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Messages - aREALgod

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1141
The Flood / Re: Share your work stories ITT
« on: September 26, 2015, 03:44:11 PM »
Somebody threw a box at me when we were loading them.

It was too heavy. The end.

Is there more

Sauce
My friend, Steve, was holding a knife in the kitchen and slipped, the knife almost got me in the head...

Who's head did it get

1142
The Flood / Re: Share your work stories ITT
« on: September 26, 2015, 03:18:40 PM »
ive said this one quite a bit in the skype call circlejerk

i was doing handout with a coworker that was doing drive thru orders. i was supposed to leave at 10 and then rush hour came so i had to stay until the line was gone or slowed. some people left early cause of nepotism so i got kinda mad and we werent stocked fully. some woman drove up and i gave her the food and asked for sauce which i dont have (well i had very little,but lied so the line could move). i thought i closed the door, so i turned to my coworker and said "if someone asks for more shit to their order im gonna fucking kill someone".

my coworker wanted to laugh but was looking passed me and i turn around and the woman was still there. her face was hilarious.

Did you kill anyone?

1143
The Flood / Re: Share your work stories ITT
« on: September 26, 2015, 03:12:37 PM »
Somebody threw a box at me when we were loading them.

It was too heavy. The end.

Is there more

Sauce

1144
The Flood / Re: Share your work stories ITT
« on: September 26, 2015, 03:11:10 PM »
TL;DR

Go back to kindergarten and kill yourself

1145
The Flood / Share your work stories ITT
« on: September 26, 2015, 03:08:34 PM »
K so if you have any interesting stories from your job, share 'em here. Could be anything you like, from stuff out of the ordinary, dealing with stupid people, or just cool shit you do for your job. To get things started I'll post a few of my most eventful calls to date.


So I'll begin with my currently most eventful 5150 psychiatric call yet. I'm working a graveyard shift as a driver and me and my partner are dispatched at around 1am to pick up a patient at West Med Anaheim ER who's on a 5150 psychiatric hold with a history of schizophrenia. We get restraints ready in case we'll need them and proceed inside for a report from the nurse. The RN tells us the patient (she is early to mid 30's in age) isn't so much combative as seriously repetitive and confused, and really likes to move around and take off her clothes (lol). So once my partner gets all the paperwork ready, we go inside to get the lady on our gurney to take her to a mental hospital. She was sleeping but once we started releasing the hospital restraints she began to wake up, and was instantly pulling up her gown and revealing her lady parts. We try to tell her to stay still and cover herself up, but she's schizo'd out and not really paying attention too much, so we have to pull down her gown for her. Then she starts saying some super stereotypical stuff. She looks at my nametag and goes,

"Midget... Midget? Is that your name"? *she grabs my arm gently*

"Yes ma'am that's me, I'm your driver for tonight. Could you please hold still for a moment so we can move you to our gurney?" (We have to use a method called a draw sheet, where we slide the patient across from the hospital bed to the gurney because they're unable to stand or walk. She could, but once again, she was just schizo'd out, so we had to move her ourselves. She was around 225lbs plus).

"Midget, I'm doing this for you. I can see you're not saved, I'm doing this to save you. Hell is bad. You're not saved, I'm trying to help you."

"Yes ma'am, thank you. We're gonna' be sliding you over to our gurney now, okay?" *we slide her across and she now gently grabs my partner's arm, too, and looks at his nametag*

"Slash is your name? Listen Slash, I can tell you're not saved and I'm helping you. Hell is bad!"

So we restrain her because she won't stop moving around and won't stop lifting up her gown. Given she's repetitive, she continues saying things like this until we get her out to our ambulance, where things begin to turn. She had apparently been a nurse or someone in the medical profession before and was asking for some ice chips for her mouth that was apparently getting dry. Because we were already loaded and about to go, we couldn't get any ice chips for her, and I don't believe the hospital had any ready at the time anyway. This made her very agitated and she started screaming.

"I need an ice chip! My mouth is dry! I worked as a nurse I know they have ice chips!" *yelling at my partner, who's trying to take her blood pressure* "What are you doing? You're an EMT? You're incompetent! Why do you have to take it twice? You're incompetent!"

At this point her blood pressure rose because of how agitated she was, up to 157/113 (the diastolic is what had us concerned, that's high for a diastolic. Systolic BP moves around much more so it's not uncommon to see it in high and low ranges). I called out supervisor asking about transport protocols for high blood pressure (which we don't really have) because the receiving facility might not accept her with a high blood pressure. We talk to the ER nurse and they take our patient's blood pressure again in the ambulance to confirm what my partner already did twice. The patient slowly began calming down (quote - "It's okay, they're not incompetent, they just don't know what they're doing. It's okay...") and the blood pressure began to lower, so we were cleared to transport.

During the transport she went back to her "Hell is bad" slogans. My partner would call up to me saying, "Hey, Midget? You hear that?"

"Hear what?"

"She wants you to know that Hell is bad!"

"Oh, okay. Tell her I know."

