Who are these airheads that park inches from your car in an empty lot? On what planet is it considered a good idea to make it hard for others and themselves to get in and out, and not ding the sides of another car when opening a door?

Nevermind how stupid and inconsiderate it is - I really just can't wrap my head around it; and fucking everyone does it! I've even sat in my car before with my door open, using the extra room to do things such as eating comfortably, getting fresh air, looking for something that went under the seat... and here comes some gudgeon in a minivan, asking me to move so they can park right up my ass in a huge lot with three other cars in it. I mean, I have to try real hard to find a polite way of saying, "Go shove your electric soymobile up your loose fuckhole, you stupid Californian."

Granted, I'm not unrealistic about my disdain for the practice. Like, even with slow people, I do try to be somewhat lenient considering that a ton of drivers do it, and likely don't do it solely for the purpose of being a jackass. Arguably, I'm a jackass from a certain point of view for parking in a slight diagonal angle and taking up two spots - but I only ever do it in cases where there are vast amounts of available spaces and I doubt they'll fill up while I'm there. And when I do actually interact with these people, I remain polite and docile because it's less trouble just to deal with it than to actually give an attitude to random strangers.

The only thing I do kind of regret is that while I'm extremely careful when people park next to me where there's no choice for them, I'm too annoyed to be careful with dinging cars that pull up inches from my door, where they have a hundred other roomy options; (although I am careful enough to move the car away when I realize than I've done it, hehe). And of course, I never try to do it, but I have a really heavy door (an '87 Cadillac), and it gets a tad hard to control once it gets to a certain point because it pushes itself out the rest of the way. I feel a bit bad about it at times, but in all honesty, they're kind of asking for it by doing what they're doing.

The moral of the story is just not to crowd other cars in empty lots. It's a real pain in the ass and there's no good reason to do it. Don't wait until you've been dented or you've dented to stop doing it - it's fucking stupid, so just stop. Thanks.

My friends and I had a bit of fun with a sports car that parked waaaaaay back in the back of the Six Flags parking lot. There were no other cars around for at least 3-4 rows and we parked right next to this car in my friend's beater. Had a laugh and walked the long walk to the park.

When we came back to the car a couple hours later for lunch (had to get our money's worth and food in there is STUPID expensive) the car had moved one row forward.

So...we also moved one row forward and re-parked next to him before we headed back to the park.

Good times.

Kill yourself

Interestingly enough because my car looks nice and is considered a bit of a unicorn, whenever I’m out and another nice car, say a porsche or ferrari needs to park somewhere, they park next to me

Most annoying shit I swear lol