so I got into the shower and I started trying to make this faucet work. at our house we have one leaver that turns counter clockwise that gets hotter as you pull it down. It's so fucking rustic here, we have to use this double faucet thing that you have to adjust until the temperature is right. So I got in there and I finally started getting this thing working, right? So I was like "let's turn up the heat!" and I turned up the heat pressure and I tried taking the shower head off of it's little holder and the shower head literally disconnected from the hose and it started spraying water everywhere. It was blur to me because I must have ducked and covered my face when it happen (an instinctual defense mechanism). So I shut the water off and I realize that the hose does not screw on. The shower head is just inserted into this hose.  So I can't turn up the water pressure very high at all. I don't know why the fucking thing isn't a screw on at least! But here's what I discovered... the nozzle that hooks into the shower head is literally the perfect shape to put inside of my butt. So I could give myself an enema any time that I want (which would be especially helpful before any kind of anal stuff). So yeah it's almost as though this was meant to happen. And I know that you gotta put luke warm water into your butt and not the fucking hot water, not the fucking cold water, bitch I aint about to shock my internal organs with temperatures! I am too fucking real for that shit.

So yeah I took such a long shower. It was alright once I got the shower going and stuff. I think the people who live near me like if they can hear the shower and stuff then they're gonna be thinking that I take really long showers haha! We'll they're gonna have to deal with that because I am not trying to take some little shower and then call it quits. I am not trying to live some stupid ass rustic lifestyle. Bitch this apartment is like 100 years old, but it's got a new kitchen and new carpet and paint. It looks fucking gorgeous. It's pretty big too. I got a huge ass closet, short little hallway leading into my bathroom. A nice large living room and a small bedroom. The walls rotate so if you want the side with the really nice old cabinet or the flat side you can rotate it. there's another rotating wall too that you can rotate to make the bedroom area exposed to the living room. All the cabinets and dressers have skeletons key locks. So yeah it's fucking gucci. Except there's a fucking steam heater right in the bathroom and the valve that is like burning hot is less than a foot away from my knee. So yeah that is not going to fly. I am going to have to find some sort of thing to wrap around that.

So yeah this place is rustic and stuff, like kinda not all the way up to date (we had to install wireless internet in here today), but it's cool because it's really pretty and stuff and it's right on the main street which is just miles and miles of restaurants and family owned shops. This city has like 50000 people in it. 

It was blur to me because I must have ducked and covered my face when it happen (an instinctual defense mechanism).

How hard did your father used to hit you?

The amounts of time you've used the word "so" should be considered a crime of the highest order.

Quote from: Loaf on March 07, 2015, 06:13:01 PM

Quote from: Kleenex on March 07, 2015, 06:11:47 PM

Quote from: Loaf on March 07, 2015, 06:06:29 PM

It was blur to me because I must have ducked and covered my face when it happen (an instinctual defense mechanism).

How hard did your father used to hit you?

not even once.

What a shame. Aside from me being a total dipshit I hope everything goes swell in your apartment my fellow effeminate companion.

lol you know, i actually like it when people call me a dipshit and stuff. It's so much better than being called something demeaning. Because like I know that I have an attitude. That doesn't even phase me when you say that, it makes me feel better because I actually know that and I love it. Muh companion mmmmmmmmm :u thank you companion.

What the fuck are you people

BONER ALERT!

weak

just like I like em

edit, I thought I was responding to someone else.

Dingo-tier posting in here.

Yeah, This will probably crush your hopes and stuff but I am not pretty.

So I could give myself an enema any time

do you test this out with every object or something.

Yeah, This will probably crush your hopes and stuff but I am not pretty.

I don't really care lad. We're all beautiful in our own way. And just because you think you aren't pretty doesn't mean that I will think you're not.