How do you break up with somebody and stay friends?

Ajax · October 27, 2015, 06:46:14 AM

I have been dating somebody for a time now, but I want to end it. How do I do it, but stay friendly after? I have a lot of close friends that are also her friends and I don't want any of them to hate me or anything. What do I do?

Elegiac · October 27, 2015, 06:47:42 AM

Do it respectfully. I mean, this is pretty straightforward. Could you be more specific about which part is giving you trouble?

ExodusMae · October 27, 2015, 06:47:48 AM

First step, you date your best friend, second step, argue with them and have a really bad, messy break up, repeat 3-4 times. Step 3, come to realise that you're both retards and just stay friends for the sake of man-kind.

Jocephalopod · October 27, 2015, 06:50:54 AM

say you have a terminal illness, preferably leukemia. tell them your plans of going into the jungles of central america alone to find the true wonders of life as well as the riches that could cure you of this disease. cut out all contact with the person for a period of two months, make sure you have somewhere she cannot reach you. After two months pass, mail her a fake golden coin and your suicide note.

Ajax · October 27, 2015, 06:52:39 AM

Quote from: Elegiac on October 27, 2015, 06:47:42 AM

Do it respectfully. I mean, this is pretty straightforward. Could you be more specific about which part is giving you trouble?

I dunno, the specific words I guess

BaconShelf · October 27, 2015, 06:53:55 AM

Uh, I dunno

For me, we both wanted to end it and we'd been friends for a while beforehand so...

Nexus · October 27, 2015, 06:55:21 AM

You don't.

Elegiac · October 27, 2015, 06:56:48 AM

Quote from: The Dude on October 27, 2015, 06:52:39 AM

Quote from: Elegiac on October 27, 2015, 06:47:42 AM
Do it respectfully. I mean, this is pretty straightforward. Could you be more specific about which part is giving you trouble?

I dunno, the specific words I guess

Ah. No one can tell you what to say. And in a way, the words aren't even important. If she's canny, she'll know what you're about to say before you say it. If you care about her beyond your relationship, as a friend, as you say, she'll hear it in your voice and know it. You've simply gotta bite the bullet and stumble through it.

Ajax · October 27, 2015, 07:02:03 AM

Quote from: Elegiac on October 27, 2015, 06:56:48 AM

Quote from: The Dude on October 27, 2015, 06:52:39 AM
Quote from: Elegiac on October 27, 2015, 06:47:42 AM
Do it respectfully. I mean, this is pretty straightforward. Could you be more specific about which part is giving you trouble?

I dunno, the specific words I guess
Ah. No one can tell you what to say. And in a way, the words aren't even important. If she's canny, she'll know what you're about to say before you say it. If you care about her beyond your relationship, as a friend, as you say, she'll hear it in your voice and know it. You've simply gotta bite the bullet and stumble through it.

Alright, thanks

Elegiac · October 27, 2015, 07:22:52 AM

Quote from: The Dude on October 27, 2015, 07:02:03 AM

Quote from: Elegiac on October 27, 2015, 06:56:48 AM
Quote from: The Dude on October 27, 2015, 06:52:39 AM
Quote from: Elegiac on October 27, 2015, 06:47:42 AM
Do it respectfully. I mean, this is pretty straightforward. Could you be more specific about which part is giving you trouble?

I dunno, the specific words I guess
Ah. No one can tell you what to say. And in a way, the words aren't even important. If she's canny, she'll know what you're about to say before you say it. If you care about her beyond your relationship, as a friend, as you say, she'll hear it in your voice and know it. You've simply gotta bite the bullet and stumble through it.

Alright, thanks

Sorry if I wasn't all that helpful, good luck 👍

Coomer · October 27, 2015, 07:31:15 AM

Quote from: Nexus on October 27, 2015, 06:55:21 AM

You don't.

CoastalSet · October 27, 2015, 02:44:37 PM

Build a time machine

Elai · October 27, 2015, 03:03:52 PM

Quote from: Nexus on October 27, 2015, 06:55:21 AM

You don't.

clum clum · October 27, 2015, 03:07:57 PM

You don't. Take a shit on their doorstep and be done with it.

Solonoid · October 27, 2015, 03:37:25 PM

That's why all of my brojobs are casual and between friends.

The Lord Ruler · October 27, 2015, 03:48:35 PM

gats · October 27, 2015, 03:49:00 PM

it's pretty rare to break up with someone and then remain friends
as long as you end it on neutral ground and there's no bitchy behaviour from either party about the other it's good imo

Septy · October 27, 2015, 04:08:27 PM

Hide the body

RomanGladiator · October 27, 2015, 04:15:45 PM

"I don't think we have enough in common for a relationship, but we can still have something casual"

Sprungli · October 27, 2015, 04:35:01 PM

If they are a good friend they should understand, if they get all bitchy you are probably better off without them

The Hån · October 27, 2015, 04:35:35 PM

Just be honest, respectful, and polite.

It's all you can do.

Lord Starch · October 27, 2015, 07:28:11 PM

You don't. At least for a long time after breaking up.

Winy · October 27, 2015, 07:30:38 PM

Good luck.

SecondClass · October 27, 2015, 07:36:32 PM

People saying "you don't" have obviously never made the effort. I'm still friends with my ex and we broke up like 3 months ago.

Elegiac · October 27, 2015, 07:38:27 PM

Quote from: RomanGladiator on October 27, 2015, 04:15:45 PM

"I don't think we have enough in common for a relationship, but we can still have something casual"

You've become such a pimp these days

Dopameme · October 27, 2015, 11:02:57 PM

do it in person and with your utmost sincerity, can't go wrong with that. if she doesn't want to be friends with you, then it's her problem, not yours.