing for four years. No work, no school, just gotten sicker and sicker with no actual help from any doctor.
I just turned 25 today and It's depressing as hell. A quarter of a century and I've nothing to show for it. My life is wasting away because I can't seem to find a doctor that can figure out what exactly is wrong with me and help me get rid of it. So I sit at home, suffer in pain everyday, and rot away in a dead town with no opportunity.
Regardless, I'm still trickin' along. I still have the resolve to overcome this and finally make something of myself.
Don't take what opportunity you still have provided for you for granted. Take charge of your life while you still can.
I hope you feel better. I guess I should be thankful.
219
« on: May 21, 2016, 09:51:12 AM »
Ever considered the military? Serve four years, see some new places, get some experience and skills, then get your college paid for. There are tons of interesting jobs. You're a little on the older side, but it's not uncommon; plus, you seem to be in decent shape.
I have ulcerative colitis and IBS, wouldn't be able to.
220
« on: May 21, 2016, 08:49:09 AM »
Focus on getting a history teacher spot
You can't in my state unless you have a master's degree.
221
« on: May 20, 2016, 07:09:45 PM »
So what's your next move m8?
I don't know...no clue. Can;t even concentrate to read a book, I had to force myself to even get a haircut today, and that took a whole week of motivation. I am on the internet all day, from when I get up until I go to bed. Being a history teacher was the perfect career for me and I threw it away because of my shyness. I;m not a suit who wants to dress up and bs people into buying something, I don't give a shit about a company's profits, etc... I love learning and trying to explain things I know to others. And I fucked it up because of my insecurities
222
« on: May 20, 2016, 07:02:46 PM »
Oh, Roman. Don't be silly.
Your life was ruined a long time ago.
I know. I'm so behind everyone else my age. I wish I could just find a cyanide pill somewhere.
223
« on: May 20, 2016, 06:53:45 PM »
Dude. You need to relax.
It's impossible when you'v made such stupid decisions as I have. Basically my brain: "Oh I'll put off graduate school to find a girlfriend this year, to then have the confidence to go and do it next year" Who the hell thinks like that? And not working right now, I am completely worthless to anyone. Yeah, being in a "relationship" consumes me and my life choices because I'm jealous of my brother and people I know who are, and have been for years. And I want to travel but can't by myself. My family won't want to do shit this summer, they never do and we are an abnormal family that never does anything together. Never been to Disney! Never been to the west coast! Never been down south! Never been out of New England! They weren't hard enough on me growing up and I turned into a man-child with no responsibility. Fuck, just because of my low self esteem and self conciousness and anxiety about getting in front of a classroom to do student teaching I fucking ruined a great opportunity and the possible chance to meet someone who'd be interested in me.
224
« on: May 20, 2016, 06:45:58 PM »
Didn't you get that tutor position bro?
The interview is Monday. It may be a scam, who knows. And if it's just part time, I can't do that for an entire year.
225
« on: May 20, 2016, 06:44:58 PM »
We told you so.
I know. Now I can barely sit still and I spent the whole day on the couch browing reddit on my laptop and I am starting to lose it tonight because I feel so worthless not doing anything. NO friends! No significant other! Not that that matters, but even just a good friend. And now no work at all! Not worth anything to society when I am like this
226
« on: May 20, 2016, 06:41:09 PM »
By not doing this program this year. It was my chance to get out of a terrible job and grow up and have a career. I'm going crazy every day now with nothing to do. I cannot do nothing for an entire year and not work, I will literally go crazy and kill myself, I'm already losing it after not working three weeks but I cannot go back to working at KMart, I need something better right away. This is not what a 24 year old's life should be like: not paying rent and living with his parents not working. I can never have a partner now for sure at this point in my life. Everything I try to do to relax I feel guilty for not working. I read on reddit that some people were unemployed for years and I wonder how they can last. I seriously feel unstable. I'm such a fucking idiot for deferring.
227
« on: May 20, 2016, 08:50:18 AM »
I actually masurbated once last night, and once this morning. I had to rethink my technique, and hope I didn't damage anything. Going against the Doctor's orders, heavy risk, but the prize... Basically don't do that for six weeks, but I did it after two.
