Do you think I need anger management?

R o c k e t | Mythic Smash Master
 
more |
XBL: Rocketman287
PSN:
Steam: Rocketman287
ID: Rocketman287
IP: Logged

22,974 posts
I neither fear, nor despise.
When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know.I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it.

A man answered, saying "Hello."I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?"Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right f***ing number!" and the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude .

When I tracked down Robyn's correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "You're an a**hole!" and hung up.

I wrote his number down with the word 'a**hole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer.

Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an a**hole!" It always cheered me up.

When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic 'a**hole' calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi,this is John Smith from the telephone company. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?"He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an a**hole!" and hung up.

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking Spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his back window, so I wrote down his number. A couple of days later, right after calling the first a**hole (I had is number on speed dial,) I thought that I'd better call the BMW a**hole, too.

I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"He said, "Yes, it is." I asked, "Can you tell me where I can see it?" He said, "Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax. It's a yellow ranch, and the car's parked right out in front."

I asked, "What's your name?" He said, "My name is Don Hansen," I asked, "When's a good time to catch you, Don?" He said, "I'm home every evening after five."

I said, "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"

He said, "Yes?"

I said, "Don, you're an a**hole!"

Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too.

Now, when I had a problem, I had two a**holes to call.

Then I came up with an idea. I called a**hole #1. He said, "Hello." I said, "You're an a**hole!" (But I didn't hang up.) He asked, "Are you still there?" I said, "Yeah," He screamed, "Stop calling me," I said, "Make me," He asked, "Who are you?"
I said, "My name is Don Hansen." He said, "Yeah? Where do you live?" I said, "Asshole, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd

in Fairfax, a yellow ranch, I have a black Beamer parked in front." He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers." I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole," and hung up.

Then I called Asshole #2. He said, "Hello?" I said, "Hello, asshole," He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..." I said, "You'll what?" He exclaimed, "I'll kick your ***," I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now."

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover.

Then I called Channel 9 News about the gang war going down in Oaktree Blvd. in Fairfax. I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax. I got there just in time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of each other in front of six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and surrounded by a news crew.
now I feel MUCH better

Anger management REALLY DOES WORK!


Septy | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
more |
XBL: DarkestSeptagon
PSN: Fallfav
Steam:
ID: Septy
IP: Logged

12,028 posts
See you Cowgirl,
Someday, somewhere


BaconShelf | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
more |
XBL: BaconShelf
PSN:
Steam: BaconShelf
ID: BaconShelf
IP: Logged

10,737 posts
 
This is bullshit.


Nick McIntyre | Legendary Invincible!
 
more |
XBL: Nick McIntyre92
PSN: NicholasMcIntyre
Steam: Nick McIntyre
ID: Nick McIntyre
IP: Logged

3,143 posts
 
You need an anger management class.  The last time we had angry Christians, there were Crusades.  And Abortion Doctor shootings.  And bombings.

We wouldn't want you to do that


 
Mat Cauthon
| Ravens
 
more |
Nice copypasta.

I mean it.


UnwornUniform | Heroic Unstoppable!
 
more |
XBL: UnwornUniform
PSN:
Steam: UnwornUniform
ID: UnwornUniform
IP: Logged

1,979 posts
Why is this so black?
And there I thought Rocket was the most normal out of everyone here.


 
gats
| alo
 
more |
XBL: goooots
PSN:
Steam: goootsby
ID: Gatsby
IP: Logged

19,293 posts
You will find out who you are not a thousand times, before you ever discover who you are. I hope you find peace in yourself and learn to love instead of hate.
Go to a fly young red concert to loosen up


 
Elegiac
| Knight of the Limits
 
more |
XBL:
PSN:
Steam:
ID: Elegiac
IP: Logged

23,675 posts
tl;dr


R o c k e t | Mythic Smash Master
 
more |
XBL: Rocketman287
PSN:
Steam: Rocketman287
ID: Rocketman287
IP: Logged

22,974 posts
I neither fear, nor despise.


 
Elegiac
| Knight of the Limits
 
more |
XBL:
PSN:
Steam:
ID: Elegiac
IP: Logged

23,675 posts


 
Hahahaha very funny Zonda
| p o l l o
 
more |
XBL: banjo my honey
PSN:
Steam: BanjoKazooie
ID: ねこ
IP: Logged

18,562 posts
RIP ENDIE
This user has been blacklisted from posting on the forums. Until the blacklist is lifted, all posts made by this user have been hidden and require a Sep7agon® SecondClass Premium Membership to view.


Mmmmm Napalm | Legendary Invincible!
 
more |
XBL: Mmmmm Napalm
PSN: KeeblerElvesYaoi
Steam: KeeblerElvesYaoi
ID: Mmmmm Napalm
IP: Logged

6,177 posts
gurb
You need an anger management class.  The last time we had angry Christians, there were Crusades.  And Abortion Doctor shootings.  And bombings.

We wouldn't want you to do that

Crusades actually weren't completely unwarranted. The Muslims had been attacking Christians in the Mediterranean for some time.


 
True Turquoise
| MILF Hunter
 
more |
XBL: Anora Whisper
PSN: True_Turquoise
Steam: truturquoise
ID: True Turquoise
IP: Logged

25,382 posts
fuck you
haha