The Mummy 2017

Ian | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Don't go see this shit show. What a tragic fucking waste of Tom Cruise.

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Mike has the whole thing right, you'll end up laughing at moments that are meant to be taken seriously, you might annoy people in the theater. The Boss Baby came out back in March so it unfortunately doesn't get to take shittiest summer movie of 2017, but the good news is The Mummy came out so the void is now filled. I don't see anything else coming out before September that can seriously take its spot.

Here's hoping we have something to laugh at in 2019 with the Bride of Frankenstein reboot.

 
Dietrich Six | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Excuse me, I'm full of dog poison
No Fraser no wayser

Solonoid | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Jono | Future Nostalgia
 
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Goodness gracious, great balls of lightning!

Solonoid | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Looks like Tom Cruise really fucked Brendan's franchise up.

 
Ian | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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He was the only somewhat-okay thing about the movie and even then it was mediocre. I think he did the best he could with what he was given. This was just a flop waiting to happen regardless of who the lead was.

And the thing is, with all the terrible decisions the studio made, having Tom Cruise was the smartest thing they could have done. "Muh foreign market!"

Quote from: Coca-Cola on June 13, 2017, 03:32:36 PM
Looks like Tom Cruise really fucked Brendan's franchise up.

 
Solonoid | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Quote from: Ian on June 13, 2017, 03:37:14 PM
He was the only somewhat-okay thing about the movie and even then it was mediocre. I think he did the best he could with what he was given. This was just a flop waiting to happen regardless of who the lead was.

And the thing is, with all the terrible decisions the studio made, having Tom Cruise was the smartest thing they could have done. "Muh foreign market!"

Quote from: Coca-Cola on June 13, 2017, 03:32:36 PM
Looks like Tom Cruise really fucked Brendan's franchise up.
It's a meme don't overthink it.

 
Ian | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Wait, was The Mummy really all that popular beforehand? I watched the original and I honestly thought it was just "Meh".

 
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Specific time link refuses to work, skip to 30:03

 
Verbatim | Komm, süßer Tod
 
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>waste of tom cruise

i bet the only reason you like tom cruise is because of edge of tomorrow

 
Ian | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Haven't seen that. I liked him in Valkyrie and TLS, although I don't remember much about either films.

Quote from: Verbatim on June 13, 2017, 03:44:13 PM
i bet the only reason you like tom cruise is because of edge of tomorrow

 
 
Verbatim | Komm, süßer Tod
 
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Quote from: Ian on June 13, 2017, 03:47:02 PM
Haven't seen that. I liked him in Valkyrie and TLS, although I don't remember much about either films.
well it's based on some light novel so that means you have to see it

it was well-received too

 
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JUST

 
Ian | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Yeah I heard good things about it from my friends, so its been on my bucket list for a while.

Quote from: Verbatim on June 13, 2017, 03:49:37 PM
well it's based on some light novel so that means you have to see it

it was well-received too

 
 
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"With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censured, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably."
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Quote from: Ian on June 13, 2017, 02:15:04 PM
Don't go see this shit show. What a tragic fucking waste of Tom Cruise.


AS IF Tom Cruise isn't a William Shatner esque joke with the acting ability of a pinecone

at least Shatner embraces his terribleness and does tongue in cheek stuff with it

 
 
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at least his opinions on psychiatry are 100% on-point

 
Solonoid | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Quote from: Ian on June 13, 2017, 03:43:29 PM
Wait, was The Mummy really all that popular beforehand? I watched the original and I honestly thought it was just "Meh".
Absolutely.

The '32 and '99 versions are cult classics.

 
 
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"With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censured, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably."
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Quote from: Verbatim on June 13, 2017, 03:58:31 PM
at least his opinions on psychiatry are 100% on-point
#XenuDidNothingWrong

 
Turkey | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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The Mummy (1999) is one of my favorite movies. Chris Pratt is basically the reincarnation of early 00s Brendan Fraser.

 
 
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"With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censured, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably."
—Judge Aaron Satie
——Carmen
Crisp rat's kush pate


 
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Quote from: Ian on June 13, 2017, 02:15:04 PM
I don't see anything else coming out before September that can seriously take its spot.
Trans5mers is coming out next week.

I wonder if they'll try to sweep this one under the rug like Dracula Untold, or just keep going.

 
 
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Goodness gracious, great balls of lightning!
Quote from: WarTurkey on June 13, 2017, 04:14:22 PM
The Mummy (1999) is one of my favorite movies.
Look what I got!

Mordo | Mythic Invincible!
 
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emigrate or degenerate. the choice is yours
Did anyone seriously think it was going to be good?

The whole action/horror-lite hybrid genre has never worked.

Every time a movie is trying to set up a shared universe/franchise type deal to try and desperately catch the crumbs of the MCU it's almost always going to fail. Avengers worked because it was built up organically. If you place too much emphasis on making a cinematic universe the actual film making takes a backseat and you end up with a dogshit movie.
Last Edit: June 14, 2017, 10:20:26 AM by Mordo

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Did he say glass of juice or gas the Jews?
👶🏽:h..

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I figured it was going to be shit due to Tom Cruise being in it. I know him being a Scientologist doesn't reflect his acting or the movies he's in, but I can't take him nor his movies seriously due to it.

 
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I could pretty much tell, what with the direction they were going with with Tom Cruise getting mummy powers, but is it at least okay background noise, or would you say it's bad at even that?

 
Ian | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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If there is absolutely nothing else (and I mean NOTHING) then it would be, but I would try to find SOMETHING else instead.

"THIS WASN'T TO KEEP PEOPLE OUT...IT WAS TO KEEP SOMETHING IIIINNNN!!!!!!!!"

Quote from: Ushan on June 13, 2017, 09:39:39 PM
but is it at least okay background noise, or would you say it's bad at even that?

 
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Quote from: Ian on June 13, 2017, 09:43:51 PM
If there is absolutely nothing else (and I mean NOTHING) then it would be, but I would try to find SOMETHING else instead.

"THIS WASN'T TO KEEP PEOPLE OUT...IT WAS TO KEEP SOMETHING IIIINNNN!!!!!!!!"

Quote from: Ushan on June 13, 2017, 09:39:39 PM
but is it at least okay background noise, or would you say it's bad at even that?

Fair enough.