If I'm reading this right... you came across someone who's inaction you regard as an important factor of one of your bouts of depression and this resurfaced some kind of emotion that manifests itself as anger towards him because how dare we come back to your life now?
I think your focusing on yourself too much here. I know I'm going to sound like a dick but it's just something that I've learned personally and I feel I should share it. I think that in all these years of you being to yourself, you've neglected to realize that life still goes on whether or not yours is ending. Of course they have changed in the time they were gone. :/ they've been living their own life and growing. Also it's probably not that they didnt have the guys to tell you to fuck off them self. They might not have been there to grab the phone and their father was tired of you calling? Try to see things from other people's perspective and things make more sense. I remember a girl that I used to like a lot. I drove a couple hours away multiple times just to hang out at her place and chill. We did quite a few things together and I was one of her few friends who was there for her to just talk and listen during some of her hardest times. I worried about her often and I messaged her daily. But one day she stopped talking to me. For weeks I felt depressed like she cheated me from something great I had. Then I realized I wouldn't let someone have that much control of my happiness like that again. I thought about it and recognized that she does have her own life and can't always be there to talk to me and it was unfair to expect her to. I don't hate her for it anymore. It just happens. There's a point when we all need to move on. As hard as it is, if we take the picture off ourselves for a change, things make more sense and the situation feels less dire than it actually is. Sorry if I sound like a jerk but it's just a different type of awareness I'm trying to show you.
I've experienced your feelings a lot, and it's only in retrospect that I can post this.
Quote from: DigitalIZesty on September 19, 2014, 12:21:40 PMI've experienced your feelings a lot, and it's only in retrospect that I can post this.At least I know I'll laugh at the fucking bankers when they come to seize my fucking house and job because I was expecting them.
Quote from: Sandtrap on September 19, 2014, 12:25:37 PMQuote from: DigitalIZesty on September 19, 2014, 12:21:40 PMI've experienced your feelings a lot, and it's only in retrospect that I can post this.At least I know I'll laugh at the fucking bankers when they come to seize my fucking house and job because I was expecting them.Seek help
Quote from: PSU on September 19, 2014, 12:53:48 PMQuote from: Sandtrap on September 19, 2014, 12:25:37 PMQuote from: DigitalIZesty on September 19, 2014, 12:21:40 PMI've experienced your feelings a lot, and it's only in retrospect that I can post this.At least I know I'll laugh at the fucking bankers when they come to seize my fucking house and job because I was expecting them.Seek helpThere is none. But I have one last trump card to play if things are about to tumble.
Quote from: Sandtrap on September 19, 2014, 12:55:39 PMQuote from: PSU on September 19, 2014, 12:53:48 PMQuote from: Sandtrap on September 19, 2014, 12:25:37 PMQuote from: DigitalIZesty on September 19, 2014, 12:21:40 PMI've experienced your feelings a lot, and it's only in retrospect that I can post this.At least I know I'll laugh at the fucking bankers when they come to seize my fucking house and job because I was expecting them.Seek helpThere is none. But I have one last trump card to play if things are about to tumble.And that is?
Quote from: DAS B00T x2 on September 19, 2014, 02:18:59 PMQuote from: Sandtrap on September 19, 2014, 12:55:39 PMQuote from: PSU on September 19, 2014, 12:53:48 PMQuote from: Sandtrap on September 19, 2014, 12:25:37 PMQuote from: DigitalIZesty on September 19, 2014, 12:21:40 PMI've experienced your feelings a lot, and it's only in retrospect that I can post this.At least I know I'll laugh at the fucking bankers when they come to seize my fucking house and job because I was expecting them.Seek helpThere is none. But I have one last trump card to play if things are about to tumble.And that is?Thats personnel kid.
Quote from: DigitalIZesty on September 19, 2014, 02:19:35 PMQuote from: DAS B00T x2 on September 19, 2014, 02:18:59 PMQuote from: Sandtrap on September 19, 2014, 12:55:39 PMQuote from: PSU on September 19, 2014, 12:53:48 PMQuote from: Sandtrap on September 19, 2014, 12:25:37 PMQuote from: DigitalIZesty on September 19, 2014, 12:21:40 PMI've experienced your feelings a lot, and it's only in retrospect that I can post this.At least I know I'll laugh at the fucking bankers when they come to seize my fucking house and job because I was expecting them.Seek helpThere is none. But I have one last trump card to play if things are about to tumble.And that is?Thats personnel kid.and this thread wasn't?
Sandtrap, it sounds like you need the Flood in your life IRL. Why must we all live so far away?