I've never heard of any Buddhists going out of their way to promote Buddhism.

That's p weird.

How is that BS'ing?

Food is usually the only thing on my mind.

http://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/84298833/0/0/1

Feel free to brave the horrors of B.lind to loot this thread of any good ones >.>

Quote from: Officer Nasty on January 07, 2015, 06:39:16 PM

Is this image humorous?

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fucking lol Gatsby sent me this on snapchat ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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It seemed like just another normal day in the life of chair, who spends his time posting cringe-worthy shit on Sep7agon and talking to himself on his own forum. However, this particular day would end up changing chair's life forever.

As chair was about to begin his daily ritual of fapping in front of his shrine dedicated to Felicia, he heard something fiddling with the door. chair became furious and screamed, "Mom, how many times do I have to tell you!? I don't wanna go to the playground today!" An unusual silence followed chair's screams, prompting him to put his My Little Pony themed pajama pants back on and slowly creep up to the door. The unknown visitor continued to mess with the lock, causing chair's arm pits and the area beneath his man-boobs to begin perspiring in fear. "I don't know who you are," said chair as he reached for his toy lightsaber, "but I won't go down without a fight!" All of a sudden, the door rapidly busted open, sending chair flailing back on his bed. Before he could get up, a masked person wearing a black jumpsuit grabbed his arms and kept him down on the bed. As chair struggled to free himself of his captor, another identical person wielded with a baseball bat approached them. "It'll all be over soon," whispered the person holding chair down with a strong English accent. The baseball bat collided with chair's head, knocking him out cold.

After a few hours of being unconscious, chair awoke lying in a strange, dimly-lit room tied to a bed with nothing but his underwear on. Before he could even speak, the mysterious masked individual arose from the corner of the room and exclaimed, "Oi! He's awake!" The large wooden door opposite of the bed slowly creaked open, revealing two females. One was adorned in a white toga, while the other was wearing some kind of white fursuit with a fluffy tail on the back. "We've been expecting you, chair." Said the woman in the toga with a thick Greek accent. chair began tugging on the ropes holding him down but to no avail. "Who are you and why are you doing this to me!?" Screamed chair with tears streaming down his greasy, pudgy face. "It's okay, chair, there's no need to cry," Said the Greek woman soothingly as she slowly approached the bed. "We're here to help you."

Before chair could say another word, the Greek woman laid her hands on his thighs and slowly caressed upwards to the bottom of his underwear. "I...I don't understand," he muttered quietly as she began removing his underwear, eventually exposing his hairy, miniature penis. She glared back at chair and retorted authoritatively, "Not another word." Then, she reached around her back, untied her toga, and revealed her naked body to chair with the woman in the white fursuit still lurking behind her. "Now," said the Greek woman as she climbed on the bed and sat on chair's hairy thighs, "You are just going to follow my lead." She untied chair's hands and feet from the bed, grabbed his hands, and put them on her warm, plump breasts. Despite being extremely attractive and continuing to stroke his penis, he never became fully erect. This began to frustrate the Greek woman as she stroked and stroked but he still remained flaccid. "What's wrong, chair?" She asked as she went upright and stopped stroking. "Are you not attracted to women?" chair started to stammer as he too was confused as to why he couldn't get his tiny penis to grow. "What? N-No, I'm not gay!" chair exclaimed. "I love women! As a matter of fact, I masturbate to girls' vaginas every day!" The Greek woman ascended off of him and smiled. "It's okay, I know what we need to do," She said seductively as she motioned the woman in the fursuit to approach them. "Lie on your stomach." She commanded, and chair obeyed, turning around on his stomach. "Now, get on all-fours." chair again obeyed her commands, but asked, "What is this for?" The Greek woman gently pat his back, eyed the fox woman and replied, "Maybe my friend applesauce will be able to please you." chair's head perked up in an instant and remembered where he has heard the name 'applesauce' before. "Wait, applesauce?!?! You mean the mod from Sep7agon? What's happe-"

