I swear one of these days internet forum WWIII is going to happen on here and Cheat is either going to have to shut down the forums temporarily or for good.  It's like the community members here are ticking time bombs.   

This thread deserved the Cringiest Thread of the Year Award.

Am I cringy?

So..... I come back to pages and pages of, well, whatever happened in here. And then I look and see Strongman Sandtrap? The frack guys. Physically, I'm not in the best of shape. I go round and round in circles physically with like two months of summer work and then 8 months of couch potato winter. My head's in no better shape either. And I almost got nailed into a coffin from the flu.

If anything, should just call me stubborn. If you want to give the physical thing to somebody, give it to wolvers, if he's here. But not little old me.

I meant strongest in any area. You fought that disease like a champ.

Your the strongest bro

So..... I come back to pages and pages of, well, whatever happened in here. And then I look and see Strongman Sandtrap? The frack guys. Physically, I'm not in the best of shape. I go round and round in circles physically with like two months of summer work and then 8 months of couch potato winter. My head's in no better shape either. And I almost got nailed into a coffin from the flu.

If anything, should just call me stubborn. If you want to give the physical thing to somebody, give it to wolvers, if he's here. But not little old me.

Oh that reminds me. Do you need  a recap on what happened since you went under?

Quote from: Sandtrap on October 13, 2014, 10:03:54 PM

So..... I come back to pages and pages of, well, whatever happened in here. And then I look and see Strongman Sandtrap? The frack guys. Physically, I'm not in the best of shape. I go round and round in circles physically with like two months of summer work and then 8 months of couch potato winter. My head's in no better shape either. And I almost got nailed into a coffin from the flu.

If anything, should just call me stubborn. If you want to give the physical thing to somebody, give it to wolvers, if he's here. But not little old me.

Oh that reminds me. Do you need  a recap on what happened since you went under?

I seem to be up to relative speed. Swear words are now swiped with something else. Meta did something. Kiyo is now a snake lady instead of a spider lady. Psychologist turned from yellow into orange. And there's a pink guy running around with ramen noodles who may or may not be a bastard child of Cheat's.

Quote from: Jocephalopod on October 13, 2014, 10:05:58 PM

Quote from: Sandtrap on October 13, 2014, 10:03:54 PM

So..... I come back to pages and pages of, well, whatever happened in here. And then I look and see Strongman Sandtrap? The frack guys. Physically, I'm not in the best of shape. I go round and round in circles physically with like two months of summer work and then 8 months of couch potato winter. My head's in no better shape either. And I almost got nailed into a coffin from the flu.

If anything, should just call me stubborn. If you want to give the physical thing to somebody, give it to wolvers, if he's here. But not little old me.

SHUT THE FUK UP AND ACCEPT OUR PRAISE

Nein. Nothing to praise me for. Praise means something to look up to. I'm just little old me. I get sick, I have doubts, I feel sad, and most of all, I falter.

Quote from: Sandtrap on October 13, 2014, 10:12:03 PM

Quote from: Jocephalopod on October 13, 2014, 10:05:58 PM

Quote from: Sandtrap on October 13, 2014, 10:03:54 PM

So..... I come back to pages and pages of, well, whatever happened in here. And then I look and see Strongman Sandtrap? The frack guys. Physically, I'm not in the best of shape. I go round and round in circles physically with like two months of summer work and then 8 months of couch potato winter. My head's in no better shape either. And I almost got nailed into a coffin from the flu.

If anything, should just call me stubborn. If you want to give the physical thing to somebody, give it to wolvers, if he's here. But not little old me.

SHUT THE FUK UP AND ACCEPT OUR PRAISE

Nein. Nothing to praise me for. Praise means something to look up to. I'm just little old me. I get sick, I have doubts, I feel sad, and most of all, I falter.

See? You praised me and I disappointed you. Case proven and closed in one shot.

Shall I apply to be the most looked over?

>this thread

Quote from: TBlocks on October 13, 2014, 10:05:26 PM

Quote from: Sandtrap on October 13, 2014, 10:03:54 PM

So..... I come back to pages and pages of, well, whatever happened in here. And then I look and see Strongman Sandtrap? The frack guys. Physically, I'm not in the best of shape. I go round and round in circles physically with like two months of summer work and then 8 months of couch potato winter. My head's in no better shape either. And I almost got nailed into a coffin from the flu.

