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Messages - Word Wizard

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601
The Flood / Re: First official Force Awakens poster
« on: October 18, 2015, 01:58:14 PM »
Damn Chewy looks straight thuggin

602
The Flood / Re: How are your midterm grades?
« on: October 18, 2015, 12:18:40 PM »
Straight A's

My family would disown me if they found out they were gay A's

603
The Flood / Re: You are in a prison shower...
« on: October 17, 2015, 05:39:10 PM »
Good thing I had this installed in my rectum

604
The Flood / Re: Most unfunny comedians?
« on: October 17, 2015, 08:57:08 AM »
Every cast member of SNL

605
Gaming / Re: TotalBiscuit is diagnosed with incurable cancer
« on: October 16, 2015, 10:25:01 PM »
There's literally nothing wrong with cancer jokes or telling people to get cancer and die.
Get cancer and die, faggot
no YOU get cancer and die, faggot

606
Gaming / Re: TotalBiscuit is diagnosed with incurable cancer
« on: October 16, 2015, 07:42:13 PM »
There's literally nothing wrong with cancer jokes or telling people to get cancer and die.
Get cancer and die, faggot

607
The Flood / Re: Why don't you lift weights?
« on: October 16, 2015, 02:10:47 PM »
Your body looks really fucking strange in the core.

608
The Flood / Re: Why don't you lift weights?
« on: October 16, 2015, 01:54:57 PM »
To the people complaining about time, you don't need to spend two hours working out.  Doing key lifts, I could get a solid work out in under an hour.  And you don't have to work out 6 days a week either, that's top level shit.  Your first year you will make gains working out 3 days a week.

If you don't have money for a gym membership, then you can do body weight training.

609
Serious / Re: So, I read George Orwell's 1984 last week...
« on: October 16, 2015, 09:23:20 AM »
And it's obviously not enough.

People keep telling me that crime rates are going down--they should be nonexistent.

The presence of surveillance won't stop crime 100% though.  People still kill and rape people in prison and they are surrounded by cameras and guards.  Cameras might help in catching people after the fact but there would still be crimes commited.  Unless the cameras have lethal lasers that preemptively kill crimimals, a camera won't prevent a crime, and more than likely there won't be police near by able to intervene.

610
The Flood / Re: Which sport produces the best athletes?
« on: October 16, 2015, 09:01:32 AM »
Gymnastics.  Them people gotta have complete control of their body.

611
[spoilr]Can't believe they cut off Halsey's other arm.  Bold move 343.spoiilr]

This isn't a real spoiler.

612
The Flood / Re: Fantastic Four might go back to Marvel... yay?
« on: October 15, 2015, 11:59:38 AM »
I think it should go back, regardless if they plan to use them.  Marvel should own all the rights to their characters.

613
The Flood / Re: banter thread
« on: October 14, 2015, 06:13:51 PM »
"Jaws: The Great White" the poster said.  There were no pictures on it -- just a name to a nearby buffet.. 
"What a weird place to feature a showing of jaws I thought to myself."  I looked around that back at the paper.  "7:30 huh?" I mumbled to no one in particular.  I ain't got plans, I might as well check it out.  I looked at my watch, it was a quarter past 7.  I guess I better hurry if I wanna make it.  I headed towards the buffet.

Some time later

There's the buffet.  The SHING PING CHOW BONG CHINESE BUFFET sign was glowing above the entrance.  I opened the door to see the place was packed.  Looking in, there was a narrow corridor leading to a counter that "L"ed off to the dining area.  People were cheering, but there was no way I could see anything.  One of the chinese workers was making their way through the mob and was kinda close, I figured I'd ask him some questions. 
"Ay yo Ching Chang!" I hollered out.  I seen his ears move like a dog's picking up on a sound. 
"Herro there."  he said upon turning to me.
"I got a question kimosabi, why is a chinese buffet premiering a shark movie?"
"Shark?" he said back, most likely not able to hear me over the chanting.  "We do not serve sushi sir."
I reached into my pocket and pulled out the crumpled up poster I just so happened to snag.  I handed it to to him; he read it.
"Oh you mean the Great White man" he said with squinty gook smile on his face. 
"Great White man?" I shot back.
"Yes, other white men watched him devour everything in his path, so they began carring him Jaws."

Just then there was a loud crash next to me as a man in a chair broke through the wall, hitting the poor chinese worker so hard they were both insta-gibbed. 
"MURRIKA!" shouted one of the on lookers raising his beer to the air.
I looked over at the source of the flying man, just beginning to realize how big the hole in the wall was.
My eyes peeked over the threshold, disturbed by what I saw.  There was a massively dense man in a ring of tables.  Upon further inspection I noticed they were reinforced to the floor.  As I scanned raising my head I was hit with the sudden realization that there were people in chairs actually orbiting the fat ass.  Then it hit me.  It's Kinder.

614
Gaming / Re: Waypoint was a mistake. It's nothing but trash.
« on: October 13, 2015, 11:05:25 PM »
21 maps is quite a few, isn't that like the most a Halo game's ever come out with at launch?
I believe the issue is because there are more niche specific maps (warzone and break out maps will only be in those playlists exclusively) as opposed to previous games being separated by just slayer and big team (which was still essentially slayer).

