Poll

Teutons win, no point in voting now

glorious vikings
7 (46.7%)
stupid christfags
8 (53.3%)

Total Members Voted: 15

Apparently Christ can't protect crashes: TW: Attila *End*

 
Luciana
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Fun fact: The Teutonic Order is still around. They've somewhat returned to their original purpose (escorting German Christian settlers and establishing hospitals) in recent years, providing spiritual and physical care to Germans abroad. Pretty cool if you ask me.
Not slaughtering? Bah!


 
Luciana
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Just an update. I was gonna play last night but MGS V grinding got the better of me.

2nd is that power right now is flickering due to this hurricane and the last thing I want is for me to have won a huge battle, only for the power to cut off. So if it calms down later tonight (or tomorrow), I'll start then.


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But I guess in the end -- Sort of feels like everyday its harder to stay happy where you are. There are all these ways to look through the fence into your neighbor's yard.

Why even risk it? its safer to stay distant.
grind


 
Luciana
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you'd like that


 
Luciana
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Okay, sorry for the delay everyone. Weather and MGS V grinding to the end occupied me, but I now have the first entry (and our choices) for this campaign.

Here's a song for the post

YouTube


Update 1
So like I said in the OP, our objective was to get our of the middle of everyone (you start around northern Poland). We only have one unit, no settlement, and need to move away from the ever aggressive Huns. So we made our way to THE UNITED KINGDOM where we will plant our seed~ in the heart of those filthy Britons, and show them the way of Christ. If we can secure the entire region (or at least, let's say, the north), we don't have to worry about attacks on all sides.

Speaking of which...



Right out of the gate, the Vandal Kingdom is the ONLY faction I've met that actually see's me favorably. Their strength rating is also 3rd best, so you know what that means. After a turn or two, I secured a non-aggression pact with them. A bit later, they countered my offer for going to war with the Picts (more on that in a sec), with a marriage proposal.

Marrying one of his women is great to increase our closeness, and starting off I'm going to need as much help as I can get. I'll be looking to keep these guys as my allies for a long long time, unless they drag me into some war. They have a trade agreement with the Persians though (I think they're the strongest in the game), so I shouldn't have to worry about that.

So anyway, I invade mid Britannia and take the Picts declare war on me. I need a place to settle and defend against large numbers, so I invade one of the Caledonians unwalled cities and take it easily (however this makes me go to war with them as well). Naturally, both are trying to attack me.



The Picts and Calashits both team up to try and take me out and silence Christ. This must not be allowed to happen. To battle we go!

Battle
The great thing about cities? Choke points. When you're outnumbered, a single few units can pull a 300 and route waves of enemies. The Calashits tried to invade me from the East, and the Picts from the West.



I don't think the Caledonians expected such a slaughter, and by only two of my units. They had around 7. Again, choke points will be KEY for us when defending early on until we can push back.



Another choke point managed to tie the Picts up and me flank them to route them. At this point the units are about to break off and flee.



Which is what they did. After losing so many men, they threw their arms down and ran (A SHAMEFER DISPRAY!) like the stupid barbarians they are.



Or rather, they tried to run. The Caledonians lost a top general, and the Picts (as pictured above) lost their faction LEADER. Big mistake for them, as the balance will easily tip in my favor now.



They gave me a "close" victory (probably because I lost a disposable unit or two) instead of an heroic one, but the numbers don't lie. It was a slaughter for then.



And like I said, they lost their leader.

A few sides notes apart from me directly is that the Vandals decided to join me in war with the Picts, but they're all the way in Africa, sooo... I doubt they'll be of much help.



The Huns are also doing what they do best, and that is declaring war on everyone and burning shit.

Now for our decisions. My FIRST question is this.



This man is trying to sell a relic that apparently drowned a saint of ours 13 times (how do you drown 13 times? Unless this man is some wizard, you only drown once. Idiots), and wants us to take the bribe. Do we do so and take this holy relic? Or do we expose him of him crimes (read what it says lol)?

Lastly



I'll post a map update every entry to see us slowly expanding. Now, do we go up north and secure our northern borders against the weakened Picts who lost their leader? Or do we push south against the Caledonians? The latter will be the harder of the two options, and still leaves me vulnerable to the north however, but this is your guys's decisions! Like I said, we rise together and fall together.

Last Edit: October 01, 2015, 08:15:47 PM by Luciana


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THE WARRIORS OF CHRIST SHALL NOT BE SWAYED BY COIN!

Also, kick the Picts while they're down.


 
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I hope the Vikings win.


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I hope the Vikings win.

Gilgamesh is a pansy.


 
big sponge
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I hope the Vikings win.

Gilgamesh is a pansy.



I don't see you killing the bull of heaven nigguh


 
Luciana
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LC, pitch your onions, pls.


 
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my what?


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hey
Nice update Luci!