228
« on: May 20, 2016, 07:03:23 AM »
Same. Feel like I fucked up my future
229
« on: May 19, 2016, 10:55:59 PM »
Ashely. French teacher, blue eyes, red hair, nice chubby figure. Best night of my life. And she wanted it again in the morning. It was more than just sex, she made me laugh too. I don't hate her for never wanting to see me again. I had no idea we'd end up in bed together that night. But it did hurt me badly for months.
230
« on: May 19, 2016, 10:13:06 PM »
have you ever focused on anything but getting off?
Star Wars rumors.
231
« on: May 19, 2016, 10:11:36 PM »
Jamie can give me a prosthetic hand job and be my King Slayer.
232
« on: May 19, 2016, 10:08:02 PM »
On June 9th, I can finally masturbate again. I have a new faith in God.
233
« on: May 19, 2016, 10:05:56 PM »
If it was the only time I saw her, does that count?
234
« on: May 18, 2016, 09:47:11 PM »
Get some more sleep. Sleep helps out with depression. Sleep helps with elevating your mood. Sleep is good. Sleep is God. SLEEEEP
Also congrats on the new gig. Stick to it for a while.
It's not confirmed yet, interview Monday. and i may need a second position too
Best of luck with your interview! GET SLEEP THE NIGHT BEFORE! It's really important to sleep.
Also why would you need a second position?
It might be only part time, it's tutoring so it's based on need. Didn't really learn too much about it over the phone, but if it is really $18 an hour I want to do it, and also to help students. It's almost an alternative way to teach what I know. And I realized this week I have so many things to work on with myself before I can commit to an intense full time graduate program
235
« on: May 18, 2016, 09:42:23 PM »
Get some more sleep. Sleep helps out with depression. Sleep helps with elevating your mood. Sleep is good. Sleep is God. SLEEEEP
Also congrats on the new gig. Stick to it for a while.
It's not confirmed yet, interview Monday. and i may need a second position too
236
« on: May 18, 2016, 09:27:24 PM »
Bro you have to relax.
Your decision can be reversed in a semester's time if you change your mind. It's really no big deal.
You have a degree. That alone makes you more successful than 50% of other 24 year olds. You have your head on straight. If you want to see a therapist, go ahead. Nothing wrong with that. I've done it, I know friends who still do it to this day.
It's a yearly program and only starts in May. If I can just find a few things to keep me busy for a year I will be fine, but I need to work and make money.
237
« on: May 18, 2016, 07:54:09 PM »
I really need to get mental help. I just can't relax after the decision I've made. I just want someome to talk to and relate to. I feel worthless. I need something positive to do or hear.
238
« on: May 18, 2016, 07:31:02 PM »
I can't fall asleep at night. Since I was in high school I never felt normal and have thoughts of suicide. They still creep up on me but I've never tried. I just think about falling asleep and never waking up. I was bullied in high school and middle school, which added to my low self-esteem. I don't know what to do anymore. I threw away this opportunity because I wasn't motivated enough to do the work and a lot of other factors...I can make a good teacher. I was bullied and can be there for students that need help, but I had a nervous breakdown about this program. I want to be a better person guys, and I'm tired of feeling that I'm worthless and have no purpose.
239
« on: May 18, 2016, 04:14:39 PM »
I don't really see what the point of saying anything is considering you'd ignore it anyway.
This is probably the main people have stopped caring, Roman. At least, I know I kind of have. It's like with your recent thread on what happened with that one girl. I spent a decent amount of time doing some research for you and present you with actual sound advice based on medical facts, which you didn't even acknowledge but instead went on for another 2 pages about how the world was going to end because of a tear on your dick. Doesn't exactly make people want to help.
I know. Maybe an internet forum is not the best place for me to get help anyways. I really think I need some type of therapy, I just have to push myself to get it.
240
« on: May 18, 2016, 02:15:37 PM »
good.
start fucking below 170lbs while ur at it.
The type of girls I like is not going to change...
No commitment to self betterment.
There oughtta be a law.
I don't see why what type of girl I like has anything to do with it. But I've learned my lesson from the last one
Pages: 1 ... 678 910 ... 163
|
Show Posts