Quote from: Kal on January 26, 2016, 12:17:36 AMIt's only impossible because you're telling yourself it is.I hate my sense of humour, my habitual tendencies, the way i speak, my inability to connect with people, my physique, my voice, my awkward level of intelligence... none of which I can change.
It's only impossible because you're telling yourself it is.
Quote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:29:04 AMQuote from: Jive Turkey on January 26, 2016, 12:22:48 AMQuote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:21:14 AMQuote from: Kal on January 26, 2016, 12:17:36 AMIt's only impossible because you're telling yourself it is.I hate my sense of humour, my habitual tendencies, the way i speak, my inability to connect with people, my physique, my voice, my awkward level of intelligence... none of which I can change.What are your reasons for hating those things?Example: "I hate my voice because it's too high"Humour: because it's esoteric and often childish or unintelligentHabits: i clench my jaw a lot. Grind my teeth too. It gives me head aches.The way I speak: it's often hard to follow my train of thought for some reason, even though to me it feels like im just saying the most basic things ever. Makes it hard for people to empathise or sympathise with me (you can see it in this thread, even)My physique: i just dont like it, idkMy voice: i just find my own voice annoying.Intelligence: im at this weird level where i'm smarter than most people i talk to but not smart enough to play ball with the people who are "speaking my language", if that makes any senseThis is going to sound cliche as fuck but all of those things are what make you special, and you can improve them too. I have a ton of resources I can lead you to that I've collected over the years that will definitely improve your self image dude. It sounds cheesy but I believe self-improvement will help you so much. I truly believe my deep involvement in self improvement material from ages 14-now set the base for my impenetrable wall of self confidence. Completely serious not trying to flex, I love myself so much and I'm surprised at how a lot of people I talk to don't feel the same way about themselves. If you want me to go through the effort I'll link some stuff bro but only if you'll actually look into it.
Quote from: Jive Turkey on January 26, 2016, 12:22:48 AMQuote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:21:14 AMQuote from: Kal on January 26, 2016, 12:17:36 AMIt's only impossible because you're telling yourself it is.I hate my sense of humour, my habitual tendencies, the way i speak, my inability to connect with people, my physique, my voice, my awkward level of intelligence... none of which I can change.What are your reasons for hating those things?Example: "I hate my voice because it's too high"Humour: because it's esoteric and often childish or unintelligentHabits: i clench my jaw a lot. Grind my teeth too. It gives me head aches.The way I speak: it's often hard to follow my train of thought for some reason, even though to me it feels like im just saying the most basic things ever. Makes it hard for people to empathise or sympathise with me (you can see it in this thread, even)My physique: i just dont like it, idkMy voice: i just find my own voice annoying.Intelligence: im at this weird level where i'm smarter than most people i talk to but not smart enough to play ball with the people who are "speaking my language", if that makes any sense
Quote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:21:14 AMQuote from: Kal on January 26, 2016, 12:17:36 AMIt's only impossible because you're telling yourself it is.I hate my sense of humour, my habitual tendencies, the way i speak, my inability to connect with people, my physique, my voice, my awkward level of intelligence... none of which I can change.What are your reasons for hating those things?Example: "I hate my voice because it's too high"
Quote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:32:08 AMI definitely definitely definitely dont lack confidence. Its not that.Im also not particularly shy either. Im one of those guys thatll just be straight up when i like someone and start making moves immediately (unless there's something in the way, like, a boyfriend. Then i dont do anything but casual talk every once in awhile) I'm gonna echo Nuka here and suggest you talk to a Psych. In fact I'd suggest it to like half the users here tbh
I definitely definitely definitely dont lack confidence. Its not that.Im also not particularly shy either. Im one of those guys thatll just be straight up when i like someone and start making moves immediately (unless there's something in the way, like, a boyfriend. Then i dont do anything but casual talk every once in awhile)
Quote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:21:14 AMQuote from: Kal on January 26, 2016, 12:17:36 AMIt's only impossible because you're telling yourself it is.I hate my sense of humour, my habitual tendencies, the way i speak, my inability to connect with people, my physique, my voice, my awkward level of intelligence... none of which I can change.Is "incredibly low" synonymous with awkward?
Eli. Move on to someone else. Find someone who does reciprocate. Trust me on this. Do not stay in this hell. I was there for a long, long time. If you don't have someone, find them. Even if they're just around a little bit.
Quote from: MyNameIsCharlie on January 26, 2016, 12:39:41 AMEli. Move on to someone else. Find someone who does reciprocate. Trust me on this. Do not stay in this hell. I was there for a long, long time. If you don't have someone, find them. Even if they're just around a little bit.Im not stuck on one person thoI just want to be in love, with someone who loves me. And i dont have that
Quote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:42:02 AMQuote from: MyNameIsCharlie on January 26, 2016, 12:39:41 AMEli. Move on to someone else. Find someone who does reciprocate. Trust me on this. Do not stay in this hell. I was there for a long, long time. If you don't have someone, find them. Even if they're just around a little bit.Im not stuck on one person thoI just want to be in love, with someone who loves me. And i dont have thatI know exactly what you mean. My advice remains the same. Find Mrs Right now, instead of holding out for Mrs Right. Even if it lasts a day, you restore your feeling of self worth. When you get that back, you can hold out or on a bit longer.
