I feel my friend is ignoring me

Ian · March 08, 2016, 10:18:26 PM

I don't like blogging but I feel I have to in this case.

I have a friend that I used to chat with almost nightly, however at the turn of the year they've been very busy. It went from them always starting a conversation with me to me starting them every once in a while. I was very open with them about a lot of my personal life, and they told me I could talk to them about anything. They were the first real friend I had in a very long time. However recently I haven't been able to talk with them. I try to talk with them and I just get silence. I know they're busy, but I just feel like there's something else. A simple "I'm busy" or "I don't want to talk" would even be okay but I can't get anything at all.

I don't know what to do. I don't know if I did something wrong, or that if they just don't want to talk to me right now, or if there's something else, but not knowing is scary and it hurts. I'm so sick of losing friends I consider close while they move on and I stay left behind. I don't want to lose another one, but it hurts so much. I lose sleep over it, I can't work without in the back of my mind, I can't enjoy the things I used to enjoy because it's happened so many times and I don't want it to happen again with them.

I'm so terrified right now and it hurts so much, and I can't do anything unless I get this resolved but I can't because I don't even know if I did anything wrong or what I should do to fix it, and I'm so lost now. I need advice.

Korra · March 08, 2016, 10:21:12 PM

Can you repeat that again? I wasn't reading.

Jive Turkey · March 08, 2016, 10:23:55 PM

ITT: Shit that doesn't actually happen

Coomer · March 08, 2016, 10:25:49 PM

Poor boi
Just bring it up directly and address it instead of stressing about it in the dark

Jocephalopod · March 08, 2016, 10:26:04 PM

find the person and address the issue in berson

Ian · March 08, 2016, 10:27:23 PM

I would if I could, but I can't even get their attention anymore. I would like to keep this thread up in a desperate attempt to get them to notice.

Quote from: Precious Tritium on March 08, 2016, 10:25:49 PM

Just bring it up directly and address it instead of stressing about it in the dark

They live all the way up north.

Quote

find the person and address the issue in berson

Jocephalopod · March 08, 2016, 10:32:06 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 10:27:23 PM

I would if I could, but I can't even get their attention anymore. I would like to keep this thread up in a desperate attempt to get them to notice.

Quote from: Precious Tritium on March 08, 2016, 10:25:49 PM
Just bring it up directly and address it instead of stressing about it in the dark

They live all the way up north.

Quote
find the person and address the issue in berson

wait they use sep7agon.gov?

Ian · March 08, 2016, 10:33:28 PM

I don't want to cause any more trouble for them than I already have, but this was my last resort.

Quote from: Jocephalopod on March 08, 2016, 10:32:06 PM

Coomer · March 08, 2016, 10:41:46 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 10:27:23 PM

I would if I could, but I can't even get their attention anymore. I would like to keep this thread up in a desperate attempt to get them to notice.

Tell em how bad you feel

Ian · March 08, 2016, 10:43:06 PM

I can't get a hold of them at all. I would say everything I have said if I could just get some sort of response.

Quote from: Precious Tritium on March 08, 2016, 10:41:46 PM

Tell em how bad you feel

Coomer · March 08, 2016, 10:45:32 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 10:43:06 PM

I can't get a hold of them at all. I would say everything I have said if I could just get some sort of response.

Quote from: Precious Tritium on March 08, 2016, 10:41:46 PM
Tell em how bad you feel

They ignore your calls and texts?

Ian · March 08, 2016, 10:46:46 PM

I don't have their number to call, but I'll send a message to get their attention and I get nothing back. It couldn't be just a matter of them being too busy, I see them active elsewhere.

Quote from: Precious Tritium on March 08, 2016, 10:45:32 PM

They ignore your calls and texts?

Coomer · March 08, 2016, 10:48:15 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 10:46:46 PM

I don't have their number to call, but I'll send a message to get their attention and I get nothing back. It couldn't be just a matter of them being too busy, I see them active elsewhere.

Quote from: Precious Tritium on March 08, 2016, 10:45:32 PM
They ignore your calls and texts?

:[

That sucks bro

Solonoid · March 08, 2016, 10:51:48 PM

Quote from: Jocephalopod on March 08, 2016, 10:32:06 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 10:27:23 PM
I would if I could, but I can't even get their attention anymore. I would like to keep this thread up in a desperate attempt to get them to notice.

Quote from: Precious Tritium on March 08, 2016, 10:25:49 PM
Just bring it up directly and address it instead of stressing about it in the dark

They live all the way up north.

Quote
find the person and address the issue in berson

wait they use sep7agon.gov?

it's noel

Ian · March 08, 2016, 10:51:48 PM

I didn't want to cause them trouble by making this thread, but it's been so painful and I want them to at least know whatever is going on that I still care about them and the last thing I want is to lose their friendship. I just hoped that they would know that before this thread is bumped into oblivion.

Quote from: Precious Tritium on March 08, 2016, 10:48:15 PM

:[

That sucks bro

Noel doesn't post on here.

Quote

it's noel

Jive Turkey · March 08, 2016, 10:52:54 PM

Make new friends

Ian · March 08, 2016, 10:54:04 PM

I don't replace friends like defective hardware. What good is a new friendship if I can't save an old one?

