It feels like I've been alone to long with no girls around my mom was wonderin'
Thinking of some way to release it
I looked in the kitchen saw some Crisco oil and that's when my blood started to boil
Oh yeah
Oww, oww, oww
Aw oh
Oww, oww, oww
God what did I just do

No one wanted to be with me
Had to make my dream come true
I wanted to have something
I didn't know what to do
It seemed like a good idea
And no one else was around
I stuck my weenie in a bottle
And now I can't get it out
I stuck my weenie in a bottle today
Got it stuck up there all the way
I stuck my weenie in a bottle oh no
Can't, can't someone come help me out

It's turning purple all the feelings gone
Now where did I put that frigin' phone
Dialing 911
Please pick up I'm in a lot of pain
This was supposed to feel good know I'm suffering
Oh please answer
Denver 911 what is your emergency
Oww, oww, oww
Hello
Oww, oww, oww
Sir what seems to be the problem
No one wanted to be with me
Had to make my dream come true
I wanted to have something
I didn't know what to do
Go on
It seemed like a good idea
And no one else was around
I stuck my weenie in a bottle and now I can't get it out

So you stuck your weenie in a bottle oh my
You must feel really lonely guy
You stuck your weenie in a bottle that's a first
Don't worry sir were sending somebody out
Hey Pam this guy got his weenie stuck in a bottle
No way
He does
He's such a loser
Wait
Wait sir were sending somebody out
ahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha
He's in here lets break the door down
Oh my god
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA