My mother is pissed off, and not talking to me, for two simple reasons

 
More Than Mortal
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This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang but a whimper.
First of all, I told her I probably won't want children when I'm older.

Secondly, the two universities I've chosen both involve going abroad for a year to study.

I can see any justification for her being upset with me over these two choices I've made. Surely my life shouldn't be a surrogate for her desires, but it's at the point where day-to-day stuff is incredibly tense because she's so fucking mad at me. I put this in Serious because I want actual advice on how to diffuse the situation.

Spoiler
Yes, I've tried just talking to her about it.
Spoiler
No, it didn't work.
Spoiler
It never works.


Super Irish | Legendary Invincible!
 
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If I'm not here, I'm doing photography. Or I'm asleep. Or in lockdown. One of those three, anyway.

The current titlebar/avatar setup is just normal.
The first is a little bit understandable, but not worth getting so pissed off over.

But for the second thing? If my course had a year abroad, my parents would be proud I'm experiencing new things which is essentially what Uni is for.

It could be over-attachment for her son (you), but getting pissed at you over that is a tad too far to be just that. Over-protective, over-nurturing perhaps? Need to remember the proper word for this, but it happens a lot where the parents (particularly the mother) don't want the kids to leave, and can go to extreme lengths to stop them as what has happened to one of my friends.
Last Edit: November 15, 2014, 07:58:48 AM by SuperIrish


The Lord Ruler | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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Just give her time.


 
Sandtrap
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Rockets on my X
It's what moms do. They always get attached . When it comes down to it, it's your life, and she can't stop you. And she should understand that you need your room to expand and grow. Stand your ground, and let that be known.

Not in an insulting way, not in an angry rant. I don't know shit about your mother, but I can tell you this. Don't let her get you angry. Because then it goes into a vicious circle. As they say, keep calm, party on.

Mothers are always clingy, and they'll fight through whatever way neccessary to keep that. Most of all, you gotta remember that this is a woman we're talking about here. Not only is she clinging to her son, but change has just suddenly walked up on her doorstep.

Woman aren't non-understandable mysteries. But they do think differently. And change, abrupt change, for most of them, puts them on guard.

You just:
a) Broke one of her expectations for you
b)Dumped it on her that you'll be headed off into the big wide world soon

She's on guard big time. Personally, I always laugh at folks who say they'll never have kids in the future. The future holds a lot of tricks up its sleeves, and you can't predict them or where they'll lead. Your mom shouldn't be so flustered in that case, but I suppose, that's her way of going on guard.

It all comes down to my first point.

Make it clear that it's your life. And she needs to give you the room to grow. Not insulting, and not angry, because if you say it the wrong way, it could backfire on you BIG TIME. Just calm and easy going.

And you only need to say it once. Most of all, don't approach her bluntly. If you approach her like you're going to talk about university stuff, she'll put her walls up.

You need to do it as if it were a casual conversation.



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I don't want kids either, waaaaay too much responsibility and I plan on keeping some DWA listed animals in the future and I don't want an accident to happen. I can understand her though, she wants to be a grandmother one day, you wouldn't understand OP.

And nawwwwwwwww n.n, Meta is still his mommas little babby.


 
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I DONT GIVE A SINGLE -blam!- MOTHER -blam!-ER ITS A MOTHER -blam!-ING FORUM, OH WOW, YOU HAVE THE WORD NINJA BELOW YOUR NAME, HOW MOTHER -blam!-ING COOL, NOT, YOUR ARE NOTHING TO ME BUT A BRAINWASHED PIECE OF SHIT BLOGGER, PEOPLE ONLY LIKE YOU BECAUSE YOU HAVE NINJA BELOW YOUR NAME, SO PLEASE PUNCH YOURAELF IN THE FACE AND STAB YOUR EYE BECAUSE YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A PIECE OF SHIT OF SOCIETY
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More Than Mortal
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This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang but a whimper.
She doesn't want you to go.
Then she gotta
YouTube


 
challengerX
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I DONT GIVE A SINGLE -blam!- MOTHER -blam!-ER ITS A MOTHER -blam!-ING FORUM, OH WOW, YOU HAVE THE WORD NINJA BELOW YOUR NAME, HOW MOTHER -blam!-ING COOL, NOT, YOUR ARE NOTHING TO ME BUT A BRAINWASHED PIECE OF SHIT BLOGGER, PEOPLE ONLY LIKE YOU BECAUSE YOU HAVE NINJA BELOW YOUR NAME, SO PLEASE PUNCH YOURAELF IN THE FACE AND STAB YOUR EYE BECAUSE YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A PIECE OF SHIT OF SOCIETY
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Forgewolf | Heroic Unstoppable!
 
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We always say to fight fire, you must use fire. This is wrong. Fighting fire with fire will leave scars and a new flame will rise. We must instead use water. It is the opposite of fire, it extinguishes the fire, it cools, it refreshes, it heals. We are made up of 70% water, we are not made up of 70% fire. Please practice what we truly are
First of all, I told her I probably won't want children when I'm older.

Secondly, the two universities I've chosen both involve going abroad for a year to study.

I can see any justification for her being upset with me over these two choices I've made. Surely my life shouldn't be a surrogate for her desires, but it's at the point where day-to-day stuff is incredibly tense because she's so fucking mad at me. I put this in Serious because I want actual advice on how to diffuse the situation.

Spoiler
Yes, I've tried just talking to her about it.
Spoiler
No, it didn't work.
Spoiler
It never works.
You two need to smoke a joint and then have a down to Earth conversation. I bet you'll get all the answers you are looking for an have a deeper insight of what goes on in her head.


 
Hahahaha very funny Zonda
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big dog | Mythic Inconceivable!
 
