It didn't make me a worse person.
Whenever my Mother spanked me should would always say she was sorry for doing it and she would explain what I did.Did I grow up to be a sadistic psycho? Did my brother? Did any of my cousins?No.
Quote from: eggsalad on February 03, 2016, 11:02:30 PMIt didn't make me a worse person.I don't know about that.
Whenever my Mother spanked me
should would always say she was sorry for doing it and she would explain what I did.
If you were spanked as a child, do you honestly believe it made you into a better person? If so, why?Asking nobody in particular, in case someone isn't comfortable with answering.
Quote from: Ender on February 03, 2016, 11:02:03 PMWhenever my Mother spanked me should would always say she was sorry for doing it and she would explain what I did.Did I grow up to be a sadistic psycho? Did my brother? Did any of my cousins?No.I'm sure they'd be open about it if they were.
3.) they derive a perverse sense of pleasure out of inflicting pain on somebody smaller and weaker than them.
I think you're projecting at this point.
Quote from: Ender on February 03, 2016, 11:02:03 PMWhenever my Mother spanked meWell, I'm very sorry to hear that.Quoteshould would always say she was sorry for doing it and she would explain what I did.Most parents do not do this. Most parents do it for a variety of reasons--the most common being, 1.) they're too stupid to come up with other methods--even you seem to think the only alternative is to tell them to sit in a corner, which is obviously not true, 2.) they were spanked themselves, so they think it's okay as a result, and 3.) they derive a perverse sense of pleasure out of inflicting pain on somebody smaller and weaker than them.I'm not sure how much you've read about this subject.
1.) they're too stupid to come up with other methods--even you seem to think the only alternative is to tell them to sit in a corner, which is obviously not true,
Quote from: eggsalad on February 03, 2016, 11:10:59 PMI think you're projecting at this point.No. I have read this one study that links corporal punishment with pedophilia--and that's really not a very controversial hypothesis if you REALLY think about it. I'll see if I can find it.
alright, as you may know I'm shit at explaining so I'll do this a bit differently.Growing up me and my brother were spanked by my Mom and Mamaw (southern-ish way of saying grandma). Whenever we back talked or did something very bad we would get spanked and told that it was wrong to do anything of the sort. I also remember very well getting sent to sit on the steps to the basement as punishment. When I had to sit on the steps as punishment it never stuck with me the way a spanking would. A spanking taught me to avoid Doing wrong things out of the dislike with getting smacked with a hand or spatula in the according places.Now I'm going to compare it to some of my newer cousins who are very young whose parents do not spank. Theyre fucking awful to be around in every way, and I'm saying this in the most polite way possible. They scream, they push, they punch, they self centered, they talk back-showing no respect for those that are older, and more.I'm talking about 10+ people here,maps well.
Quote from: Verbatim on February 03, 2016, 11:12:53 PMQuote from: eggsalad on February 03, 2016, 11:10:59 PMI think you're projecting at this point.No. I have read this one study that links corporal punishment with pedophilia--and that's really not a very controversial hypothesis if you REALLY think about it. I'll see if I can find it.
Quote from: Yu on February 03, 2016, 11:22:23 PMQuote from: Verbatim on February 03, 2016, 11:12:53 PMQuote from: eggsalad on February 03, 2016, 11:10:59 PMI think you're projecting at this point.No. I have read this one study that links corporal punishment with pedophilia--and that's really not a very controversial hypothesis if you REALLY think about it. I'll see if I can find it.A two-line post that's very easy to read.
It honestly depends on way too many factors to claim something like this.Spanking your kid for doing something very bad (like if your kid is a teenager and they stole or something, they back talked, etc) then it's fine, it helps teaches them consequences.Spanking them if ye did something (like not doing what you told them to do immediately, leaving garbage out, etc) then they don't really deserve it.There's also a foggy line between abuse and spanking, it also depends on multiple things.
Also there are several ways to teach your kid not to do something spanking doesn't have to be one of them, something as simple as not validating their bad behavior via attention is one. I learned a bit about it in my psychology class, though I'm sure Psy could explain better.
Quote from: Yu on February 03, 2016, 11:35:13 PMAlso there are several ways to teach your kid not to do something spanking doesn't have to be one of them, something as simple as not validating their bad behavior via attention is one. I learned a bit about it in my psychology class, though I'm sure Psy could explain better.If I remember some passages from my long reads, spanking does some serious neural fuckery in kids as they grow up in certain circumstances. Depending on the scenario, let's say a kid doesn't get enough attention from their parents. But they get spanked when they do bad things. In their sub-conscious, things get reversed. They begin to associate getting spanked as an expression of love or attention.And you really don't need to look much further than that to see what happens to the kid as they grow up with that. The kid will do bad shit, and more if it, because he's now mentally fucked on the inside of his head. This would probably relate to what you're talking about because it's the opposite of not being validated.
Quote from: Sandtrap on February 03, 2016, 11:41:08 PMQuote from: Yu on February 03, 2016, 11:35:13 PMAlso there are several ways to teach your kid not to do something spanking doesn't have to be one of them, something as simple as not validating their bad behavior via attention is one. I learned a bit about it in my psychology class, though I'm sure Psy could explain better.If I remember some passages from my long reads, spanking does some serious neural fuckery in kids as they grow up in certain circumstances. Depending on the scenario, let's say a kid doesn't get enough attention from their parents. But they get spanked when they do bad things. In their sub-conscious, things get reversed. They begin to associate getting spanked as an expression of love or attention.And you really don't need to look much further than that to see what happens to the kid as they grow up with that. The kid will do bad shit, and more if it, because he's now mentally fucked on the inside of his head. This would probably relate to what you're talking about because it's the opposite of not being validated.Still depends on the kid though, I got spanked and sure I'll admit my mind is less than stellar, but I sure didn't do bad things for attention, would like to know more how it directly affects certain kids though.
When a parent intentionally hurts their kids in any fashion, this bond is ripped up and thrown in the garbage. And it can never be recovered. I don't know the finer details on this one, but it speaks for itself. Kids trust their parents, absolutely. And breaking that trust through physical violence or any kind of abuse creates heaping truckloads of potential problems, depending on the severity and the circumstances.
Spanking is for the unintelligent