615
The Flood / Re: How do you deal with straight edges?
« on: October 13, 2015, 03:16:54 PM »
This thread just reminds me that it is so much easier to claim to be straight edge when you aren't old enough to drink or buy smokes.

Old enough to buy cigarettes - still don't
Offered alcohol at parties - always decline

Pretty sure a bunch of others are the same.

616
The Flood / Re: Planning Methods (Writing)
« on: October 13, 2015, 02:37:12 PM »
I don't really have one.  I just did a historical fiction 1st person narrative of John Wilkes Boothe and my professor liked it so much she asked me to email her an additional copy to use  as an example for future classes.  The paper I'm writing now, a textual analysis, is what's giving me trouble.

617
The Flood / Re: How do you deal with straight edges?
« on: October 13, 2015, 02:28:11 PM »
Scrabble?

618
The Flood / Re: How to make your own fleshlight
« on: October 13, 2015, 02:26:27 PM »
Alternative version:  Queef light

1 pound of pink Flarp
1 empty paper towel roll

619
Serious / Re: Glenn Beck's most recent book: "It IS About Islam"
« on: October 12, 2015, 10:04:49 PM »
I get it. You hate Muslims. You think they should die.
I hate Muslims because I think belief X has the capacity to cause action A?

You have a funny way of defining hate.

Stop hiding behind language. Your intent is obvious. Just fucking say it. Don't be a fucking pussy like a politician. You want every Muslim to die. If given the chance you would have a Muslim final solution.
Then I'd be at a loss to explain why I think the Kurdish and Rohingya struggles are some of the most important struggles of our time, or how I feel equal hatred towards groups like anti-Balaka or how I think the "cleansing" of Muslims in the CAR is a tragedy.

Too many caveats, really.

But then you would admit it's Good Muslims and Bad Muslims, which is what I'm saying. If there are good and bad, then it isn't the religion
Or maybe, the Quran (like the Bible) has text that contradicts other parts of itself and people choose one side of it over the other, for what ever reason.

620
Serious / Re: Glenn Beck's most recent book: "It IS About Islam"
« on: October 12, 2015, 07:35:02 PM »
The reason that there are so many Islamic terrorists is poverty.
http://wikiislam.net/wiki/Muslim_Statistics_-_Terrorism#Economic_and_Social_Conditions

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler

621
The Flood / Re: memes that need to die
« on: October 11, 2015, 11:37:48 AM »
What the heck is an image macro?
Images with impact font over them.

The classic "Meme" image.
Oh.  Well then I too am in agreement.

622
The Flood / Re: What would you do with a prehensile penis?
« on: October 11, 2015, 11:35:09 AM »
I wouldn't have to use my hands to rub in pubic lotion for my genital worts

It would be like a wind shield wiper for my pubes.

623
The Flood / Re: What would you do with a prehensile penis?
« on: October 11, 2015, 11:32:32 AM »
I would actually use the front hole on my boxers.

624
The Flood / Re: English language skills test
« on: October 11, 2015, 11:31:19 AM »
Find the word for the definition:

1) Fictional tiger that was friends with Pooh
Tony the Tiger

Quote
2) Opposite of smaller.
THIS DICK

Quote
3) The part of a gun squeezed to discharge a bullet
Don't know this one

Quote
4) Someone who rigs things can be called this.
What is "a politician" for 600 Alex.

Quote
5) Someone who digs holes
Ground hog

Quote
6) Someone who annoys you.
Mormons

625
The Flood / Re: memes that need to die
« on: October 11, 2015, 11:26:04 AM »
What the heck is an image macro?

626
The Flood / Re: What did you losers do today?
« on: October 11, 2015, 08:45:10 AM »
Writing a lame ass textual analysis then studying for midterms tomorrow.

627
The Sprint S3 E2 for those who haven't watched it.

YouTube


Mmmm Lauren Baeley

You mean Laura Bailey?

Good catch m8.

628
Hellurr, straight crown and a burrr
And after I'm finished you know I'mma drink some murrr
But I got 20/20 vision when I'm pitchin, listen
I spot them chickens never slippin like a transmission
You like Baileys, I like ladies, I'm quite crazy
And maybe a little shady to hit tonight baby
Cookies, I gotta bang, they wanna hang with a real nigga
All day, everyday, by myself, not a game
Wanna go night-night, nigga?
I'mma so nice I lit up, like a swisher
I don't know why I bit her
We won't stroke by my ni-nuts, Papa getcha
Wi-wi-wi-witch if you hide the puta
Away from me then you can blow me, like a hookah
They know I'm a crowded prusta
On the pooty tang, ya booty bang
And I wish I was your loofah
Oooh, you're sweeter than Dean and DeLuca
Trying to boost ya, this my number that I shoot ya

629
The Sprint S3 E2 for those who haven't watched it.

YouTube


Mmmm Laura Baeley

630
The Flood / Re: What's your jam?
« on: October 10, 2015, 04:25:06 PM »
YouTube

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