When we arrive at the mental hospital she starts talking about hearing trumpets and the second coming of Jesus and the Rapture.

"Are those trumpets I hear? It's the end, it's the Rapture. Are those trumpets? J - E - S - U - S!" *she closes her eyes, sticks out her tongue, and flips the bird with both hands*

So I ask her, "Hey, who are ya' flipping off?"

"Jesus!" *I almost couldn't contain my laughter*

"Why Jesus? I thought He's supposed to be saving us right now!"

So we get a facility employee to let us in and bring her to the section she'll be going, all the while with her talking about trumpets and the end times. After they clear her for admittance, they assign her a room, but we run into a problem - our gurney won't fit through the door. It's a bariatric gurney, so it's larger and wider and made for Roman-tier sized people. We now have to carry her in on a break-away flat (this thing: http://cdn3.volusion.com/dpgcr.dshea/v/vspfiles/photos/JSA-900-2.jpg?1391945049) to get her inside her room. Carrying people, heavy people on this, is not fun, plus the fact it's risky with how active she is. We have to take unrestrain her from the gurney and restrain her to the break away flat to move her in.

We ask for help from the facility because the more hands, the better, and we need people to hold her still while we put on the restraints again. So while we were getting her prepped, about 5 employees, a mix of nurses and techs of the hospital held down her extremities while we worked to get her ready. Then, for some reason, the nurse holding the patient's right arm let go of her (extremely stupid thing to do), and I just see her hand fly straight into the side of my partner's face with a loud THWACK and a yelpish scream from him.

"Slash you okay?"

*with noticeable irritation* "Yeah I'm fine, let's just get her into her damn room." (She hit him perfectly over the ear, giving him a nasty ring and screwing up his balance). We lift her up and even with help Jesus FUCK she was heavy, and get her into her room. From there, it was the facility's responsibility. We were tired and ready for a break (it was now 3am). I start heading back out to decontaminate the gurney when I hear singing from down a hallway. I peek the corner to see who it was to find another patient already admitted spinning in circles in the middle hallway going,

"I crucify myself eeeeeeveryday! I crucify myself eeeeeverday! I crucify myself eeeeeverday!"

And that seemed to seal up the call. My partner had a nasty headache for the rest of the night and needed some time to let it settle before we could clear for any more calls. We didn't get any, so we slept for the last couple hours of the shift.

Anyways that was my most eventful 5150 so far, and have a couple other stories, but I'd like to hear some from you guys.


1146
The Flood / Re: gonna try something new
« on: September 26, 2015, 02:04:15 PM »
It's an alternate universe with an ass backwards Verbatim. What drug would you be on recreationally?

1147
The Flood / Re: this shit I just took was absolutely massive
« on: September 26, 2015, 12:09:34 PM »
This feels like a scat thread in disguise

1148
Serious / Re: Do we have a moral obligation?
« on: September 26, 2015, 12:08:59 PM »
Hitler had the right idea. Kill anyone mentally disabled and/or genetically unfit.

This is also true, retards are genetically damaging.

1149
Gaming / Re: Interest in a Sep7agooks BF4 Server [Xbone]
« on: September 25, 2015, 02:09:38 AM »
But I have BF4 for the PS4
you bought a ps4 instead of a xbox one

fucking unfriended

Kill yourself

Plus it doesn't mean I can't get an Xbone Uno in the future

1150
Serious / Re: Do we have a moral obligation?
« on: September 25, 2015, 12:45:35 AM »
If we have the means to do so, yes. They typically die young, anyway.

Uh, what? I happen across many severely handicapped people during my work, and many of them are NOT young. In fact most of them are 50 plus years old.

Oh well if you've seen some old retarded people then I guess we'll just throw statistics out the window. Nevermind that they probably weren't born that way if they've lived into their fifties, and likely suffered an injury or some other condition which caused retardation.

Nope, they were born that way. I've seen people brain damaged from injuries earlier in their lives, and they weren't dribbling idiots. They were alert but trapped in a broken body.

1151
Serious / Re: Do we have a moral obligation?
« on: September 24, 2015, 09:25:04 PM »
If we have the means to do so, yes. They typically die young, anyway.

Uh, what? I happen across many severely handicapped people during my work, and many of them are NOT young. In fact most of them are 50 plus years old.

1152
The Flood / Re: Why didn't Zod just terraform Mars in Man of Steel?
« on: September 24, 2015, 07:01:36 PM »
Because plot hole

1153
Serious / Re: Do we have a moral obligation?
« on: September 24, 2015, 07:00:51 PM »
We shouldn't give birth to them in the first place.

That doesn't answer the question. Since we DO give birth, I'm asking whether or not they should be taken care of. Whether or not we should or shouldn't give birth is irrelevant because that's how we currently are

1154
The Flood / Re: What makes you a special snowflake?
« on: September 24, 2015, 06:59:14 PM »
Im a girl.
but no really...
I don't know.

