My god... That was Awesome!!!!My sides at the butthurt part! xD
The once believed to be invincible ninja felt the pain of the butthurt, his back exploded in a rain of fire toppling the giant. Foman not wanting the same fate, stomped and stomped as hard as he could trying to kill as many Floodian as he could, banning them permanently.
I am mildly bummed out that there's not a part two to read, though.I need to know what happens!
10/10 would recommend too a friend
Everything is so perfect. Longface being the Gravemind. FUCKING LOLThese are just simply the best Flood Fiction I've read since Tartan's
Part 1:It was the ending phase of the great war between DeeJ's Destiny[emoji769] and the Flood. The Floodian forces had cornered DeeJ to his last remaining stronghold, but in doing so they had forced his hand. Destiny was going to be launched. DeeJ's Desticles made a strong defense against the onslaught of Floodian troopers...that is until the protecting shield that protected DeeJ's citadel was taken down by the Flood. TBlocks and Icywind were able to deactivate the last tower that powered the citadel's defenses. "Shields down." TBlocks reported seeing the now exposed citadel and the Desticles protecting it. Vien, within his assault carrier, entered the fray. "Now DeeJ, your end has come." Vien said as he prepared to glass the citadel. Then out of slip space came a corrupted ship. "#Off-topic...by Urk brace for impact!" Vien yelled as the massive and corrupted forum crashed into the lands.TBlocks and Icywind noticed that chunks and pieces of that forum deviated and blasted into the tower they stood in. Out of the heated rocks emerged the dreaded Offtopites who corrupted everything they touched. Their grotesque form made Icywind want to hurl. "Its the Offtopites! We need to get back out there." TBlocks stated as he unleashed a hail of bullets onto the beasts. Meanwhile outside, on the snowy battlefield beyond the towers, Kiyo rallied her forces for the final assault on DeeJ and his slaves. Several other Floodians joined her, among them were the mighty Mr. Psychologist, the elegant Noelle, and the warlord known as DemonicChronic. It was almost time to unleash the Floodian armies until Kiyo heard the sound of #Off-Topic crashing upon the ancient lands that once belonged to Bungie. Tanks and warthogs were ready to roll once TBlocks and Icywind exited the tower with the help of Vien's Elites. "I must return with the second wave, TBlocks, I will join you soon." Icywind told his friend and battle-brother. TBlocks nodded in agreement, Icywind entered a Phantom drop ship, inside of it awaited Sentra who began to nag him for not hurrying up with the battle.TBlocks boarded a tank and with the other Floodian generals, spearheaded the attack on the citadel. "Citadel on sight! Desticles are throwing everything they have!" Slash, another Floodian commander, stated through the radio. The two opposing forces clashed in both a ground and air battles. The Desticles proved to be as resilient as ever, but they were between a rock and a hard place. Floodian ground forces advanced towards the citadel, rolling though the Desticles defenses. Kiyo, aboard a pelican gunship, aided on the air battle as much as she could supporting the air units. A hornet was sent to TBlocks and the others once they were done with the defenses alongside the cliff. They got inside and prepared to enter the citadel when two incredible moderators were unleashed. Foman and Recon. They were the last line of defense, and DeeJ was not going to give up that easily. Everything and everyone that was on fighting condition attacked the two ninjas, the two giants swatted around several gunships as if they were flies. DemonicChronic found a weakness in their armor while he avoided the gigantic arms of Foman. Their backs were exposed, showing their fleshy under skin. "Hit them on the ass! They can't handle the butthurt!" He informed his friends. TBlocks, with this information, flew his hornet around Recon and found the weakness and fired a rain of high caliber of bullets and rockets. The once believed to be invincible ninja felt the pain of the butthurt, his back exploded in a rain of fire toppling the giant. Foman not wanting the same fate, stomped and stomped as hard as he could trying to kill as many Floodian as he could, banning them permanently. Slash and DemonicChronic joined forces and with their hornets fired at the evil moderator. While he was distracted, TBlocks landed on the entrance bridge into the citadel, he was joined by Icywind and Sentra. "Activate this bridge Sentra, the community manager will die by my hands!" Icywind yelled."Calamity! If we only had more time!" Sentra nagged but nonetheless activated the bridge that allowed them to enter the citadel. As the duo ran into the main gate, TBlocks felt a message entering his advanced hockey suit's helmet. "It asked and I answered...for a moment of safety I lost damnation on the stars." It was a message, sent by Korra who had gone missing along with a group of Floodian back on the Septagon it had been attacked by Off-Topic. TBlocks noted the message, he knew that she was in pain but there was a mission to be done.The duo passed the main gate but soon realized that they were too late, DeeJ began his broadcast above. "My faithful, stand firm! Although enemies crowd around us we still tread the blessed path! In a moment I will launch Destiny and who buy it will be saved!" DeeJ said to his surviving Desticles within the citadel, he showed that he had captured Cheat and would force him to launch Destiny. "TBlocks, how close are you?" Kiyo asked, TBlocks and Icywind looked above, it was a long elevator ride up the citadel tower. "Not close enough." He replied. As our heroes began their dreaded elevator ride, Cheat was thrown into the ground by the traitorous Brad Pitt, who was now a lackey of DeeJ's. "Is that the best you can do!?" Cheat taunted the single minded beast, Pitt grabbed Cheat by the neck again and roared angrily. "Come on, impress me."DeeJ turned to them, "Stop you imbecile! He wants you to kill him, I'll prefer if you did not." DeeJ ordered the traitor, he brought Cheat towards the control panel next to DeeJ."What's the matter pegboy? Cant start your own party?" Cheat trolled on DeeJ even on his wounded state. "I admit, I need your help. But that secret will muted with all the rest." DeeJ replied, but none of them seemed to see the incoming pelican drop ship coming towards the tower's stupidly big window. It crashed and crushed Pitt and the other traitors to death. One of the surviving traitors stood up but was met with a shotgun blast, Kiyo had to intervene personally since TBlocks and Icywind would take too long to get here. "Cheat!" She cried when she saw the wounded Cheat standing next to the launch panel."Get out of here!" Cheat responded."Not without you!" Kiyo replied, she reloaded her shotgun and blasted the incoming Desticles ganging up on her. "You delay the inevitable, one of you will launch Destiny. You cannot kill them all." DeeJ said and he was right."You're right..." Kiyo realized, she aimed her pistol at Cheat. "First me...then you. Now!" Cheat yelled, Kiyo hesitated to shoot her beloved friend but it was too late. She was struck by a hammer, the Banhammer. She fell on the floor, her body lifeless. "No!!!" Cheat screamed and ran to her but he was caught by two Desticles. "Your forefathers wisely set aside their compassion, steeled themselves to what needed to be done. I see now why they left you behind..." DeeJ said as he moved next to Cheat. "You were weak, and Guardians are strong." The evi! Manager grabbed Cheat's hand forced him to launch Destiny. The long dormant citadel became alive once more, TBlocks and Icywind reached the top of the citadel tower. They looked around...Suddenly, Twp grotesque beings, Offtopites jumped down in front of them. "Do not shoot but listen! Let me lead you safely to OUR foe. Only you can halt what he has set in motion." The controlling hive mind of Off-Topic, long face, said. TBlocks and Icywind were joined by dozens and dozens of Offtopites, they didn't like it but they knew that to take DeeJ down they will need all the help they could get.End of Part 1.
AND THEN I SWOOPED IN, TEA IN HAND, AND I SMITED THE EVIL DEEJ WITH MY UMBRELLAOT: Splendid story