This is when you sit down to crap, strain to get it out,  feel your asshole stretch to un fathomable sizes, only to wipe and see no shit on the paper. Then you stand up and see nothing in the bowl.

Tell us of your encounters with the ghost turd

Please get permabanned

The three of you take the Internet way too seriously. I understand, I used to do the same. But go out, get lives.  If not for the rest of us, do it for yourselves.

Jokes on you pal. I just don't share your sense of humor.

You don't need to.

please drown in your toilet.

I tried 

It didn't work 

this thread is turd that's why you had to adopt.

And yet... Strangely... My jimmies remain unrustled...