Quote from: Jive Turkey on March 08, 2016, 10:52:54 PM

Make new friends

Epsira · March 08, 2016, 11:13:40 PM

How ambitious is this person?

Ian · March 08, 2016, 11:14:18 PM

I don't understand the question.

Quote from: Epsira on March 08, 2016, 11:13:40 PM

How ambitious is this person?

Epsira · March 08, 2016, 11:17:42 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 11:14:18 PM

I don't understand the question.

Quote from: Epsira on March 08, 2016, 11:13:40 PM
How ambitious is this person?

Do you think they're busy because their goals demand a lot of their time?
Would you like me to respond in a similar quoting format?

Ian · March 08, 2016, 11:19:51 PM

I would think so, they don't post as often on here as they did. However, I'm sure they have the time to just write "I'm super busy". I'm pretty sure there's more to it than just that.

Quote from: Epsira on March 08, 2016, 11:17:42 PM

Do you think they're busy because their goals demand a lot of their time?
Would you like me to respond in a similar quoting format?

Epsira · March 08, 2016, 11:22:13 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 11:19:51 PM

I would think so, they don't post as often on here as they did. However, I'm sure they have the time to just write "I'm super busy". I'm pretty sure there's more to it than just that.

Quote from: Epsira on March 08, 2016, 11:17:42 PM
Do you think they're busy because their goals demand a lot of their time?
Would you like me to respond in a similar quoting format?

When they use the site, do they do so compulsively?

Ian · March 08, 2016, 11:24:24 PM

If by compulsive you mean they post like say Verbatim or Jester? No, but they certainly do post with genuine interest to the community.

Quote from: Epsira on March 08, 2016, 11:22:13 PM

When they use the site, do they do so compulsively?

Solonoid · March 08, 2016, 11:25:05 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 10:51:48 PM

I didn't want to cause them trouble by making this thread, but it's been so painful and I want them to at least know whatever is going on that I still care about them and the last thing I want is to lose their friendship. I just hoped that they would know that before this thread is bumped into oblivion.

Quote from: Precious Tritium on March 08, 2016, 10:48:15 PM
:[

That sucks bro

Noel doesn't post on here.

Quote
it's noel

Well, she hasn't in a while, but she does.

Epsira · March 08, 2016, 11:32:31 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 11:24:24 PM

If by compulsive you mean they post like say Verbatim or Jester? No, but they certainly do post with genuine interest to the community.

Quote from: Epsira on March 08, 2016, 11:22:13 PM
When they use the site, do they do so compulsively?

As someone who blows off their friends periodically I'm familiar with being both busy and not wanting to talk to other people. At all. I'm not sure how misanthropic your friend is though, so I really don't know I'm commenting from a point of similarity.
Maybe you did something to upset them?
You said you've lost friends in the past, do you suspect a cause?

Solonoid · March 08, 2016, 11:37:28 PM

Here's an idea, why don't you just fucking tell us who it is?

Ian · March 08, 2016, 11:38:43 PM

They don't come off as misanthropic at all.

All of them were simply them doing something different. The first few simply moved and they never bothered to stay in contact, the last two was probably the most painful with one telling me they don't want to keep friends they made from before and the other simply got an SO and never cared to make the time for me and after a long struggle I gave up.

I don't want it to happen again. If I did something wrong I am more than willing to admit my wrong doing, even if this thread isn't humbling enough. I just want them to know I'm still thinking of them, and that in the past six months they were the silver lining in all the negative experiences I've had. Regardless of the fact that our friendship has only been online, they were the closest friend I've had I shared with them more than I'm willing to share almost anybody. If I lose them, I don't think I'll be able to trust people anymore.

Quote from: Epsira on March 08, 2016, 11:32:31 PM

As someone who blows off their friends periodically I'm familiar with being both busy and not wanting to talk to other people. At all. I'm not sure how misanthropic your friend is though, so I really don't know I'm commenting from a point of similarity.
Maybe you did something to upset them?
You said you've lost friends in the past, do you suspect a cause?

If they're upset with me, why would I put myself in a situation to make them even more upset?

Quote from: Solonoid on March 08, 2016, 11:37:28 PM

Here's an idea, why don't you just fucking tell us who it is?

Jive Turkey · March 08, 2016, 11:40:27 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 10:54:04 PM

I don't replace friends like defective hardware. What good is a new friendship if I can't save an old one?

Quote from: Jive Turkey on March 08, 2016, 10:52:54 PM
Make new friends

You can have both the old friend and the new friend. Making a new friend, however, will make you less needy on the old friend

I think you're being a bit silly here man

Coomer · March 08, 2016, 11:43:21 PM

Quote from: Gaara444 on March 08, 2016, 10:51:48 PM

I didn't want to cause them trouble by making this thread, but it's been so painful and I want them to at least know whatever is going on that I still care about them and the last thing I want is to lose their friendship. I just hoped that they would know that before this thread is bumped into oblivion.

I feel you bro
I've through my fair share of friends

It happens

Ian · March 08, 2016, 11:43:28 PM

That doesn't help the current situation I'm in though. If I did something wrong to upset them, finding a new friend isn't going to change their views.

Quote from: Jive Turkey on March 08, 2016, 11:40:27 PM

You can have both the old friend and the new friend. Making a new friend, however, will make you less needy on the old friend

I think you're being a bit silly here man