Before chair could finish speaking, the Greek woman gagged his mouth with an old rag and held him down. This prompted applesauce to remove her fursuit, becoming completely nude. chair spotted something extremely shocking about applesauce in the corner of his eye as she slowly approached his exposed butt hole. He began shaking and spazzing in fear at the sight of applesauce's monstrous, pulsating cock preparing to be jammed into his unwelcoming anal sphincter.

chair loved his toys. He had all sorts of them; he had My Little Pony figurines, he had Sonic the Hedgehog action figures, and he had Pokemon cards galore. His favorite toy, however, was not a toy in the conventional sense of the word, but the fun he had with it was reminiscent of the fun a two year old has with his brand new puppy. This toy, or rather, collection of toys, was used to the fullest every day by the carefree chair. These toys were, of course, his cartoon themed diapers. He loved his adult diapers more than anything in the world. Characters from every kid's show imaginable littered the stunted man's undergarments, and he loved them all equally. He would often go through them, sorting through them, trying to find the most efficient sequence to wear them in to maximize his fun, and his happiness. His diaper closet was his happy place, and it was certainly the place where most of his time was spent. Whenever he had to go into the outside world, to leave the comfort of his mother's home, he would remember how safe he felt in that room.

That room was were his mind retreated to as applesauce's unlubricated monster-cock began to prod at his surprisingly loose bum. Slowly, but surely, applesauce's rod penetrated chair's butthole, eliciting more than a few cries from the poor soul below her. applesauce groaned in pleasure, savoring the sweet scent of his submission. At some point, chair began to sob, but the Greek woman quickly put an end to that, slapping him hard across the face.

“There will be no crying tonight, boy. You will take your punishment like a man.”

chair's gagged face struggled to look up at the woman's face as he was pounded by applesauce. The woman had a fiery look in her eyes; she had a look of pure and unhinged lust. Not for chair, of course, as both applesauce and the other woman were repulsed by him, but for the situation. The Greek woman loved the power she had over him. She savored it as she watched the poor boy be ravaged by applesauce's massive dog-cock.

Unsurprisingly, chair's flaccid cock began to harden as the anal stimulation continued. His sobs turned to grunts, which then became a steady stream of feminine moans. Soon, he was begging applesauce to thrust harder as he pushed himself as much as he was able to into her hips. The Greek woman, still looking down on chair, noticed his shame growing, and quickly disappeared from his view. chair, oblivious to his surroundings in his ecstasy, continued to moan like the bitch he was, not noticing the woman's return.

The Greek woman moved down to the center of the small bed, and began to stroke chair's thigh with one hand. Her other hand, chair eventually noticed, was concealed behind her back. As chair was beginning to slip back into his semi-aware state of anal-pounding bliss, the Greek woman quickly shoved his semi-hard erection into a silver chastity cage, locking it with a small, silver key, which she threw carelessly to the other side of the room.

“Mhphhffmf!!!” chair struggled to speak through his gag, but the surprise was obvious in his contorted face.

“My little man doesn't get to use his tool,” the Greek woman said through her thick accent. “My little man is nothing more than a cock sleeve for my friend applesauce here.”

chair's penis struggled to harden despite the metal prison, which caused him more than a little discomfort. His moans slowly turned, once again, to sobs, and, no longer able to even consider the prospect of enjoying this pounding he'd always craved, his body relaxed, accepting applesauce's intrusions unemotionally. His fantasies would be fulfilled another day, he chairded. For now, he would let applesauce have her way with him, contented to patiently wait for an opportunity to escape.


The Greek woman smiled at the scene before her.

“Damn,” she thought, “applesauce has some crazy stamina.”

It had been three hours since chair's torture had begun. He was barely conscious now; his eyes lolled back into his head, his sobs had long since evaporated into the occasional sharp exhale. His used ass was, at this point, numb. Not that he noticed this, of course, in his semi-conscious state. Any time that he was even partially lucid, though, he was desperately searching for an opportunity to escape his captors.

