Little more thinking here. I had a friend of mine stop by today. Stopped in town to go to the hospital because he thought he broke something. Sat down with him for a coffee, and talked a bit. And, he's feeling a little blue. Because we're looking at the inevitable here.

Let's face it, no matter what you do, who you are, death is always on your head. Always there, just waiting. But here's the thing. I'm 22. And at least once a year I bump into an event or two that has me close. Just a few ticks out of line and I'd be dead surprise big not. This year it was a respitory infection and getting hit by a truck. Last year was sliding on the ice towards an oncoming semi. I was so fucking close I could've nicked my driver side mirror against it.

Point is, I've danced around with death a little bit. And I accept that. Most of all, I'm aware that it can show up, at any time. So, I'm okay with that. But what if it doesn't? What if, I live a longer life? What if I make something, start a family, and all that, and one day I have to face the end of the road willingly?

Personally, I'll wait and see. But this friend of mine, doesn't have that option. He's 70. The average male lifespan nowadays is 80-85. So, let's say 15 years. 15 years for me is a long time. 15 years, when you're 70, isn't. It goes by like a snap.

And that's what's got him down. Because, no matter how healthy you are, no matter how non average you are, and let me tell you this guy is non-average in terms of being in shape for his age, considering he works alongside me, is the fact that random things always get you.

Personally, I don't think he'll kick the bucket anytime soon. But it still doesn't change the potential for things. 15 years, to a 70 year old isn't enough time. Especially not with what he's up to. And so the question is, why bother? Why bother fighting for that small sliver of time left, when you could just take a shortcut?

I have no answers. I have no thoughts that allow me to say anything remotely cheerful, or helpful. Because this a different inevitability than the kind that I accept. I accept being fucked over by the random throes that life has to offer. I will do the best I can, but I know that I can't keep dodging bullets forever.

But my friend, is at the end of the road, or at the very least, near it. And who wants to to face the end of the road? Who wants to turn back, on their regrets, their triumphs, their failures, and leave it all behind?

As the doc said, "as you get older, it's only going to get harder."

Good motivation there doc. But, he's right. It never does get any easier does it?

So!

That's why I offered the best I always can. It only gets harder when you do it alone. But, so long as I'm still knocking around, being alone will not be an issue.

Remember that gentlemen. All the stubbornness in the world might do you some good. But you have to accept the inevitability that you can't do it alone forever.

So when that happens, I hope you have someone to stand with you. Or, you have the kindness to stand up for them.

Agreed.

At the end of the day, we're all going to die eventually.

But the point is, you don't have to do it alone. You shouldn't have to. I'm content in the knowledge that it isn't something I can fight. It comes with life itself. I hope that on the other side, if there is one, that there's another realm of sorts, something beyond our simple earth bound mortal perspective on things, like a transcendance of sorts, or merging.

But I can't say it until I've seen it. So for all intents, I assume that the chance I have here is all I have. So, with this chance that I have, I will do the best I can to make things better for those around me! And along the way, see if I can enjoy my own ride.