How do you not hide the fact that you're a complete asshole, but at the same time not make everyone around you hate you? Because here's the thing, I am an aggressive, negative person. So I have to try to act nice around others, because if you don't wear a smile then people will ask what's wrong and they'll get upset. So I have to try to fake being a nice positive person, even though I'm not, I'm afraid that literally every single person in the world will dislike me. I'm so afraid to let anyone talk to me, because I just feel like everyone's gonna hate me anyways. I hate myself, I don't even care enough to try to hide that, I don't care about preserving my "image". Often times I don't even pretend to be nice, people dislike me anyways, lose/lose.

Just avoid human interaction.

I imagine you being the quiet kid who sits alone at lunch shit talking people under your breath as they walk by

that's me LOL

sometimes when I'm just walking around at the grocery store I will briefly glance at people and just scream the most awful stuff imaginable at them in my head. On the surface I show nothing though.

Have you ever considered meth?