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I love you, son.
Wow my mum is doing the opposite. Does she want me gone?


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"With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censured, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably."
β€”Judge Aaron Satie
β€”β€”Carmen
Who cares what she thinks? I ripped off the leech that is my mother years ago.


 
 
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<.<
My mother didn't want to talk to me when I said Death is my God but, then I told her some inappropriate words to describe her Christian God <.<
くら-γ‚Šγ‚“γ いん まい すきん
ぜず をうん぀ ういる ねば ひある


 
Hahahaha very funny Zonda
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<.<
My mother didn't want to talk to me when I said Death is my God but, then I told her some inappropriate words to describe her Christian God <.<
くら-γ‚Šγ‚“γ いん まい すきん
ぜず をうん぀ ういる ねば ひある
I have no idea what you said something about a ring?
Kura-ringu in mai sukin
zezu wountsu uiru neba hearu
<.<


 
Hahahaha very funny Zonda
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<.<
My mother didn't want to talk to me when I said Death is my God but, then I told her some inappropriate words to describe her Christian God <.<
くら-γ‚Šγ‚“γ いん まい すきん
ぜず をうん぀ ういる ねば ひある
I have no idea what you said something about a ring?
Kura-ringu in mai sukin
zezu wountsu uiru neba hearu
<.<
>implying I didn't translate it to English to see if I understood
Just tell me whatchu wrote bruh
Kura-ringu in mai sukin
Crawling in my skin
zezu wountsu uiru neba hearu
These wounds will never heal

<_<


 
Hahahaha very funny Zonda
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Mr. Psychologist
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<.<
My mother didn't want to talk to me when I said Death is my God but, then I told her some inappropriate words to describe her Christian God <.<
くら-γ‚Šγ‚“γ いん まい すきん
ぜず をうん぀ ういる ねば ひある
I have no idea what you said something about a ring?
Kura-ringu in mai sukin
zezu wountsu uiru neba hearu
<.<
>implying I didn't translate it to English to see if I understood
Just tell me whatchu wrote bruh
Kura-ringu in mai sukin
Crawling in my skin
zezu wountsu uiru neba hearu
These wounds will never heal

<_<
Ooh ooh
十 γ˜γ‚…γ™γ¨ γ‹γ‚Œγ© めい えげじ γ΅γ‰γŠγ う ちぁがと
</3

And a little note, 十 doesn't work as You <_<
It's Jyu so ya γ‚…= you


 
Hahahaha very funny Zonda
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Mr. Psychologist
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<.<
My mother didn't want to talk to me when I said Death is my God but, then I told her some inappropriate words to describe her Christian God <.<
くら-γ‚Šγ‚“γ いん まい すきん
ぜず をうん぀ ういる ねば ひある
I have no idea what you said something about a ring?
Kura-ringu in mai sukin
zezu wountsu uiru neba hearu
<.<
>implying I didn't translate it to English to see if I understood
Just tell me whatchu wrote bruh
Kura-ringu in mai sukin
Crawling in my skin
zezu wountsu uiru neba hearu
These wounds will never heal

<_<
Ooh ooh
十 γ˜γ‚…γ™γ¨ γ‹γ‚Œγ© めい えげじ γ΅γ‰γŠγ う ちぁがと
</3

And a little note, 十 doesn't work as You <_<
It's Jyu so ya γ‚…= you
I know it represents 10 but I'm not saying you
It's jew so ya 十= Jew

Ahh so you are calling me a Jew <______<


 
Hahahaha very funny Zonda
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Mr. Psychologist
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<.<
My mother didn't want to talk to me when I said Death is my God but, then I told her some inappropriate words to describe her Christian God <.<
くら-γ‚Šγ‚“γ いん まい すきん
ぜず をうん぀ ういる ねば ひある
I have no idea what you said something about a ring?
Kura-ringu in mai sukin
zezu wountsu uiru neba hearu
<.<
>implying I didn't translate it to English to see if I understood
Just tell me whatchu wrote bruh
Kura-ringu in mai sukin
Crawling in my skin
zezu wountsu uiru neba hearu
These wounds will never heal

<_<
Ooh ooh
十 γ˜γ‚…γ™γ¨ γ‹γ‚Œγ© めい えげじ γ΅γ‰γŠγ う ちぁがと
</3

And a little note, 十 doesn't work as You <_<
It's Jyu so ya γ‚…= you
I know it represents 10 but I'm not saying you
It's jew so ya 十= Jew

Ahh so you are calling me a Jew <______<
あんげ う かるげ めう えどじ >:c

Aha fair enough >.>

I think we should leave meta's thread alone though <.<


 
Hahahaha very funny Zonda
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TUNNEL SNAKES RULE
(ΰΈ‡ Ν‘Ν‘ Β° ͜ Κ– Ν‘ Β°)ο»ΏΰΈ‡
That mean you're coming to murica if you ahve to go abroad?


 
 
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<.<
That mean you're coming to murica if you ahve to go abroad?

RIP Meta, shot for not tipping enough in a restaurant ;_;7


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I am always around, but never seen. I am often avoided, but you can't out run me. for I will come when you're old and grey, or maybe even the very next day. I will come with cold embrace, and give you rest with a chilled kiss on your face. I come in many forms of emotional state, whether it's irony, love, laughter, or hate. I am everyone's final fate.
The kids thing I understand, every mother wants to become a grandmother.


 
More Than Mortal
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This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang but a whimper.
That mean you're coming to murica if you ahve to go abroad?
Fuck yeah, baby.


 
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This is not the greatest sig in the world, no. This is just a tribute.
That mean you're coming to murica if you ahve to go abroad?
Fuck yeah, baby.
Whoooo! Party!