Ive been to psychs before Theyre a waste of my time and money
Quote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:42:02 AMQuote from: MyNameIsCharlie on January 26, 2016, 12:39:41 AMEli. Move on to someone else. Find someone who does reciprocate. Trust me on this. Do not stay in this hell. I was there for a long, long time. If you don't have someone, find them. Even if they're just around a little bit.Im not stuck on one person thoI just want to be in love, with someone who loves me. And i dont have thatBefore finding that significant person, establish a strong foundation of friends. Just waiting til that one person comes along will drive you mad.
Quote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:43:41 AMIve been to psychs before Theyre a waste of my time and moneyThey're not. You've either been to bad ones or haven't bought into what they're saying and asking you.
I just got back about five minutes ago. Dunno what's going on here. But that last comment warrents a comment.All the doctors in the world can do nothing for you if you don't do things for yourself or are willing to make the effort or commitment to change.A psyche can get to the root of things. But they don't have the magic fix you button. You do.
Quote from: Kirlia on January 26, 2016, 12:39:46 AMQuote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:21:14 AMQuote from: Kal on January 26, 2016, 12:17:36 AMIt's only impossible because you're telling yourself it is.I hate my sense of humour, my habitual tendencies, the way i speak, my inability to connect with people, my physique, my voice, my awkward level of intelligence... none of which I can change.Is "incredibly low" synonymous with awkward?Fuck off
Quote from: Sandtrap on January 26, 2016, 12:46:35 AMI just got back about five minutes ago. Dunno what's going on here. But that last comment warrents a comment.All the doctors in the world can do nothing for you if you don't do things for yourself or are willing to make the effort or commitment to change.A psyche can get to the root of things. But they don't have the magic fix you button. You do.Dude how'd it go
Quote from: MyNameIsCharlie on January 26, 2016, 12:44:25 AMQuote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:42:02 AMQuote from: MyNameIsCharlie on January 26, 2016, 12:39:41 AMEli. Move on to someone else. Find someone who does reciprocate. Trust me on this. Do not stay in this hell. I was there for a long, long time. If you don't have someone, find them. Even if they're just around a little bit.Im not stuck on one person thoI just want to be in love, with someone who loves me. And i dont have thatI know exactly what you mean. My advice remains the same. Find Mrs Right now, instead of holding out for Mrs Right. Even if it lasts a day, you restore your feeling of self worth. When you get that back, you can hold out or on a bit longer.Thanks manYoure alright, you know that
Quote from: Rocketman287 on January 26, 2016, 12:45:05 AMQuote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:42:02 AMQuote from: MyNameIsCharlie on January 26, 2016, 12:39:41 AMEli. Move on to someone else. Find someone who does reciprocate. Trust me on this. Do not stay in this hell. I was there for a long, long time. If you don't have someone, find them. Even if they're just around a little bit.Im not stuck on one person thoI just want to be in love, with someone who loves me. And i dont have thatBefore finding that significant person, establish a strong foundation of friends. Just waiting til that one person comes along will drive you mad.Everyone i know goes away in the end
become enamoured in facets of that person which you do not understand instead of focusing on things you have in common.You'll find the joy of discovering a person is more powerful than cold comfort gleaned by being in synchronicity with another.
Quote from: TBlocks on January 26, 2016, 12:45:23 AMQuote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:43:41 AMIve been to psychs before Theyre a waste of my time and moneyThey're not. You've either been to bad ones or haven't bought into what they're saying and asking you.Well i can tell you that i did give an honesy effort buying into that stuffI just felt like my problems were being exasberated by putting them on spotlight. For example, i would say something that made perfect sense to me amd meant one thing, and the psych would misconstrue (through no fault of her own) that i meant something else entirelyIts just not worth the money or the time
Quote from: Kiwicake on January 26, 2016, 12:27:04 AMQuote from: Peach Turquoise on January 25, 2016, 11:30:12 PMi've never knownsameone day fruit
Quote from: Peach Turquoise on January 25, 2016, 11:30:12 PMi've never knownsame
i've never known
Or maybe not. Maybe they were telling you the truth.
One thing however, is that with docs, you need to voice your point very clearly.
"Oh, so this is all about your parents, is it?"
Quote from: Sandtrap on January 26, 2016, 12:53:37 AMOr maybe not. Maybe they were telling you the truth."Why did you want to come see a psychologist after all this time?""I really want to figure out what's wrong with me on a fundamental level so that I can do well in school, set up a bright future for myself and increase my level of communication and friendliness with my friends, peers and family. I don't want to waste my parents time or money.""Oh, so this is all about your parents, is it?"QuoteOne thing however, is that with docs, you need to voice your point very clearly.Well thats one of my problems yeah. I feel like im talking some basic shit but people dont understand what im saying. Its infuriating.
Quote from: Eli on January 26, 2016, 12:58:15 AMQuote from: Sandtrap on January 26, 2016, 12:53:37 AMOr maybe not. Maybe they were telling you the truth."Why did you want to come see a psychologist after all this time?""I really want to figure out what's wrong with me on a fundamental level so that I can do well in school, set up a bright future for myself and increase my level of communication and friendliness with my friends, peers and family. I don't want to waste my parents time or money.""Oh, so this is all about your parents, is it?"QuoteOne thing however, is that with docs, you need to voice your point very clearly.Well thats one of my problems yeah. I feel like im talking some basic shit but people dont understand what im saying. Its infuriating.What you just posted up there is a really poor example. Dude, the first place you look is the parents. Then you look at the childhood.Parents, whether they're there or not, give, fuck.... 90% of your traits to you.