A REEL GURL

can i tuch u

1155
Gaming / Re: Interest in a Sep7agooks BF4 Server [Xbone]
« on: September 24, 2015, 06:57:45 PM »
But I have BF4 for the PS4

1156
Serious / Do we have a moral obligation?
« on: September 24, 2015, 06:55:02 PM »
K so do we have an obligation to take care of retards? I mean, I've been thinking about this lately and wondering if there's any real point in it. Now retards who are at least functional are fine, but I'm talking about those severely handicapped retards who just make stupid noises and choke on their own drool and require constant care and medical observation. They will never be productive in any sort of facet of life and only drain time and resources. Why do we keep them alive? They don't know fuck all about anything, usually have pretty significant physical defects, and just sit around at facilities shitting themselves. Sometimes I think Sparta had it right, tossing those ugly baby shits over the cliff. It took an unnecessary strain off their society. "People" who are so severely mentally handicapped are closer in relation to a dog or pet than anything else, and sometimes not even that. In fact, most animals would be smarter than them in any sort of scenario.

So what do you think? Should we take care of them?

1158
If people were in "their right mind," no one would ever have children.

LOL

1159
Serious / Re: Obama is only PRETENDING to be (retarded) a Christian
« on: September 24, 2015, 03:20:42 PM »
Honestly Trump seems the most honest out of any of the candidates, and that's exactly what we need.
After all the best thing for this country is a guy with no political experience which had four companies that went bankrupt. Since he failed four times running a company what makes him qualified to run a country which is a lot more complicated?

You are quick to point out his failures, but don't even note his successes. That says a lot about you

1160
The Flood / Re: Animals you used to kill when you were a child
« on: September 24, 2015, 03:34:35 AM »
eks dee
Humans are sentient creatures, believe it or not. I don't see what is all that humorous about it.
Did you miss my underline? Humans are sentient, but it's far from a gift. It's the opposite.

How is it not a gift? Nearly everything that has ever lived on this planet is as dumb as a bag of rocks compared to us, save for a few cephalopods, great apes, whales and dolphins - and even they don't come close to our intelligence.
You say that as if intelligence is some inherently good thing. Humans are forced to think. That's the problem. We understand death, and other species don't. We make up cosmic explanations for things when really there's just earth, flesh and bone. Other species don't need to grapple with that fact, they simply exist.

That's because you're a faggot who over thinks death and doesn't realize how great everything is

1161
Serious / Re: Best and worst presidents/prime ministers?
« on: September 24, 2015, 03:33:02 AM »
also best future president:

GARY JOHNSON
A
R
Y

J
O
H
N
S
O
N



That's a funny way to spell Donald Trump

1162
Serious / Re: Best and worst presidents/prime ministers?
« on: September 24, 2015, 03:32:30 AM »
The best prez: Easily Reagan

The worst prez: Easily Carter or Obama

1163
The Flood / Re: Kelp Forests Are So Calming
« on: September 24, 2015, 03:29:10 AM »
10/10 would crop dust

1164
Serious / Re: Obama is only PRETENDING to be (retarded) a Christian
« on: September 24, 2015, 03:27:50 AM »
Honestly Trump seems the most honest out of any of the candidates, and that's exactly what we need.

1165
The Flood / Re: Should 2015
« on: September 24, 2015, 03:25:51 AM »
Rocketman's an alcoholic

this is pretty much the darkest timeline
I don't even get how it's possible for him to turn to alcoholism in such short time.

Falling off the pedestal of Christianity is a hard fall

1166
Serious / Re: Ahmed Mohamed: the kid with the clock
« on: September 23, 2015, 02:07:31 AM »

1167
The Flood / Re: if Sep7agon was a small town
« on: September 23, 2015, 02:03:53 AM »
Same as my job now, an EMT

1168
Serious / Re: "I hate what marijuana does to my students"
« on: September 23, 2015, 01:38:37 AM »
Well guys the truth is if you do anything to enhance your enjoyment of life you're pretty much a loathsome, petty, low-tiered ingrate that doesn't know how to love life in it's singular, stale state. Play video games to have fun? Fuck you, you should know how to have fun without 'em. Go outdoors for some hiking and to enjoy the scenery? Fuck you, you shouldn't need that to make you happy. Like to listen to music and let it run with your imagination? Lazy fuck, why do you need music for anything? If you require any external sources to enhance your happiness of life you should probably just fuck off and kill yourself, because you're clearly not good enough to enjoy life straight as it is.

1169
Serious / Re: "I hate what marijuana does to my students"
« on: September 22, 2015, 01:52:31 AM »
This is serious and we're trying to have a serious discussion. Could you please tone down the immaturity?
Right, sorry.

100 trillion times.

Reported

1170
Serious / Re: "I hate what marijuana does to my students"
« on: September 22, 2015, 01:50:07 AM »
If you smoke pot, you should be shot 30,000 times in the head, to be honest.

This is serious and we're trying to have a serious discussion. Could you please tone down the immaturity?

As for the OP, the way pot influences your life is dependent on the person. Pot in responsible moderation is in no way bad at all.

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