If anything, should just call me stubborn. If you want to give the physical thing to somebody, give it to wolvers, if he's here. But not little old me.

Oh that reminds me. Do you need  a recap on what happened since you went under?

I seem to be up to relative speed. Swear words are now swiped with something else. Meta did something. Kiyo is now a snake lady instead of a spider lady. Psychologist turned from yellow into orange. And there's a pink guy running around with ramen noodles who may or may not be a bastard child of Cheat's.

we also have a new admin, in case ya didn't see that

What award have I earned?

This thread surely went somewhere...

Would it be wrong to blame you?

Quote from: True Turquoise on October 13, 2014, 10:26:58 PM

This thread surely went somewhere...

Would it be wrong to blame you?

Don't even talk to my loli.

Quote from: DAS B00T x2 on October 13, 2014, 10:28:41 PM

Quote from: Kinder Swageington on October 13, 2014, 10:28:05 PM

Quote from: True Turquoise on October 13, 2014, 10:26:58 PM

This thread surely went somewhere...

Would it be wrong to blame you?

Back up off my doggy, son.

Tru is not some common rabble

Me and Waifu gonna lay the fucking smack down soon

Quote from: Sandtrap on October 13, 2014, 10:12:03 PM

Quote from: Jocephalopod on October 13, 2014, 10:05:58 PM

Quote from: Sandtrap on October 13, 2014, 10:03:54 PM

So..... I come back to pages and pages of, well, whatever happened in here. And then I look and see Strongman Sandtrap? The frack guys. Physically, I'm not in the best of shape. I go round and round in circles physically with like two months of summer work and then 8 months of couch potato winter. My head's in no better shape either. And I almost got nailed into a coffin from the flu.

If anything, should just call me stubborn. If you want to give the physical thing to somebody, give it to wolvers, if he's here. But not little old me.

SHUT THE FUK UP AND ACCEPT OUR PRAISE

Nein. Nothing to praise me for. Praise means something to look up to. I'm just little old me. I get sick, I have doubts, I feel sad, and most of all, I falter.

you're doing it again....


most of this forum looks up to you, even if you've had a shitty life you set a standard most people can't live up to.

I am serious though. Praise leaves you open to disappointment when your object of said praise falters and fails. I don't want to set standards or gold bars for others to follow, because it would make it that much harder for me when one day I inevitably failed, and the people who praised or "looked up to me" where there for it.

I'm going to be level with you here, right now. Because in my time in the hospital, I spent a lot of time looking at myself. I asked a lot of questions, and found a lot of answers. And I know where I need to go now. But I'll tell you here and now anyway.

I didn't nearly die because I was sick. I nearly died because of what drives me, deep down inside. It's kept me going all these years. It pulled me out of my depression, when I needed a reason to fight. And it's been the reason I've made so much progress over the years. But now, if I let it, it will kill me.

Deep down in me, my sole reason for doing what I do, everything I've ever done, was my family. But not just that. My reason for all of it, is that I believe I'm a failure. And I will take back every year, every month, every week, day, minute, down to the very last second of time that I've wasted with my life, and the pain I inflicted and caused others due to my selfishness and laziness, and I will give it all back to them.

I will destroy myself physically for this. If I can stand, then I will stand, and I will move, regardless of what that means for me. And that's what I did. I should have gone to the hospital earlier. But I worked. I stood up, and I went out there, and I worked. I added money onto my personal savings, of 10,000 dollars, and I gave it all away to make sure that my mother's home and workplace was stabilized.

But I understand it now. I know that I have to break it. I have to start looking at myself as a person, with something to lose, and something to gain. I have to create value, and give a life to myself outside of this. I will continue to help them, always. But I need to do more than that. I need to give value to the one thing that I never cared about, and that was me.

And that's what I'm going to try to do now. But, like I said, praise leaves you open. Looking up to someone, leaves you open. And one day, I will stumble. I will make a mistake. And the backlash that will come of that, is something I don't want to see happen to anybody who does look up to me.

Your praise of me, the flawed person that I am, is the very thing I stand against. Because in my life, people loved me. They cared about me. Cared for me. And I let them down. I did more than that. And it's the reason why I push myself beyond injuries and debilitating things. Because I owe them that. The world owes them that.