At what point do you say that you're in a committed relationship?

MyNameIsCharlie | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Is it a time thing? Maybe how many dates? Something else?

I ask because in Roman's thread many of you say he's a scumbag for "cheating" on the girl he's currently pursuing.

By his admission, they've been on a handful of dates, communicate off and on via text and have only been together for a few weeks. If being together is an accurate way of saying "Seeing each other."

So, what is your standard of being in a committed relationship? Where you see one, and only one, girl until you break up?

The way some of you post, you'd think the second she gives you her number you may as well be married.


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the second she gives you her number


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When the person and you enter the relationship in the first place.


 
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MyNameIsCharlie | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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I'd really say after a person has pursued multiple dates, which Roman has. If it was a fling of one or two dates and one of them is "this isn't working out" and pursues someone else, there really isn't a problem. Roman however has gone out with the same chick a few times and then starts taking up an interest with someone else, which is pretty scummy. If he planned on saying he's done with the first chick to pursue the second before going out with her, it's whatever though. I didn't read through his most recent thread, but I remember he's tried putting chicks on the back burner to get with again when his current relationship fails, don't know if that's the case with this recent one.

So, you should only persue one at a time?


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MyNameIsCharlie | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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I'd really say after a person has pursued multiple dates, which Roman has. If it was a fling of one or two dates and one of them is "this isn't working out" and pursues someone else, there really isn't a problem. Roman however has gone out with the same chick a few times and then starts taking up an interest with someone else, which is pretty scummy. If he planned on saying he's done with the first chick to pursue the second before going out with her, it's whatever though. I didn't read through his most recent thread, but I remember he's tried putting chicks on the back burner to get with again when his current relationship fails, don't know if that's the case with this recent one.

So, you should only persue one at a time?
I'd say it's cool to do a couple of first and second dates to test the water with multiple people, but once you've shown enough interest in one person to schedule more dates, you should be invested in that relationship. To not do that just seems like one person is just being stringed along.

So on the third date.

Also, what constitutes a date? A quick coffee grab? Movies?

I ask because there could be dozens of little meetings that may or may not count as a date.


 
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I'd really say after a person has pursued multiple dates, which Roman has. If it was a fling of one or two dates and one of them is "this isn't working out" and pursues someone else, there really isn't a problem. Roman however has gone out with the same chick a few times and then starts taking up an interest with someone else, which is pretty scummy. If he planned on saying he's done with the first chick to pursue the second before going out with her, it's whatever though. I didn't read through his most recent thread, but I remember he's tried putting chicks on the back burner to get with again when his current relationship fails, don't know if that's the case with this recent one.
he's literally only had 2 dates with her


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MyNameIsCharlie | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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I could maybe see thinking committed after sex. There is a safety reason for this. Don't want to catch something and give it to her. But I think commitment doesn't really start until that unspoken agreement happens.


 
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I could maybe see thinking committed after sex. There is a safety reason for this. Don't want to catch something and give it to her. But I think commitment doesn't really start until that unspoken agreement happens.

I like her a lot and we have this chemistry when we meet, kissed and hugged each other when we met again Friday night. Then NSFW
Spoiler
we went into her car after the movie and well, I fingered her and sucked her tits, and she touched my cock
She's crazy, she wanted to be touched in the theater when there were other people around, I had to stop her and say no.


MyNameIsCharlie | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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I could maybe see thinking committed after sex. There is a safety reason for this. Don't want to catch something and give it to her. But I think commitment doesn't really start until that unspoken agreement happens.

I like her a lot and we have this chemistry when we meet, kissed and hugged each other when we met again Friday night. Then NSFW
Spoiler
we went into her car after the movie and well, I fingered her and sucked her tits, and she touched my cock
She's crazy, she wanted to be touched in the theater when there were other people around, I had to stop her and say no.

Still sounds like fooling around


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When you get married
The whole point of marriage is committing 


RomanGladiator | Legendary Invincible!
 
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I could maybe see thinking committed after sex. There is a safety reason for this. Don't want to catch something and give it to her. But I think commitment doesn't really start until that unspoken agreement happens.

I like her a lot and we have this chemistry when we meet, kissed and hugged each other when we met again Friday night. Then NSFW
Spoiler
we went into her car after the movie and well, I fingered her and sucked her tits, and she touched my cock
She's crazy, she wanted to be touched in the theater when there were other people around, I had to stop her and say no.

Still sounds like fooling around
Well I want to keep seeing her. She's comforting to me, even when I put my arm around her. She said "I've missed you" too, which no one ever has.
Last Edit: March 15, 2016, 04:40:38 PM by RomanGladiator


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tbh if a woman agrees to a second date you shouldn't be playing the field.


MyNameIsCharlie | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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tbh if a woman agrees to a second date you shouldn't be playing the field.

That seems a little impossible. Know that you could be monogamous after a single date?


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tbh if a woman agrees to a second date you shouldn't be playing the field.

That seems a little impossible. Know that you could be monogamous after a single date?

Even needing to talk about exclusivity feels very high-schoolish to me. If you're going on dates, don't see other women. If you're just messing around then it's fair game.


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I personally hate being in a grey area, however I understand that you are by no means some sort of "item" after one or two dates (Dates I define as spending more than two hours alone together with the sole purpose of spending time together). At the end of the third one, I'd ask my potential partner if they would like to continue what we've been doing and if so if they would mind if it was under the term of a committed relationship. I mean, if I made it to the third date I'm clearly doing something right.

Too bad I'm not in the position to ask out Senpai.
Last Edit: March 15, 2016, 07:17:24 PM by Gaara444


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The question itself could roughly imply that I have to say and realize that I'm in a committed relationship in order to be in one. And that all other relationships are just...on the side.

Can I not simply be committed to giving my best and dedicating myself from the start? Be it with pals and friends, or people I'd like to know a little closer?


Dietrich Six | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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The question itself could roughly imply that I have to say and realize that I'm in a committed relationship in order to be in one. And that all other relationships are just...on the side.

Can I not simply be committed to giving my best and dedicating myself from the start? Be it with pals and friends, or people I'd like to know a little closer?

I think he's learning more to the monogamous aspect, not so much your level of commitment.


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So... I guess I'm going to have to pick up after your horrendous mistakes on here too?
When he or she says that you're in a committed relationship.


Dietrich Six | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Excuse me, I'm full of dog poison
You aren't in a monogamous relationship until you discuss it with the other person. Generally I wait until I really get to know a person and genuinely want to spend more time them.

Two dates is not an acceptable amount of time.
Five is generally a long enough time to make a decision, but it's a case by case basis.

Another good indication is if the person has flaked on you more than they've seen you it probably isn't worth your time.


MyNameIsCharlie | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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You aren't in a monogamous relationship until you discuss it with the other person. Generally I wait until I really get to know a person and genuinely want to spend more time them.

Two dates is not an acceptable amount of time.
Five is generally a long enough time to make a decision, but it's a case by case basis.

Another good indication is if the person has flaked on you more than they've seen you it probably isn't worth your time.

Most well rounded answer yet


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There's been several well rounded answers....

Most well rounded answer yet