BEAT THOSE BRITS


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I hope the Vikings win.

Gilgamesh is a pansy.



I don't see you killing the bull of heaven nigguh

You don't see me throwing a fit just because my friend died and causing a ruckus in the underworld, either.


 
big sponge
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I hope the Vikings win.

Gilgamesh is a pansy.



I don't see you killing the bull of heaven nigguh

You don't see me throwing a fit just because my friend died and causing a ruckus in the underworld, either.

Ishtar is a bitch.


 
Ender
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teach those filthy pagans who's boss


 
Luciana
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my what?
Your opinion on what I should do >:I


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I hope the Vikings win.

Gilgamesh is a pansy.



I don't see you killing the bull of heaven nigguh

You don't see me throwing a fit just because my friend died and causing a ruckus in the underworld, either.

Ishtar is a bitch.

Yeah, she is.


 
True Turquoise
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fuck you
BORING


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gurb
you start around northern Poland

I think you mean Preußen.
Last Edit: October 02, 2015, 12:41:56 AM by Mmmmm Napalm


 
Luciana
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you start around northern Poland

I think you mean Preußen.
No clue, my geo sucks.


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gurb
you start around northern Poland

I think you mean Preußen.
No clue, my geo sucks.
Northern Poland was once Prussia, which would become the German state that led the German unification movement after the Seven Weeks' War, which excluded Austria from the unification movement.
Last Edit: October 02, 2015, 12:51:28 AM by Mmmmm Napalm


 
Luciana
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you start around northern Poland

I think you mean Preußen.
No clue, my geo sucks.
Northern Poland was once Prussia, which would become the German state that led the German unification movement after the Seven Weeks' War, which excluded Austria from the unification movement.
Oh hm...

I literally just looked up a modern map and did that :P

I wasn't going historical on it. The further east in Europe it goes, the more shit I get at the knowledge.


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The healthy man does not torture others - generally it is the tortured who turn into torturers.


 
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Luciana
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Small update.

Picts are now ded and sailed away far north. I'll make a full post tomorrow when I do a bit more besides on battle.


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Picts are now ded and sailed away far north.

>Not chasing them down and massacring the craven pagans

What are you, an unbeliever?


 
Luciana
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Picts are now ded and sailed away far north.

>Not chasing them down and massacring the craven pagans

What are you, an unbeliever?
I lied, they're just kinda chilling next to northern England. I'll make another entry tonight maybe.


 
Luciana
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Hey guys, sorry this took a few days. Here with the 2nd update.

Update 2
Here with a 2nd update. Not as much as the first, but still some important things.



The first thing to happen is I actually managed to get on more friendly terms with people. Not a bunch of red faces now, but people who are more or less indifferent to me, and slowly liking me more. I managed to secure a non-aggression pact with the FILTHY FRENCH, so that's good.



However the thorn at my side was securing the north I can't fight a war on two fronts just yet, so I need to do something.

Battle 1


With siege equipment in tow, I was ready to scale the walls and break the gates of these backwards barbarians.



They naturally sent all of their forces to meet my men. The battle would be won or lost depending on this skirmish.



However the problem was they didn't hold to a single chokepoint (gotta love the AI) but instead tried to meet me on multiple fronts. This proved to be their downfall, as their forces were quickly outflanked and routed, allowing me to push in. I killed their general in the process here too, which sent a moral shock to their entire army

(Note: there are 3 tiers of units, tier 1 being early/low grade units, tier 3 being top end. If a general dies in the midst of battle, the tier 1 will basically break easily with any sign of wrong doings, tier 2 will be shaken, and tier 3 will still fight on. These were tier 1, and usually make up the bulk of Barbarian armies)




In the end I managed to surround the last unit with pikemen holding them on one end, and infantry and cavalry destroying them from the back.



Naturally, a decisive victory for me.




BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GO- I mean Christ...



Bye bye Picts. You won't be missed.

An interesting thing to note as I pushed further south to wipe out the Caledonians, was the title boy was born. They play a cool cutscene too (give it a watch).

YouTube



Attila is born. Aka: Huns are now overpowered as shit for a while. Good thing I got out of there.



Nothing to note here. Simply auto-resolved the attacks from the Caledonians and took them out. EZ-PZ



And now here is the update of the map. As you can see, the entire North is ours, and we now control 1/3rd of Britannia Inferior (smug Rome names much?). The faction below me is the Geats (who somehow sailed all the way from Viking land over to there and got a city...), and below that is the Britain faction. Both are pretty even with me on strength level, but to the west is the FILTHY Irish (Ebdanians). They're at war with... all of them lol, so I think we'll attack them next as the logical choice.



And here is a random video for your pleasure.

YouTube




Last Edit: October 04, 2015, 05:15:33 AM by Luciana


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Lol they got absolutely fucked.


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I managed to secure a non-aggression pact with the FILTHY FRENCH, so that's good.