Welcome to 8:49 morning news.

Blonic the Fluxmeister · March 05, 2016, 07:48:53 AM

I'm your anchor, Pierre because my bladder's empty. Our top story this morning: a man swallowed whole by a whale yesterday escaped by running all the way to the end until he was pooped out. Now let's get a look at the weather for the day with Big Boss.

Blonic the Fluxmeister · March 05, 2016, 02:35:02 PM

I SAID NOW ONTO THE WEATHER WITH BIG BOSS.

Thun · March 05, 2016, 02:37:15 PM

Is this a comedy bit?

Solonoid · March 05, 2016, 03:08:00 PM

The other thread was better.

Mad Max · March 05, 2016, 03:11:46 PM

Quote from: Thunder on March 05, 2016, 02:37:15 PM

Is this a comedy bit?

Pretty sure it's right from a Whose Line sketch

Blonic the Fluxmeister · March 05, 2016, 06:37:44 PM

Quote from: Mad Max on March 05, 2016, 03:11:46 PM

Quote from: Thunder on March 05, 2016, 02:37:15 PM
Is this a comedy bit?
Pretty sure it's right from a Whose Line sketch

Ding ding ding, we have a weiner!

Ingy · March 05, 2016, 06:40:20 PM

Quote from: JUSTFLUXMYSHITUP on March 05, 2016, 02:35:02 PM

I SAID NOW ONTO THE WEATHER WITH BIG BOSS.

Blonic the Fluxmeister · March 05, 2016, 07:23:30 PM

Quote from: Black Ass Spiderman on March 05, 2016, 06:40:20 PM

Quote from: JUSTFLUXMYSHITUP on March 05, 2016, 02:35:02 PM
I SAID NOW ONTO THE WEATHER WITH BIG BOSS.

Thanks for the report. Now let's take a look at sports with our very own Solonoid.

Solonoid · March 05, 2016, 07:40:47 PM

Nine time super bowl champ Verbatim retired from shitposting today to focus on playing more handegg, his truest, purest love.

In other words news, PSU has been forcing sex on his wife, but it's still not rape.

Blonic the Fluxmeister · March 05, 2016, 07:44:41 PM

Quote from: Solonoid on March 05, 2016, 07:40:47 PM

Nine time super bowl champ Verbatim retired from shitposting today to focus on playing more handegg, his truest, purest love.

In other words news, PSU has been forcing sex on his wife, but it's still not rape.

Thanks for that scintillating report. I'm afraid that's all the time we have. Tune in tomorrow where we discuss how food becomes poo.

big dog · March 05, 2016, 07:56:08 PM

Fedorekd here bringing you a special emergency report. Today I will be telling you how an erection works.

Inside the penis, there are two cylindrical chambers known as the corpora cavernosa. When the individual is sexually stimulated, the brain sends a signal to the blood vessels of the penis. The arteries allow more blood to flow in while the veins close up. The pressure traps the blood within the corpora cavernosa, causing the penis to expand. Once the flow of blood stops and the veins open, the penis returns to its usual soft state.

Thanks for listening, and I'll see you next week.