I'm stuck in that perpetual cycle of depair that keeps me from trying to change anything because it all seems pointless. Quit my job like a year ago due to depression and dissatisfaction, and despite urgings to get another, I've never tried. Ever since my dad died (a fairly complex relationship in itself) I've been sort of lost and falling deeper into that abyss of self-loathing that I kept out of mind for years.

I'm the kind of person who brushes off personal issues behind good/dark humor and apathy, which unfortunately only pushes people away. My last girlfriend dumped me because I never took our problems and my own issues seriously, but I'm not sure what I could have done; I've got so many issues that it's best to just keep sweeping it all under the rug and pretending said issues don't exist.

A few months ago I started cutting, just to remind myself that I'm still alive and that the blood is proof of that. Always thought it was stupid, things for moronic kids to do to grab someone's attention, but it did help until I realized how fucked up it was. I've since stopped, but I can't escape those feelings that I'm not living for anything. All those times in my childhood and adolescent years where I tried killing myself aren't just things that didn't happen. Medication and hospitals don't work. I don't have any friends. I don't feel as if I have purpose.

To sum it all up, aside from a handful of internet buddies I hope to meet one day, I'm pretty much alone.

I always regret sharing this stuff. It feels whiny, goes against the light hearted person I present myself as, but I'm just looking for people who care or some measure of reassurance that I'm not alone.

hungry for pussy but also for food

Eat my heart out.

All these people saying Metro make me feel so happy; it's not a perfect story, but it's everything I'm looking for and should undeniably set the standard for post-apocalyptic world building.

I can be anything you want me to be.

What.

Even if we discovered them on some far off world, it's not like we have any means of communicating with them effectively. Chances are the discovery of another spacefaring civilization would incite fearmongering everywhere at best and worst.

Is there such a thing as too much?

Yeah, I'm pretty sure it exists here.

Chiron TL-34.

Man, Chiron was literally the funnest map with friends, though. The confusion and unpredictability only added to the enjoyment factor.

So damn close.

Water.

Just try and stop me, fag.

The normal way.

No fancy shelves, unfortunately. I've resorted to just stuffing and stacking them in my closet because there's nowhere else to put them. Add to that that many are pretty well-worn paperbacks, so I don't want to leave them where someone might damage them further.

I've got more than a hundred; eleven pictures (of varying quality because shit camera) in the spoilers below. Some books are missing due to shotty camera angles, but here's most:

Most of those I personally wouldn't recommend playing, but Metro for sure. Brilliant games.

Or if you're already intent on Dragon's Dogma, I say hold off on the PC release (assuming you have a moderately alright gaming computer).

Congratulations. Commitment is overrated.

I stand on the line of general belief in a grand, omnipotent being serving as the harbinger of creation, though religion isn't important enough in my life for me to do some serious soul searching on what my beliefs truly are aside from: Who gives a damn as long as you don't bother others with your beliefs/ideology.