It was in one of these states that he noticed applesauce's pace quicken. His intense interest in homoerotica allowed him to deduce what was happening; applesauce was close to her climax. Her tennis ball sized testicles that had been slapping against him in the hours before hadn't really set off any red flags, but now, as the explosion approached, he realized just how stuffed he might get.  applesauce's breathing soon grew erratic, her thrusts quickened in pace, but lost any sort of rhythmic order, and, at this change, chair became fully conscious once more. Soon after, applesauce's balls contracted, she screamed in bliss, and a deluge of thick semen erupted from her monstrous dog cock. Load after load poured into chair's colon, quickly filling him to the brim with the baby juice.

chair was almost immediately filled to capacity, but applesauce's balls were far from empty, and after her three hour fuck, she wasn't about to stop on his account. The cum began to spill out of his hole, around her dog cock, and pool on the bed. Her orgasm lasted for at least fifteen minutes. chair tried to keep count of the loads: “598, 599, 600...” He lost count around 600.

As applesauce's orgasm began to die down, as each spurt contained less and less, chair slowly reassessed his situation. “I wish that I was a real Power Ranger,” he thought. “Then shit like this wouldn't happen to me.” After applesauce's last pump, she sighed and slowly slipped out of the shivering chair. She looked down at her handiwork and smiled at the huge pool of her seed that had formed under chair's bum. The Greek woman patted her on the back and stepped into chair's view. She motioned something to applesauce, who proceeded to stand near the head of the bed.

“So, chair, how did you enjoy your treatment?” the Greek woman asked.

applesauce quickly removed the gag from the poor ESE reject's mouth. He coughed, and then spoke. “I fucking HATED it, you cunt. What the fuck is wrong with you two? How the fuck could you DO this to someone, especially someone as saintly as ME?”

The Greek woman chuckled. “Well, you see high chair, – can I call you high chair? – we have been we have been watching you for a while now, and we've noticed the kinky shit you're into. We've also observed how angry you are online, and we thought that we'd help you loosen up a bit.”

“Loosen up a bit? HELP ME? YOU JUST FUCKING RAPED ME YOU CRAZY CUNT! THIS IS WHY I HATE THE HUMAN RACE!”

“See what I mean? You're too angry. You need to lighten up.”

chair grumbled a bit at this. He knew that he needed to lighten up. He'd said it enough on the forums. Of course, he also knew that he would never be able to keep his promise. It was a vicious cycle, his life. It was an endless cycle of tantrums and reforms, meltdowns and promises of betterment. He would never be better, of course, as you can't cure your genetics, but that didn't stop his promises.

“Fine,” chair said, “do what you want with me.”

“Excellent! Have you ever heard of sounding?” The Greek woman said this with that same fire in here eyes as when she set her dog, applesauce, off on him.

chair's eyes widened at this. He'd tried it a few times, but the last time he did it, he fucked up bad. He shuttered recalling his terror when the glass broke inside...

“NO! ANYTHING BUT THAT!” chair began to cry again, pulling desperately at his restraints.

A little known condition of those with down syndrome gives those afflicted with it a denser muscle mass. This is what gives them their stereotypical strength. Luckily, chair's condition included this affliction, considering the situation.

chair pulled, and he pulled, and he pulled, and just as the Greek woman was removing his chastity cage to begin inserting the long, plastic rod that she held in her hand, he broke free of his restraints. He quickly rolled off of the bed and sprang up to his feet, pushing the Greek woman out of the way. The woman barked a command to applesauce who, now clad once more in her fursuit, bounded after chair on all fours. chair was already sprinting towards the nearest door, which he reached, opened, stepped through, and slammed behind him. He heard a loud and painful THUMP on the other side of the door, which was undoubtedly applesauce. After hearing a soft whimper, he locked the door, and bounded off down the hallway that the door opened into.

Quote from: Officer Nasty on January 06, 2015, 09:01:23 PM

Because I do interesting things and I'm an interesting person. What is there not to like?

Let's do it baby